Post # 1
I saw an older post that was really interesting and thought we’d start a newer one as times are always changing. What do you NOT want to happen during your proposal?
Keep in mind what one person hates another may love.
For me personally I do NOT want either family to be involved, for it to be at a restaurant and do not put my ring in food or drink!
Post # 2
most women just want him to do it already. There can be so much pressure on guys to “do it right” that they procrastinate which makes her resentful.
Post # 3
very very true but as a hypothetical is there something you really really wouldn’t want. I’ve already told him it cannot be in front of either family. I don’t want them involved it would cause me so much anxiety.
a friend of mine got proposed to at a basketball game and she hates sports and said it was great he proposed but would’ve been so much better anywhere else.
Post # 4
I do not want anyone else there – no family, no friends, no public, no photographer, and ideally minimal / no fuss. No red or pink roses (can’t stand them) and no kneeling. And no asking my father. Man I sound really demanding lol.
Post # 5
I instructed my now husband not to propose at any super public place like a restaurant.
Post # 6
I agree don’t “ask” permission. I told him he could tell them “hey I’m going to marry your daughter”. But not tell them details on when where how.
Post # 7
I didn’t want it done in public or in front of anyone (except my doughter, who requested to be present) and he respected my wishes. Although I’m sure he wouldn’t have anyways because he’s so shy.
Post # 8
We are both on the private side and we shared proposal ideas. We just got engaged while house huntimg 2 days ago. I was surprised at the random moment. It was amazing.
Post # 9
My only stipulation was for it to be done privately. I hate opening gifts in front of people period, so I couldn’t imagine getting proposed to in a public setting. I would have died from embarrassment.
Post # 10
Nobody else but us.. at least for that night!
Post # 11
We’re already married but back then he knew that I wanted it to be PRIVATE. No big spectacle, no photographer, no friends or family involved. Just the two of us. That was pretty much my only thing.
Post # 12
For it to be from the wrong person. The rest is just gravy and doesn’t matter.
Post # 13
I didn’t really have any dealbreakers to be honest. I would’ve been happy with a simple proposal at home or something more public. I did not want him to feel pressured to do the “perfect” proposal and told him as much. He did feel pressure because I think society really puts this message out there that it needs to be huge. In the end, I got a surprise proposal at the end of a hike to a beautiful lake, in front of my family while on a family trip. It was lovely and I was thrilled! I guess the only thing I wouldn’t love would be anything super scripted, like a flash mob or something he wanted to be really “viral”. But if that was his personality it would be ok! And I would’ve been fine with a restaurant proposal or proposal at a game, etc.
Post # 14
We were both on the same page with things I didn’t want/he didn’t want to do – I didn’t want him to ask my stepdad, I didn’t want him to do that thing where he says “(First, Middle, Last Name), will you marry me” because nobody ever called me by my then-full name (it’s been changed since, the entire thing!) and I just didn’t want him to feel pressured to do anything that wasn’t true to himself. But he ended up proposing at the Delta terminal dressed as a giant hot dog, so I guess I really didn’t have to worry about that last one.
Post # 15
- Wedding: February 2018 - UK
I’d hate any kind of big grand gesture, especially a public one. I’m not a romantic person at all, and I’d have felt mortified at some massive display.
We didn’t actually do a proposal at all, we just discussed it and decided to get married, but if I’d had one, I would have been happiest with something private and at home.