(Closed) What do you think of the Duggars and families like them?

posted 5 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 106
Member
3277 posts
Sugar bee

FreshBakedPi:  You’re right Michelle doesn’t “parent” anyone anymore.  I am sure in the begining she did, but the older girls really do everything.  Michelle has said she cares for newborns until they aer 6 months old, and then she weans them so she can get pregnant again.  They are then passed off to their buddy who takes care of the night time wakings/feedings/diapering.

Also anyone who doesn’t show enough joyful countenance is shipped off to an ATI approved work camp called ALERT.  Josiah is there now, and has been for quite some time.  Girls get shipped off to Journey into the Heart (or Of the heart), for some more brainwashing/tortue.  For some it is probably preferable to being at home, and may not hate getting sent. 

And for people who report being so modest, they sure let the show air footage of Anna birthing a baby on the toilet.  Ain’t anything modest about that.

Post # 107
Member
1521 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

OtterHalf:  That book IS crazy! It was an interesting read, but a difficult one. The first half of the book was on Amazon, and I will probably get it from the library sometime to finish it. 

The view and treatment of the women and girls really gets to me too. The idea that the only option that they have is to get married and reproduce is sad. Yes, some of them were able to go do some education, but that ends once they get married.

One of the many things that bugs me about the Duggars, is the kids never get any privacy! They are always chaperoned or has a buddy. They can never do anything by themselves. I understand that it’s the idea of accountability, but do they not trust their kids? As an introvert, I would find that exhausting!!

I was thinking last night about the show and the money that they are making from TLC. Do the kids (especially the adult children) get their share of the profits, or does it all go to the parents?

andielovesj:  After looking into the Duggars, ATI and Gothard, the Pearls’ names keep coming up. I’ve read reviews of their books and excerpts. And that is some scary stuff! 

LoggerHead91207:  I agree whole heartedly with your last statement, that I feel sorry for the Duggar kids who have never known anything else. They are brought up to believe that that is the only way to live, and not given the education or critical thinking skills to ever question it.

Post # 108
Member
998 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

mildlybookish:  After reading that book (and other articles/research/etc.) on their lifestyle it ANGERS me when I read comments from people saying they like the show, or respect the “wholesomeness” of their values. I have to believe it is just bc they do not know how f*cked up it all is, and how repressed the Duggar girls really are. Sure they seem happy…bc they aren’t allowed to show any other feelings!! I mean, someone cannot possibly know all this information and still like them…right?!?!?

Post # 109
Member
1521 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

OtterHalf:  Very true, and all under the umbrella of religious freedom. (Which I know is a hot debate, which I don’t want to get into).

For a while, I got into reading articles and blog post on “No Longer Quivering.” The stories of those who were in this lifestyle and were able to get out…. I grew up in a conservative church and I recognize some of the ideology and the rhetoric from my childhood. I’m very thankful that the church that I grew up in and my parents were never that extreme! 

On a personal note, I love education. I’m pursuing a Master’s degree. The idea that someone could tell me that I wasn’t allowed to learn or to pursue higher education because of my gender makes my blood boil. 

Post # 110
Member
367 posts
Helper bee

I didn’t read every comment, so I don’t know if this has already been touched on, but I wonder if they would have been able to raise their kids without assistance if they didn’t have a TV show. Anybody know?

Post # 111
Member
1646 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

LoveAndLaughter:  Before the show come along I think they had 13 or 14 kids already. They were working on building their current home, but lived in a very small and cramped home. Michelle and Jim Bob have spoken about struggling to make ends meet. For all his faults, Jim Bob is an incredibly hard worker and I have no doubt that he did the absolute best he could to provide for them. However, it wasn’t easy and the did struggle a lot. The tv show came along at a good time for them.

There are a lot of ATI families who aren’t that fortunate. They believe that God wants them to have tons of kids, but they are discouraged from pursuing higher education and their wives are told that they have to stay home with the kids. That means the vast majority of these families are unable to comfortably provide for their families.

Would they be as financially well-off as they are now without the show? Probably not. However, I doubt that they would be in poverty as severe as some other ATI families are.

Post # 112
Member
1646 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

mildlybookish:  Exactly. For people who think it over carefully and decide that this is the right lifestyle for them – that is fine with me. It isn’t a choice I would make, but if it is right for them and they know about all the options out there then thats fine.

The Duggar kids have never been afforded that option. Yes, the show has exposed them to the wider world to a certain extent, as has social media. But they are never alone and never allowed to experience that wider world without a sibling or family member present. As such, they continue to live in the carefully insulated world that their parents have created for them.

I understand why their parents did this. They are deeply religious and they honestly believe what they are doing will protect their kids – not just in this world, but in the next. It’s just incredibly sad to me that in making these choices out of love they have also ensured their children are never able to explore who they are as individual people.

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