(Closed) What do you and your SO think are the top 5 reasons that leads to divorce

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think:

#1 Cheating  (sex life going down the drain could be a reason to cheat)

#2 Abuse, verbal and/or physical

#3 If there is an ex or kids from a previous relationship involved..i.e an ex wife

#4 Money issues

#5 When you aren’t in love

Post # 4
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

1. being unfaithful

2. money issues

3. miscommunication

4. mind changing on major issues (career, kids, travel, etc)

5. not putting each other first

Post # 5
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Well from everything I have read it seems like fighting about money is the number 1 reason people in the US get divorced. The other 4 I think in no particular order are cheating, emotional neglect, break down of communication and expectations not met.

Post # 6
Member
5179 posts
Bee Keeper

Our top:

1. Lack of communication

2. Money issues

3. Lack of commitment 

4. Adultry

5. Abuse (physical, mental, emotional)

Post # 7
Member
5784 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

1. Money

2. Lack of Communication

3. Money

4. Cheating

5. Money

Post # 8
Member
2559 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

This isn’t 5 reasons – just one, but I will always remember that my mom’s friend told her when I was little that the reason she’d had a long and successful marriage was that she & her husband had never fallen “out of love” at the same time – meaning that it would be hard sometimes to keep “that loving feeling” going, cause life gets in the way or you’re cranky or bored or fighting or stressed, but one if not both of them was always there to support and stand strong for their marriage. Reading @bride2bejc:‘s #5 “when you aren’t in love” made me think of that… 🙂 Other than that? Beating (physically or emotionally), cheating, $, and growing apart/indifference.

Post # 9
Member
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

1. CHEATING.

2. CHEATING

3. CHEATING

4. Money issues

5. I can definitely see how neglect and/or abuse would be a huge factor in this, but a lot of times it still involves CHEATING.

I am scared to death of the D-word, and Fiance and I have talked a lot about how to prevent it. Pretty much the only thing that could lead to it for us would be cheating but I don’t think that will ever be a problem (at least, I hope to GOD it never will be!!!)

Post # 10
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

1. Trust is broken (cheating, lying, stealing, general pattern of dishonesty)

2. Abuse (mental, physical, emotional)

3. Shift in priorities (this would have to be pretty severe, but as soon as one person stops putting their family first in their life, it’s not going to work)

4. Disrespect (when you no longer respect the other person, lack of civility and compassion, no consideration and deny their needs emotionally, sexually, etc.)

5. Money (again, this would have to be pretty severe. Not talking in terms of not having enough, but if someone was hiding funds, secretly shopping for high priced items, running up debt, spending on themselves while the rest of the family’s needs are being neglected)

 

Post # 12
Member
2018 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

A lot of psychologists say these four are the top reasons for divorce: criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling.  Having been married once before, I can totally agree.

Post # 14
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@MrsWrangler: I think this is so true! Something that I’ve always taken from my mom (my parents have been married for 33 years, together for over 40) is this: you don’t always have to like each other, as long as you always love each other. 

 

Post # 15
Member
2018 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@al1988: I think it’s called, appropriately enough, the Four Horsemen of the Apocolypse. lol

Post # 16
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@KatyElle: hit the most important point, I think.

Disrespect.

All of the things that have been listed before stem from a lack of respect for the other person or themselves.

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