Post # 1
Im just wondering.I have no ex’s so my Fiance has no worries about that.But he does.
We are not planning on having ex’s at our wedding,but at one point he did have one of his ex’s as a friend on facebook.Have to admit that I did mind,especially when we got engaged.My Fiance and I did talk and he is no longer facebook friends with her.Even had her blocked because she kepted on sending a friend request to him.
I see no reason y anybody would want to be friends with an ex.U are getting married and are moving forward.Y bring your past with you?I dont know.I just dont think its a good idea.
What do u gain from having an ex as a friend still??If I did, it would keep on bringing up memories of the relationship,especially the intimate parts.So y put yourself and yourself through that?
And if u or your Fiance are still friends with ex’s,in person or on facebook,are u both in agreement or do one of u not agree??Honestly,how comfortable are u both about it??
Y cant u or your Fiance let this person go?I honestly beleive that if u or your Fiance is uncomfortable with each other having ex’s as friends,u should respect your future spouses feelings and just let these people go……..
Post # 3
I have two exes on facebook but both were short term high school relationships where we became close friends after. There is a very good chance one if not both will be invited to my wedding.
Mr. A has an ex on facebook that he dated ten years ago. I’m totally find with that as well.
If he was still fb friends with his ex wife I’d be annoyed however.
Post # 4
@SoontobeMrsA:Thats great.As long as u both are okay with it.
Post # 5
Neither of us invited exes to the wedding, but it wasn’t really an issue because we had our wedding across the country from where we actually live. I don’t think we would have because there’s a big difference (at least in my mind) between being someone’s friend on FB and having them be a part of your wedding day.
Both of us have exes as Facebook friends because neither of us has ever been in a really messy breakup before. Both of us dated people we were friends with first and broke up with amicably. In both of our cases, the people we dated ended up having different goals and leading very different lives than what we wanted to live and there’s really no bitterness.
We have a lot of trust in each other. By having his ex as his friend on Facebook, I don’t feel like our relationship is somehow jeopardized. I obviously would have an issue with it if he chatted with her or messaged with her all the time, but it’s just kind of interesting to see what people from your past are up to. And I know he wouldn’t ever meet up with her for a dinner date or something crazy like that.
One of my exes was also a childhood friend that ended up marrying a friend of mine long after we were together, so I like to see what they’re up to and I honestly wish the best for him without missing him as a significant other.
I think it truly depends on what the relationship with the ex was like, how it ended, and what your partner is comfortable with. If it made my SO uncomfortable, I wouldn’t have a problem with deleting my exes from FB, but we just don’t really consider it to be an issue.
Post # 6
@brideatbeach:True,the relationship does matter.My Fiance told me that the reason he and this girl broke up is because she was cheating on him.So obviously she has no morals at all.I once asked my Fiance y would u even want to be her friend with what she did to you??I honestly dont remember his response,but shortly after that she was off his list.
And plus since she is so immoral and nuts,I dont want her to know anything about my Fiance and I.Knowing what this woman is like,who would!?
Post # 7
Another thing that sucks is she works at the store that I have shopped at since I was 13.I would go to another one of the same stores in the area,but the rest are mostly ghetto.
Post # 8
I have 2 exes on FB that are dear friends. I love them as friends and would never want to be involved with them again. It’s not like we hang out and talk on the phone but we’re still friendly. I’m an adult, I can have whoever I want to in my life. I chose Darling Husband, not them.
Oh and yes, my Darling Husband has an ex on his facebook too as they have a child together. She’s remarried now.
Post # 9
@Earlybride: Your fingers are typing through my brain because I feel the same way you do.
My boyfriend (lol, he’s my husband now) at the time had 2 of his ex’s on FB. They both cheated on him! He didn’t defriend them becuase he’s too nice! SERIOUSLY?? They got blocked real quick after I explained that these were not friends (facebook or otherwise!!).
When one of them got married and wanted Darling Husband at her reception after her Destination Wedding abroad, he wanted me, his new girlfriend, to go with him. No way in hell! I mean, to watch this chick hug him and push her boobs up against his chest all the while knowing she cheated on him? I don’t care if she was newly married to someone else, just the thought of her cheating on my husband made my blood boil.
I didn’t go and neither did he.
My husband is the nicer one of both of us. I guess I follow that old saying exs are exs for a reason.
Post # 10
He is still friends with an ex, on facebook and in real life. We did not invite her to our wedding because we think it’s not appropriate (I wouldn’t want to be getting married and know that one of our guests is thinking “it could have been me”).
When we first started dating, they were friends and would see each other from time to time; then when we got more serious, he introduced us (we already knew each other from a common sport, but never spent time with her out of the club). Her and I got along great. Then they only saw each other with me there; and more time passed between each meeting.
I think two persons can fail at having a relationship because they’re not right for each other and that with some level of maturity, may maintain a friendship. When we started dating, Darling Husband offered to stop seeing her if I wasn’t comfortable with it, and all I said was, just don’t give me any reason to feel uncomfortable and we won’t have a problem.
Of course, as anyone, I would sometimes have insecurities about it, I was honest and we talked it out. No crisis. And over time, as our relationship evolved, their friendship evolved too, in a sense that she has stepped away and we see her about twice a year..
When it comes to exes, I think as long as clear boundaries are respected, it can work, it all depends on the situation and the people involved.
Post # 11
@KatyElle:Thats great.Im glad it has worked out for u two.
@Just_Squeeze:In the same boat huh?lol…crazy.Y be friends with cheating ex’s?!
Post # 12
(When it comes to exes, I think as long as clear boundaries are respected, it can work, it all depends on the situation and the people involved.)
Thats it in a nutshell.It all depends on what your exs are like,how the relationship ended and the people invloved.
Post # 13
@Earlybride: It has, and thank you 🙂
Post # 14
If she was trying to re-friend him after she was deleted? Good on him for blocking her.
Fiance has one girl that he dated in highschool and she herself is engaged and lives far away. The other ex is his ex wife and she is blocked. But they were not friends since we were together anyways. It is just that they have some mutual friends left and it’s just easier to block her so she can’t see photos and stuff. She cheated on him and black mailed him for money by threatening to take away his pension after he dumped her for catching her screwing around. Ya she’s a gem!
Post # 15
We had a no exes at the wedding policy. Since we are both friends with exes neither of us care about FB.
Post # 16
I have almost the exact opposite opinion on wether to be friends with exes or not. I feel like if you liked someone as a person enough to consider them your partner, why would you stop being friends with them just because a romantic relationship wasn’t in the cards? As long as it’s an ex who didn’t wrong me in any unforgivable way (cheating, physical abuse, etc) I usually maintain a friendship with them.
I actually had a boyfriend who hated that I am very close friends with my high school boyfriend, and I wound up resenting him for it. I felt like he didn’t trust me, and also that he didn’t aprove of my having a good connection to my past. My past is my past, why should I be made to feel shameful or bad about it? Eventually we broke up, and that contributed to it. It wasn’t that I picked a friendship with my ex over him, it was the way the his disaproval and what it implied to me that I couldn’t deal with.
My current SO made very good friends with my ex almost immediately when we started dating. We hang out with this ex and his present girlfriend all the time, and the four of us have a solid friendship. They’ll definitely be welcome at our wedding when we have one.