(Closed) What do I do?

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

he just proposed but he won’t talk about the wedding? was he pressured into proposing? honestly, it doesn’t sound like he’s ready to get married.

Post # 4
Member
6351 posts
Bee Keeper

Are you still in school?

Post # 5
Member
3012 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Interesting.  I know J isn’t big into talking about the wedding yet, but he doesn’t get angry if I bring anything up.  He just doesn’t care to think about it all yet since our wedding isn’t until 2012.  He just calls me crazy, but well, he’s a guy.  I would have a heart to heart with him.  Ask him why he seems to get angry/upset about the wedding topic.  If you don’t want to do that, then I say keep it to yourself for awhile.  Don’t make him feel like you’re rushing though the year is far off.  I often use this board to get my excitement, ideas, etc out.  It helps a lot so I don’t bombard J with a ton of things.

Post # 6
Member
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I wouldn’t pressure him about it here is the guys mindset when it comes to getting engaged and the wedding:

” O.k. whew I popped the question and she said yes, what a relief, I am so glad I have some down time now to enjoy being with my fiancee with no pressure from here about getting engaged”

And then the happy new bride to be steps in and says :”Let’s plan!”

It can be a scary thing for a guy, by nature, they are not planners. If the conversation comes up with his mother just say: “well we are just taking some time to enjoy our engagement, haven’t really set any details yet.”

If the situation is still the same in several months, then I would be getting concerned about his lack of enthusiasm for wanting to get married. Notice I say getting married and not the wedding, as most guys will not be jumping for joy about the logistics of planning a wedding.

Post # 8
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

My Fiance was stressed about the wedding for a good while – I was getting all into the details, he was freaking out about where the money was going to come from to pay for everything. Now he’s fairly ok with it. Have you joint finances or separate? Have you an idea/plan for how much you can afford to spend? TBH the only really useful thing to do so far out is save, you could change your minds ten times on venues or anything else between here and there!

Post # 9
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

“He said 2013 because he figured it was far enough out to not have to talk about it yet”

That’s what my Darling Husband said when I read him this

Post # 10
Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I would just talk to him..see what is up.  When my Fiance proposed, he was actually shocked that I wanted to set a date right away.  He was more shocked when I told him I had made a vendor apointment, the week later. He admitted to thinking I would just chill out and ‘enjoy the engagement’..not realizing that enjoying the engagement to me meant wedding planning! 

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