(Closed) What do you say to people who groan about your upcoming full mass?

posted 9 years ago in Catholic
Post # 32
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

HisIrishPrincess: LOL!!! I almost fell out of my chair laughing!

Post # 33
Member
6995 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@yassim: i had a full catholic mass and it lasted only an hour – most of my guests were family so they were prepared for the lengthy mass but those weren’t actually commented on how quickly the mass seemed to go and how lovely it was.

Post # 34
Member
5976 posts
Bee Keeper

I’m not Catholic, but being Orthodox, our ceremony was 45 minutes to an hour long. I think as long as you have something to follow along in, it shouldn’t be all that bad. Plus, it was most of my friends’ first time at my church which is an adventure in itself. There are a lot of different aspects of what’s going on, and a lot of stuff to watch for. So while there were some naysayers about how long everything was, there were plenty of people who told us how interesting it was to see.

I think you’re there for the couple, not the party…so whether it’s 15 minutes or an hour and 15 minutes, you should suck it up.

Post # 35
Member
4334 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

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@2PeasinaPod:exactly! however, unfortunately I think a lot of people honestly DO think it’s just about the party… :-/

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@HisIrishPrincess: that was HILARIOUS.

Post # 36
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

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@vmec: You can’t blame people for how they feel but you can blame people for how they choose to express those feelings. Complaining about the ceremony choice is no more polite than complaining about the food or music or anything else to the bride.

Post # 37
Member
6 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2011

My Future Mother-In-Law is the one that groaned about ours being a full mass. She said, “Oh, God! Kill me now.” What is confusing to me is how she talks about how she went to Catholic school growing up, is always talking about how she needs to be going to church with us, and baptised her children in the Catholic church. She had absolutely no problem being at Christmas eve mass, after we got engaged or going to my sister’s full mass ceremony last December.

If that’s the way she feels, I pretty much decided to exclude her and her family from being a part of the ceremony. Obviously, they are invited and will be there, but not participating. It was my last straw with her.

@hisirishprincess: LOVE IT!!!!

Post # 38
Member
2114 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

totally depends on the priest ., but lets face it ..if its one of those monotone ones that go ON and ON ..Yes it does suck ! Perhaps they will just skip the church .

Post # 39
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2012

My Fiance and I are both Catholic and the majority of the people attending will be Catholic however, he has a nice phrase for our griping friends…

You know, we Catholics, marry and bury in long ceremonies.

Then he makes some comment about how our reception will be worth it. Works for us!

Post # 40
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Ours was a full standard Catholic wedding Mass, and it was just shy of a full hour. Hey, that’s the price of dinner, Guests! You have to sit through the Mass to get to generous dinner and open bar! Wink

Post # 41
Member
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

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@Lanabug: Haha that’s funny!

Post # 42
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I feel like sometimes people think too much about the reception and not enough about the ceremony. I became catholic when I knew my Fiance was the one for me and religion has become a wonderful part of our lives. We just picked out all the readings and other details of the ceremony and I feel like the full mass is so much more special for us. If people complain I just tell them that it is important to us. Also, in our area weddings with full mass are about 1hr.

Post # 43
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

This is what I put on our website about the ceremony.  I consider it a fair warning mixed with a bit of sacrasm:

In the the presence of God, our family and our friends, we will profess our love and exchange vows in a nuptial mass at
Holy Rosary Catholic Church
Seven o’clock in the evening

Remember folks, Catholic weddings are a little longer than most. Be sure to to get a nap beforehand.
No nodding off during the nuptials!

Post # 44
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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@angeebride: Holy Rosary is a gorgeous church!  🙂

Post # 45
Member
2203 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I hate when people ask where the wedding is and I say, well we’re getting married at ABC Catholic church and the reception is at XYZ location and they say “Oh, it’s a full Catholic mass?” UM YES, yes it is and I just smile.

Not to sound preachy, but marriage is a sacrament and I believe (this is just my personal opinion) that it should be “celebrated” in the church with a full mass.

Catholic masses do not go on for 2 hours unless the priest has ALOT to say. They are generally 1hr 15min. Is that really too much time to become married? I don’t think so.

It’s your and your FI’s decision, as a couple, and the immature idiots who are laughing can just suck it up. This is where the wedding industry, I think, really warps people’s minds. Yes, you can have a short ceremony (and that is COMPLETELY fine if that’s what you want) but a traditional Catholic celebration of marriage is a full mass.

Post # 46
Member
7429 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Our ceremony was about 10 minutes long. It was short, sweet, and to the point. We are not religious, and while yes the “I DOs” are important, we wanted to celebrate with our friends and family at the reception, the same as you guys want to celebrate at Mass.  You shouldn’t put us short and sweet’ers down because we want to get to the good part – the reception, then marriage!

To me, the ceremony is a formality. Hell, you can go to the courthouse and get married in 2 minutes.  We opted to do a really meaningful reading, take a minute to remember those who couldn’t be with us, and say amazing vows. That was all we needed.  We felt it was much more important to spend as much time as possible with friends and family ,some of which we were meeting for the first time. 

Just a different perspective on why the length of the ceremony wasn’t the most important part to us

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