Post # 1
my friend and i were complaining today about how it seems to now be the norm to throw a baby shower for every child you have. for instance, we have a friend who had a baby boy and threw a shower. a year later she was having a girl and threw another shower. i gave her the benefit of the doubt because they were different genders. now we have another friend who had a shower for her first two kids, now shes having twins and throwing another shower. her kids are only a year apart. my firned said she keeps seeing this happening. is this a thing everywhere?
Post # 2
It’s definitely not a thing. Sometimes people throw Sprinkles for the second or third kid, but it’s typically pretty informal.
Post # 3
It’s not the norm where I live. Sprinkles are generally accepted, but only if the new baby is a different sex than the ones previous, or if there’s a large age gap.
Post # 4
sharpshooter : wineosaur : thats what i thought! im pretty annoyed to be honest. it just comes off as greedy to me. like you JUST had a damn kid a year ago! you dont need another shower! its ridiculous!
Post # 5
- Wedding: June 2007 - City, State
alfalfasprout10518 : Tacky and greedy AF, unless you’re a Kardashian with a bazillion dollars, and especially if you throw it for yourself. No one owes you anything.
I’m on my 4th child, spaced 3 years apart. All girls. Donated almost everything from my 3rd child to a family with a newborn who lost everything in a fire and sold the rest. I have about $1k worth of stuff to buy for this baby because I legit have nothing. But I sure as shit am not asking anyone for free handouts! Some females are like this though. With my first, I didn’t really have a real shower, but people were generous and we got most essentials via gift or cash, and then supplemented after. I really don’t understand this mentality. I would not attend as a guest.
Post # 6
I’ve noticed this becoming a big thing in my area (midwest) too. And it’s RIDICULOUS!!!!! I see it as a complete money grab.
Post # 7
alfalfasprout10518 : throwing yourself a shower is bad enough, but second showers (regardless of gender differences) are super tacky imo. Save your crap from the first kid! Thankfully I’ve never been invited to one, but I would definitely decline and not send gift.
Post # 8
I hate baby showers in general and didn’t have one and try not to attend any. I think they are very counting chickens.
Also don’t get the need to have one if you have a different sex of baby second time. But then I was team yellow with both mine so all our big things and newborn clothes are gender neutral
Post # 9
I too hate baby showers. Having a baby shower after your first baby is so tacky
Post # 10
So from what I’ve read on different pregnancy boards…it seems like people have different views on this depending on who you think a baby shower is intended to be for. Those who think it’s one and done think that a shower is intended to celebrate a woman becoming a mom for the first time- which only happens once, so you only get one shower. (This is the more traditional etiquette rule and the camp I fall into as well.)
Then you have the other side of people who say the baby shower is for the baby itself and “every baby should be celebrated!” which I can understand the reasoning behind but I still think you only get one. What really baffles me are the ones who say “it’s not a gift grab, we tell people not to bring gifts.” Well then throw a party but don’t call it a “shower” then, because shower means gifts!
Post # 11
No we didn’t do this for our two and wouldn’t for another but that doesn’t mean it isn’t done iether. I know tons of friends who have had a shower for each baby and they relatively close in age that you’d think the item was still in use when the next came into existence.
Post # 12
Not a thing here. My friends offered to throw me a shower for my second but I declined. My work friends absolutely insisted that it wasn’t about gifts, it was about celebrating the new baby, so I had to concede on the condition that it would be a sprinkle! It was very sweet.
My friends (and I) are the sorts who would get any new baby in our circle a thoughtful gift anyway, shower or not.
Post # 13
I have so much shit from my first I can’t imagine even WANTING a second shower. Please for the love of god, no more stuff at my house.
I think a little get together at a restaurant or something to celebrate the baby is fine.
Post # 14
In my hometown circle of friends it’s a 1/mother thing. Maybe if there’s a big gap between kids there’ll be a second shower, but usually just one.
In my new friend group, it appears to be a 1/baby thing, which is hard to get used to, and does seem a bit grabby when babies are close together or the same gender. My personal solution to that is to just bring a smaller gift to the second shower. A book or two, one little outfit, etc.
Post # 15
This is starting to be a thing where I’m from (socal). I think it’s tacky and I’m not really a fan of first time showers.