Post # 1
Got married on the 19th and about a day after I finally realized what marriage means to me: When I get the priviledge to spend the rest of my life upholding my wedding vows to him every day.
Three things struck me. One is since we lived together already/joint account/finances/etc., I thought not much would change, but it just feels … different (and a great different!). It’s so weird to hear someone say “my wife” ha 🙂 And I’m still getting used to having a new name (and whoever said changing your name was so easy it almost did itself… not! Went to the bank and they won’t change my name even with the certified marriage license unless I do my driver’s license first and won’t be able to do that until we get back from the honeymoon.
I get to spend the rest of my life with my soulmate 🙂
Post # 2
This is so wonderful to hear. Congratulations!!!
Post # 3
Congratulations on becoming a wife! Hope you have a wonderful honeymoon and enjoy the start of this new chapter in your life.
Marriage to me means partnership and unity. Being there for the other but also giving each other space to grow.
Spending time together also helps a lot. When I’m working (currently on maternity leave) and Darling Husband is working we hardly see each other due to working opposite shifts and that can be tough. We know the importance of spending time together, which can be tricky with a 3 month old
Post # 4
To me, marriage is a lifetime (as long as we both shall live) covenant partnership involving God and my husband, one in which my husband and I have been joined by God and are now considered to be “one flesh,” as, spiritually speaking, the “two have become one.”
Marriage has not only legal benefits that are bestowed by the authority of the government but also spiritual, emotional, and physical benefits as well. As my pastor said at the conclusion of our ceremony, “Something new has just been created that has never existed before.” To me, that is very cool.
About three decades ago, I heard and read a definition of what marriage should be for two Christians (which my Darling Husband and I both are), and I loved it and never forgot about it. I included this as part of what I said when my Darling Husband and I each spoke to each other before the pastor led us through our traditional vows:
“Christian married love is the persistent effort on the part of two people to create for each other the circumstances in which each can become the person God intended him or her to be — a better person than he or she could have become alone.” (quote from psychologist Richard Dobbins.)
I love the idea of being in a committed (legally and spiritually speaking) lifetime partnership, in which we each have roles and responsibilities, that is designed to benefit our relationships with God, other people, and each other.
Post # 5
gatordeb: congrats on your marriage!
We got married dec 14. We already had been living together a year and a half, and when we got engaged nothing felt different, so I assumed married life would be the same. About a week leading up to the wedding I started feeling even closer to him than I did before. Now after the wedding I feel even closer still, and also more aware of working on/protecting what we have.
To me, marriage is picking someone to walk through life with. He is my partner, my person.
Post # 6
I replied earlier and now realize that I completely forgot to congratulate you on your marriage! Congratulations! I hope marriage turns out to be all that you and your Darling Husband hoped for and more.
Post # 7
This is a tough one for me…I’m engaged and not yet married so maybe my opinion will change. Currently excluding certain legal rights and obligations marriage does not have a meaning. Socially, I see the benefits of being married, but otherwise I’d be content to be a Fiance. I’m not religious, so marriage doesn’t have a spiritual meaning either. I love my Fiance and I’m committed to him without being married. We already live together and he’s my beneficiary for most of my accounts. And I’ve gone back and forth about changing my name (which unless he’s willing to change his, it probably won’t happen). Weirdly, when we first met I told him I wanted to be engaged within 2-3 years of living together. For me engagement (w/ a ring) is a bigger commitment than actually being married. I know my Fiance wouldn’t spend x amount of money on something he doesn’t care about if he weren’t truly committed to making our relationship work. Anyway long ramble but I’m still trying to conceptualize being married.
Post # 8
To me marriage is a partnership where you choose to be each other’s biggest supporter. It’s about sticking through the good times and the not so great times even when things get hard. It’s about loyalty and mutual respect. It’s about compromise and saying you’re sorry even when you don’t want to. it’s about a connection deeper than any other.
Post # 9
gatordeb: i’m with you! dh and i lived together for years before getting married so i didn’t expect to feel different, but i totally did!
Post # 10
To me, marriage is a lifetime commitment of choosing your soulmate every day. I don’t believe in “your soulmate is out there, you just have to find them”, I think it is a decision. You find someone who you love and who you are compatible with and you decide to make them your soulmate with marriage. Every time you fight and choose to let it go or apologize or compromise, you are acting on that decision. Deciding to work through your issues and compromise and have common goals and fix your own behaviors for the good of your relationship, in my opinion, is what makes a marriage (or any relationship). The concepts of marriage and soulmates are really only ever as strong as the people making those vows to each other.