- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2014
I’m going to try to keep this short, without losing important details.
So, I had planned on inviting two friends from college, we will call them John and Sally, who were engaged. I have been friends with Sally longer, but have become closer with John since Sally moved away (they were long distance while he finished school, and I stayed in the university town because my FI is now a grad student here). I now am part-owner of John’s company. FI is also friends with John now, much moreso than Sally (who he has known through me, but we were long distance through school, so he didn’t really see her ever).
Like I said, John and Sally were engaged. Were being the key word. They broke the engagement about 4 months after I got engaged, so there was plenty of time for me to talk to them about the wedding. Now they don’t even speak. And while I see John several times a week and speak daily, I haven’t seen Sally (or spoken more than a few words to her) since the last time she came to visit about 3 weeks before they broke the engagement.
I will defintiely be inviting John, it just makes sense to. He’s a friend and a coworker. I am offering him a +1 since he won’t know many other people there (at least not well enough to feel comfortable). Now I am conflicted about whether or not to invite Sally. If I do invite her, I have to give her a +1. And although I hate to be selfish, I don’t want to spend nearly $300 for somebody I doubt I will see between now and the wedding (and most likely won’t see again after because she lives so far away and we really aren’t close anymore). Our guest list is already stretched to the absolute limit, so I wasn’t planning on (nor can I really fit) two more people. My main struggle is that she knows she was going to recieve an invite, but really the invite was more toward John than toward her to begin with, seeing as though I am closer to him.
So really what I am trying to ask is, am I obligated to invite Sally, even though I don’t talk to her besides the occasional facebook “like” or comment, and I certainly won’t be seeing her unless they get back together (more than highly unlikely).
Oh an if I invite Sally, I am going to get shit for not inviting Jane, who was my roommate for a year during college and Sally’s best friend. But Jane and I haven’t seen each other in 2.5 years, have barely spoken, and really didn’t end our roommateship on good terms. So those 2 more people I can’t fit/afford would turn into 4 people I can’t fit/afford/really want there.
HELP. Also, I know etiquette probably states that I have to invite her because I talked about the wedding with her, but what given the situation, what would you actually do?