(Closed) What do you think?

posted 8 years ago in Christian
Post # 3
435 posts
Helper bee

Go on the vacation and have fun.  It doesn’t matter what other people think.  What people think is more an indication of them than you.  What is it you could do on vacation you couldn’t do at home anyway?  Some people just need to mind their own business!!!

Post # 4
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I think that as long as your actions reflect your beliefs, you should do what you want to do. People might think what they want, in reality, it’s not their business, and judging and gossiping is not acting in God’s way.

That being said, being away on oversees vacations is a great opportunity for temptation (depending where you are, of course – I went to Egypt with my Darling Husband a few years ago: dirty rooms with 2 single beds are not sexy!). You should definitely consider having separate rooms and some type of curfew, so that your boundaries are not just your personal will.

Post # 5
818 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

You two need to be the one’s to decide if this is appropriate for you.

It’s unfortunate that people will judge, but that’s the world we live in. Also, as Christians, we are to avoid the appearance of sin. My husband and I went camping by ourselves a few times before we were married, and a few people did comment. I just told them that he and I had set proper boundaries for our behavior before marriage and were honoring God and ourselves with those.  I didn’t mind telling people that we were waiting and were faithful to that commitment. 


Post # 6
49 posts
  • Wedding: June 2010

As long as you both know your boundaries I see no problem with it. However, I am often reminded that we are not to be a stumbling block to others and to be careful of how we present ourselves to the world. If I were you, I would let people close to me that there won’t be any physical activity(yeah, it’s not ideal to have to say it) but better to make sure they know and not imagine something else.

Post # 7
435 posts
Helper bee

I understand being careful of how we present ourselves, but it just upsets me that people can be so judgemental.  I’ve found in my life that usually those who criticize the most are the ones who should be watching what they are doing.  We need to be true to our own boundaries and beliefs without judging.

Post # 8
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Who cares what people think! You know what is in your heart and that is all that matters.

Post # 9
435 posts
Helper bee

Exactly what ksasam said!!  You know what is in your heart and that is all that matters.

Post # 10
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree you know how you are and if people assume you have sex on vacation what is stopping it from happening when you are home? I would suggest though looking into hostels that have seperate rooms for males and females becuase it would probably make you feel more comfortable.

Post # 11
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I say go and have a fabulous time! Vacays are harder to come by as time progresses (it seems to me). So GOOOOOOOOOOOO!! 🙂

Post # 13
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I had this same problem. My parents used to scowl at the idea of us traveling together but now it’s happened a few times and they kind of turn a blind eye to it. They used to ask if there would be a fold out couch or two bed in the room. Now they don’t bother. And I’ve gotten to where I’m not apologetic when telling my friends that I’m going out of town with my Fiance.

I have friends who work in ministry and are “above reproach” in their outward appearance but I know their secrets and I know that they have made some mistakes. Which is worse? I understand wanting to appear to be wholesome but at some point you just have to live your life.

Non-believers won’t get it and will assume things. That’s not really something you can avoid unless you make your sex life (or rather lack thereof) a regular topic of conversation, which is also inappropriate!

Please enjoy your vacation and know that we really respect you for your efforts to maintain your purity are really respected and appreciated by the ladies of this board! =)

Post # 15
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Hi wedding date twin!

I am sorry you are struggling with this. I know what you mean—I’ve had others assume that my Fiance and I are having an intimate relationship purely based on how long we’ve been together. I don’t like that they assume, but I know that what they think really doesn’t matter because I can’t stop them from doing so.

Don’t let those judgments stop you from living your life. Your commitment is between you and your Fiance and God—and clearly, you three are well aware of what is and isn’t going on.

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