Post # 92
If you don’t have a wedding coordinator have someone in charge that knows the schedule. When I was at my best friends wedding everyone was milling about when the ceremony needed to start. I ended up taking charge to get people to all go sit down.
Otherwise we had a great time, the food was just ok but the booze was flowing and we had some good tunes.
Post # 93
@tiff-tiff-tiff: I enjoyed the last wedding I attended because the ceremony was very personal – I felt as if I knew the B and G better after the ceremony, and they spent time with each of their guests, which was lovely.
On the other hand – the food was mediocre and the cupcakes (in lieu of wedding cake) were messy.
Post # 94
Some more lessons…
Quantity and quality of food are both important. I don’t know what is worse: being served a ton of mediocre food, or a teeny portion of amazing food. I did feel bad for a bride recently (or really for her parents, who were paying) as their food was divine, and judging from the venue they were paying top dollar, but the portions were really small, like 4 or 5 ounces of protein and a tiny bundle of 4 baby carrots. Everyone was still starving after dinner!
Not too many people like Powerpoint. You hate it at work when you’re getting paid to read it. Don’t make your guests suffer through 20 minutes of slides that go back to kindergarten. If you must do a slideshow, leave the inside jokes out because anyone who doesn’t get them is going to feel like an outsider.
Every butt gets a chair. Nuff said. Not providing enough chairs for the ceremony is a stupid way to try to save a dollar.
And probably the most important: Your wedding is not really all that unique, and it doesn’t have to be. There’s only so many colors in the rainbow and so many variations on a wedding gown; sooner or later, someone is going to pick “your” colors or wear a similar gown. Don’t lose your mind over it. Nobody’s going to remember those details anyway, but they will remember you stamping your feet and throwing a fit over Tiffany Blue. When my sister got married, she was the first in our social circle to do a wine box ceremony; a year later, one of her friends asked her if she’d mind if the friend did a wine box too. My sister was so touched and thrilled! She didn’t scream about someone copying her. She actually gave the friend a tip on where to get the box and some note cards for the guests. And I’m going to do a wine box too and still no foot-stamping from my sister; she’s actually so happy that people loved her ceremony enough to adopt some of it (I’m also using the same officiant as my sister and she couldn’t be happier).
Post # 95
I learnt that if the couple is truly, madly in love and surrounded by people that love them, all the other things honestly don’t matter.
Post # 96
@tiff-tiff-tiff: FOOD. I’ve been to a ton of weddings, especially lately. At almost every one of them, there was not enough food to make a difference. If you have a reception at a meal time, serve something substantial. Heavy appetizers are just fine, but if it’s 6:00 do not expect me not to get hangry if all you’ve served is meatballs and cake.
The most recent wedding I was in nailed it. She had buffet style dinner stations, but the food was always full, always hot, and it was substantial–a whole roasted pig, a mashed potato bar, heavy appetizers, etc. In addition to an open bar and cake. We were all fat and happy! Plus, like I said it was all hot no matter when you went to make a plate and I was so grateful for that since I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man and didn’t get to eat until much later in the party.
Also, if you have an aisle runner or anything that you’re going to be walking/standing/stepping on during the ceremony, try to have that at the rehearsal if at all possible. That is my ONE complaint from the awesome hot food wedding I mentioned above. Rehearsal was flawless, but there was an aisle runner at the ceremony (outdoor wedding) that wasn’t out at the rehearsal. It was some type of lightweight material, and all of our heels got stuck in it, not only punching holes but making it realllllllly hard to walk in the already hard to walk on in heels grass.
Post # 97
The bride and groom set the tone of the wedding. If they’re stressed out – the guests won’t have any fun. But if they’re having a great time – the guests probably will as well!
Post # 98
I learned if my child gets married, I will make a speech about them that makes them look good. We went to a wedding recently where the father of the bride gave a speech that was more of a roast than a toast, and in the most incredibly awkward way. It was full of backhanded compliments towards his daughter. I think a few years from now, that’s the only thing I’ll remember about this wedding!
Post # 99
If your ceremony and reception are at the same venue, and it’s a large venue, make it clear where people are supposed to go after the ceremony is over. Have the officiant make an announcement, post signs, have friends direct traffic…something.
The last wedding I attended was all at a large art museum, and guests just wandered aimlessly through the exhibits until they found the bar on the other side of the place. Also there was a courtyard with food being set up, and people were really confused about whether they could enter it or not.
It was nice to see the exhibits, but at the same time we weren’t really paying attention because we had no idea where we were ultimately going or what we would find there.
Post # 100
The last wedding I attended was mine! I learned that if you have a candy buffet and you’ve decided to provide small cellophane bags for the guests to use, MAKE DAMN SURE your candy lady doesnt sneak and put large white paper lunch bags on the buffet. Because if she does this (even after you ask her not to), 5-10 guests WILL fill the white paper lunch bags FULL and no one else will get any candy. You and your husband included.
ETA: I may or may not still be annoyed by the fact that I got no candy at my reception. Maybe.
Post # 101
My biggest complaint is the bride and groom taking off for pictures after the ceremony, and leaving guests for over 2 hours with minimal munchies. I know photos are important, but try to get the majority in before the ceremony so you don’t miss the party or leave your guests waiting all day
Post # 102
A few things! The last was my cousin’s wedding in June. It was a Destination Wedding to Foriday. They met in Nov. 2012, became engaged March 2013 and married June 2013.
1. Give your guests more than 2 months notice for a Destination Wedding. It is hard to make that work financially for a lot of people.
2. Don’t get mad at people who cannot attend any wedding (unless they back out last minute or are no shows), especially if it is because of financial reasons.
3. Food can be great buffet style as well! They had really delicious food!
4. Space chairs during ceremony to give guests room. Too close (especially in Floriday in June) is uncomfortable.
5. Simple centerpieces are beautiful and elegant (regardless of the type).
6. Small weddings are incredibly warm and charming. It makes everything so special and lets you spend time with those you really want to be there.
Post # 103
@Brielle: aww you give me hope for my Valentine’s Day/President’s Day wedding!
Post # 104
@Syzygy88: yeah, we may do the 15th, but we’re leaning more towards a Saturday so people can enjoy Sunday and Monday. I went to a Valentine’s Day wedding a few years ago and it was a BLAST! What better way to celebrate love than with a wedding? Plus it was a nice dinner for free (except for a gift : ) Our wedding is going to be primarily for family, I don’t think they’ll mind : ) But thanks for the input!
Post # 105
* Ensure you have PLENTY of beverages! I was at a wedding that was mostly DIY… They had a caterer truck which was pretty awesome and totally unique, but it was apparently the only source of non-alcoholic drinks! Sooo after dinner, when the trucks drove away, there was no water, no soda, nothing but beer and wine. And since I was designated driver, I was THIRSTY!
* Good food is a MUST!! My own wedding in August.. people are STILL raving over how awesome our cocktail hour (36 different hors d’oeurves!) was, and how good the meal was!
Post # 106
@tiff-tiff-tiff: i learned tbat having a good DJ and MC is important
I also learned that spee hes can be boring so I made sure I knew everyone who was giving a speech and told them to keep it short, simple funny and sweet
Make sure you have Good food