What happened between you and your ex best friend that ended the friendship?

posted 1 year ago in The Lounge
Post # 31
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

I went from very good friends/hanging out pretty often to still being friends but not seeing her much because of her boyfriend. Who unfortunately became her husband. I couldn’t stand to be around him, and not just me but none of our friends. He was horrible. And all they did was drink. Luckily he’s now an ex-husband!!! But she still drinks as much, just with another single friend instead. But we’re all SO glad they got divorced. But our friendship will never be like it was. And that doesn’t bother me. Had another best friend where we just slowly drifted apart. She got married and I was still living the single life and after years that didn’t mesh anymore. That one doesn’t bother me either, it felt natural. But now I’ve had the same BFF for about 10 years and I don’t see how we’d ever break apart! 

Post # 32
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

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meganbee96 :  yeah I regret how my friendship with my ex best friend of 13 years ended in high school. Our parents were best friends, we holidayed together and it was awesome. We drifted apart because I was in an abusive and controlling relationship and she got closer to my other close friend as a result, and then she slept with said close friend’s boyfriend. That friend thought she and her bf were both waiting to lose their virginity together and that my ex best friend was the sweetest girl. 

I eventually spilled the beans it must have been 18 months later. Unsurprisingly, those two remained close friends and cut me off for being such a bitch. I wish I’d been a nicer person back then. 

Post # 33
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

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0queenbee0 :  

I read that thread! Since you say you’ve never talked to her again, I assume she never tried to get back in touch or reconcile? Did they end up getting married? 

Post # 35
Member
197 posts
Blushing bee

I was always the one making the effort. It was never her trying, always me. We finished high school and maintained a good friendship until around 3 years out of school. She went to uni and I continued working full time. Which was fine. But it got to the point where she’s be on a semester break and would catch up with all our other friends except me. I invited her to lunch one day and she told me that she was busy studying at home and then I went to the lunch spot anyway as I was hungry and local to it and I saw her there having lunch with our mutual friends. It seems silly and petty now but after that I just distanced myself from her. About a year ago she followed me on Instagram and I followed her back. She got married and I congratulated her but the friendship isn’t there and I don’t think it will ever return. 

It was hard at first as I was upset at someone I’d known for 15 years who didn’t give a rats about me but I have better friends now. I have zero hate and if she reached out I’d respond but I’m not interested in driving the friendship again. 

This was around 6 years ago too. 

Post # 36
Member
649 posts
Busy bee

Last big fall out I had was with a friend who I knew from high school and was friends with part of college. She was in love with my cousin but casually sleeping with and ended up dating my roommate. I stayed out of it the whole time but the roommate’s ex was a childhood friend of mine (small town) and I took her over one night and he ended up cheating on her very early on in the relationship and she blamed me for it, of course. I honestly didn’t even notice when she stopped talking to me because I was so tired of it all and my mom had just been diagnosed with breast cancer so I was more focused on dealing with that privately than on her self inflicted soap opera drama and it wasn’t until my other roommate told me that I even found out. She wasn’t and still isn’t worth confronting over but I was salty because I know she spent time talking bad about me to all our mutual friends. The real ones saw through it (including her boyfriend who I’m still friends with on all social media) but she was always so good at making everyone feel bad for her which looking back was a big reason I was friends with her for as long as I was. They have a baby and are still together as far as I know and he likes all of my relationship/enagagment/etc. related posts so if he’s happy for me I can be happy for him but FUCK her, lol.

Post # 37
Member
77 posts
Worker bee

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binpink :  

 

 

Nope. Never tried to get in touch and yes they did got married… 

Post # 38
Member
77 posts
Worker bee

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strawberrysakura :  

 

thank you. It really sucked to lose a friend this way but, I believe  Karma will get them 

Post # 39
Member
2231 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

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0queenbee0 :  omg your ex friend and her fiance are so wrong on so many levels

Post # 40
Member
832 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

She attempted suicide twice, neither were serious attempts (pills only in hand then hose to exhaust pipe with car outdoors and fresh air from outside circulating).  Both times she basically said I wasn’t a good friend.  She certainly blamed other things in her life, but both times she made sure to let me know how I had failed her.  I just couldn’t anymore.

Post # 41
Member
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2029

beejeany :  That kind of non friendship does weigh on self esteem and good on you for distancing yourself.  Walking away isn’t petty.  I had that situation myself and I wish I walked away sooner.  One time I called my “friend” in tears because I failed a pre test (I studied for it like crazy) for a class.  She couldn’t even spare a minute to comfort me over the phone.  She also promised to study w/me beforehand which never came to fruition.  Texthing her was futile, she never had time for me and promised to spend new year’s w/me.  She ended up ditching me to go to a bar w/her partner and other friends.  We fell out and she asked me if we wanted to stay friends, but I said no and haven’t talked to her since.  I was suffering from extremely low self esteem at that point and no one was there for me.

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meganbee96 :  I wouldn’t change anything.  I forgive all these people, but never want to deal w/them again.

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