What do you think?

posted 8 months ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
692 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

missexcited1985 :  My SO talked about needing more money for my ring and made a big deal about the deposit he put down on the apartment when we moved in together.  This despite having a good income, investments, and a lot of savings in the bank. He continues to worry about spending money now, so it wasn’t an engagement-specific thing. I think it’s a combination of a pride thing and thinking about a house. 

It’s good that you offered to pay, so that he can’t use money as an excuse in a year. But hopefully he follows through and it doesn’t come to that!

 

Post # 18
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

missexcited1985 :  “The main concern I have, is that he tends to want to go for the biggest and best. I’m a little worried that he is working himself into a state trying to afford a huge, perfect diamond with amazing specs. “

I see a lot of guys on these boards do  this, and this would be concerning for me – a sign of bad judgment. If money is at all an issue, you shouldn’t be buying an expensive ring. I would be concerned about marrying a man who had to have “the best” to the point where he was making irresponsible financial decisions. Sorry if this is harsh…just my opinion. 

Post # 20
Member
8266 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

missexcited1985 :  

Well, this is  is a turnaround,  In one day you have gone from sounding  anxious and unsure   and talking about  dropping hints,  to  him having  the ring, all but.  

So it all worked out and you had , after  all, no need to get so defensive with those of us whose posts you deemed ‘judgmental’ or whatever.

Goodo. See you on the ring  boards. 

Post # 22
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

neverbeenstungbee :  I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Post # 23
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

missexcited1985 :  Congrats on the pending engagement bee!

However, in the future if you don’t want so much feedback on your various aspects of your relationship you shouldn’t put so much information in your post, your post was rather detailed so you can’t expect people to only comment on ONE part of it…I understand feeling like you need to give background in order to get an honest answer, but there are ways to minimize even that. When you ask for opinions from strangers they won’t always be positive. I’m sure everyone here was only trying to help in some way, granted some people could have worded things differently.

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