Post # 1
5 months into my marriage, and I’m still avoiding having to call my in-laws by any name because I don’t know what to call them! I’ve asked what they would prefer, and they kindly told me: “Whatever you’re comfortable with” which is wonderful, except that doesn’t really help!
My parents will call their in-laws mom/dad, and while I love my in-laws like my own family, for some reason I feel uncomfortable calling them that. I have a hard time getting over my manners to call them by their first names, but by last name at this point sounds far too formal. I can’t make up my mind on anything!
So what do you use, and how did you choose it?
Post # 2
I just call them by their first names-it’s weird at first, I felt the same, but we’re all adults. I have my own parents, don’t need another set to call mom and dad.
Post # 3
For future Mother-In-Law I call by her name or sometimes Mama (she started this by signing off a card “mama ___ “
As for future Father-In-Law, we aren’t as close so usually his name.
Most of my married friends call their in laws by their names, seldom do I hear “mom/dad” and I can see where that’s uncomfortable! I can’t see myself doing that quite yet!
Post # 4
kiram : Early on in our relationship I always called them Mr. and Mrs. So and So. It wasn’t until two years into our relationship and after we were engaged that I began calling them by their first names. At first it was strange, but now it’s no big deal. I would feel strange still calling them Mr. and Mrs. now that were married. I doubt I’ll ever call them Mom and Dad, though my parents call their in-laws Mom and Dad too and have told my Darling Husband he can call them that if he wants…he never will Haha I’d say call them by their first names!
Post # 5
Ive always called mine by their first names so I continued to do that after marriage. Ive never heard anyone call their in-laws or bf/gfs parents by anything else in the UK, everyone just uses first names. Mom/dad feels childish to me because we are all adults and ‘Mr and mrs’ feels like a power play i.e what you call a teacher in school.
Post # 6
soontobenoone : Pretty much exactly that. My husband also avoids calling my parent’s anything!
The few times I’ve had to refer to them by a name, I’ve used their first names, so I guess I’m leaning towards that (especially after other Bee’s posts).
Even when my parents call their in-laws “mom” or “dad”, they still sound like they’re really uncomfortable when they say it, haha.
bee123456789 : I understand the “we’re all adults” thing, and I considered that too. I keep trying to imagine if I was a mother-in-law to someone, what I would like to be called…it’s pretty difficult because I don’t even have children just yet, lol…
Post # 7
Their first names.
My mom calls them by their first names, but my FIs parents called them mom/dad (passed away now). It makes me uncomfortable thinking about calling them mom/dad lol.
Post # 8
I’ve always called them by their first name, and will continue to. I only have 1 Mom and Dad. I know that’s traditional in some families but it’s not my thing.
Post # 9
haha. I just avoid calling them anything. I rarely find the need to actually address them or do anythign but look in their direction and start talking to them. If I’m talking to one about the other, then I use their first name.
Post # 10
I call my future mother in law “sama yaay” and my future father in law “mon père”, which mean “my mother” and “my father” in the languages I use to speak to them.
I would feel much less comfortable calling them mum or dad in English though. But because it’s not my first language, there’s less of an emotional connection to the words.
Post # 11
I call them by thier first names though I’m rarely in a position where I have to address them as anything.
Post # 12
kiram : To their face or behind their back!?? 😂😂😂
I’m just joking….
I like my in-laws! I call them by their first names. Husband calls my parents by their first names too. It would personally feel weird calling them Mum and Dad…
Post # 13
- Wedding: November 2015 - Ballroom
I grew up with my parents calling their in-laws by their first names, as did all of my close relatives. My in laws would LOVE IT if I called them “mom” and “dad”, but I am not even a little bit comfortable with that. I adore them, but I already have a Mom and Dad, so I call them by their first names. My husband calls my parents by their first names, too. I honestly can’t envision ever calling them anything else.
Post # 14
My in laws are Chinese and it’s expected I call them mom and dad or it’d be majorly disrespectful. Yeahhhhhh not happening. 5+ years in and I’ve managed to never call them anything
Post # 15
I call mine by their names or by nicknames or by what my kid calls them if I’m talking to him.