- 4 years ago
So, a few of you bees, especially the waiting bees may remember my post from a month ago (If I were clever enough this would be the point where I would add a link so said post. But I’m not!)
Long story short. I walked out on my 4.5 year relationship because deep down I realised that my SO was never going to comit to me, and in order to find my Prince Charming (Ok, not Prince Charming because I am not sure that he exists, so how about, Prince Not-a-total-Douche-bag?) I would need to set myself free and therefore be open to one day meeting someone new. Who would want to commit to me and would want the same things as I do, you know, like those totally radical things like marraige and babies. I mean, how can you expect to meet Prince Not-a-total-Douche-bag when you are shacked up with Mr TOTAL DOUCHE-BAG.
Well, after a day of tears, packing up Ex’s crap and him moving out a few days later, I was on the road to recovery, lol. I bought some nice things (floral bedding and generally girly crap – because I could!) for MY flat to reinvent it from what was formally OUR flat. So, it took a couple of days to get used to coming home to just the cats for company, but my family and friends (and you bees!) were amazing and provided support and company when I needed it.
Suprisingly though, I felt pretty damn good after only a few days (a pretty telling sign that not all was ok and hadn’t been for a very long time) So, like literally after a few days of being single and I had picked myself up and dusted myself off and was ready to find someone to have a future with.
Now there will be two schools of thought on this:
A) OMG! What the heck, this girl is rebounding like a mo’fo
B) Wow, this girl knows what she wants and wants to go and get it, go sister!!!!
Well, I obviously subsbribe to the school of thought that I know what I want, and life is too bloody short to muck about. Now if I was sat at home crying into a tub of Ben and Jerrys, rocking back and fourth wearing the same PJ’s for the third day straight, I would not have done what I did next….
I signed up to Eharmony. I thought, well out of interest, let’s see who is out there. I figured it would take weeks or maybe months for me to find someone I would be interested in dating, and probably a few terrible dates before I would find someone to potentially have a future with. Well, a few days into Eharmony I got matched with a very interesting person that ticked a lot of boxes for me and seemed to have a very simular attitude to life. I thought, screw it and directly emailed him via the site. Bold move as most people tend to start with icebreakers etc etc. Well, my bold move worked and this obviously ticked a box for him. He sent me back a massive email. A week went by of constant emailing and texting. How I got any work done that week I do not know! We had each other in stitches and the banter was great but we were also discussing some pretty deep serious things, and do you know what, it didn’t feel weird at any point.
Well, we figured it was going so well we would arrange a date. I out right told him I could’n’t be arsed with getting tarted up and going to some posh place for dinner as I would only be more nervous etc. So we settled on the zoo. Public and safe, fun, things to be distracted by if the date sucked. Anyway, during our planning I shared with him my theory of dating. I said, that it would make much more sense if a date started with a kiss. That way, if it sucked you could just go home, lol, and also it would help get rid of nerves. Well, he liked my theory so much, he thought that it was so maverick and if things worked out between us, would make a good tale for the grandkids.
So… that’s excatly what happened. We met at the zoo, got out of our respective cars and he grabbed me and snogged me in the middle of the car park. Nerves GONE!. We had a fantastic date that progressed from the zoo (2 laps!) to lunch then dinner. 12 hours in total. It was literally the best day ever. We had a few more dates and are now “together” – I feel so blessed to have found someone who gets me, and who wants the same things from life as me. I keep my fingers crossed that it goes well and I will one day rejoin the waiting list… but do you know what? Even if it doesn’t, it has given me faith that there are some wonderful men out there, and reassured me that I don’t look like the arse end of a bus ha ha!
So. To all you bees who supported me in my first few days of singledom, I salute you. To any bees who aren’t happy and are thinking of walking- do you know what?, as terrifying as it is, it may just turn out to be the best thing you ever did.