- 5 years ago
- Wedding: February 2014
For me, it’s been dealing with my mother.
In the grand scheme of things, I don’t have it that bad. She’s not abusive or absent, she’s just unsupportive. Soon after I got engaged, she began a whirlwind relationship – the first relationship she’s had in 15 years (since her and my dad split up). I’ve constantly had to compete with her travel plans to see him (they were initially long distance) … She’s very absent minded, so when I’ve checked a date with her constantly and booked something for it (dress shopping, tastings, showers/stagette, etc.), she’s fine with the date at first and then in casual conversation, she’ll say “Oh, ___ and I are going here on such and such a date.” Which just so happens to always land on a date I have already cleared with her! I’m just sick of hearing, “Anything I can do to support you and make this less stressful.” only to be stood up and made more stressed! She is contributing a lot financially to the wedding, but beyond that, she hasn’t been very supportive. I suppose I had high hopes because I’m her only daughter and I’m the first one out of my family (I have three other brothers) to get married.
She called to back out of yet another event (my stagette – I’ve only been to a few where the mothers of the bride and groom weren’t there) after I had a horrible day at work (nearly lost a patient) and was going to have an invasive medical test done on myself the next day, and then tries to guilt me into feeling bad for her because “she’s trying so hard and she’s having a sh*tty time too.” I just don’t have it in me to be there for her too, I have a lot going on in my life (we’re moving by the end of the month, our wedding is in a month and a half, I have health issues that they’re trying to find a cause for).
I’m just bummed out today.
Misery loves company!