(Closed) What have you rationalized…

posted 11 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
Member
25 posts
Newbee

For us, it’s lighting. 

We went to friends’ wedding with beautiful uplighting, flood lighting, etc. The lighting made the room very warm and welcoming. We knew then we just had to have lighting.  We ended up redoing our whole budget and cutting cost elsewhere to be able to afford lighting. 

Post # 4
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Our GUESTS!!  Lol.  We wanted to have about 80 people but the guest list just keeps growing.  We have 110 on the guest list right now so I’m expecting we’ll have at least 90 attend.

We’ve managed to stay within budget on everything else though, even saving money on some categories like flowers.  We’re not going to have the huge, impressive florals I dreamed about but I realized I would way rather have $500 extra dollars for our honeymoon than spend it on bigger bouquets that will die in a week.

Post # 5
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

For me, it was my dress.  It was hella expensive (to me; I know there are prob’ly girls out there who spent more), so much so that I didn’t even include it in the wedding budget; it was something that was on my personal budget.  I mean, thousands for a dress (well, and undies, accessories and shoes) you’ll wear once….geeaaakkk….!

I rationalized it by saying that 1) our pictures are forever, so if I didn’t love my dress, I’d always be sad when I saw the pictures; 2) it was custom, handmade from kimono fabric and therefore absolutely one-of-a-kind; 3) when I looked at other dresses, they were running "only" (ha ha) $500-700 less, and after having them shipped, altered, etc., they would be nearly as much, and not one of a kind; 4) my Maid/Matron of Honor (who works for a bridal shop) pointed out I was getting super quality material, and any dress that cost less would likely be made of inferior stuff; 5) the designer and dressmaker are local, so I’m supporting the local industry and not a sweat shop in Asia; 6) it’s a work of art (see rationale #2) and you can’t put a price on art!

Boy, can I rationalize or what?!  I also have claimed that I will throw an anniversary party and wear this dress every year. My hubs thinks this is dumb, but he was very supportive and even helped me rationalize by saying I’d wanted this dress for a decade, I deserved to have it and that all my reasons made sense.

Post # 6
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2008

STATIONARY!  I spent so much on this (50 invites only!)-I cannot utter the price out loud.  Custom letterpress… All the pieces are so beautiful though… (once in a lifetime- that’s the rationalization)…

Post # 8
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2008

Yup. That will happen.  But I won’t throw mine out.  In fact, I definitely will have a copy of all the stationary in a shadow box somewhere in the apartment. 

It really just depends on your limits.  For example, I opted to have 1 color letterpress programs and menus (simple rectangle cards) in addition to the Save-The-Date Cards and invites.  I really wanted to have fan programs (2 color letterpress), but the cost was going to be double for 50 fans!  So I didn’t do them.  But this isn’t a budget constraint, it’s a personal constraint. So that’s what I mean about limits.

 For me, the stationary is a part of the presentation of my wedding.  But that’s not the case for everyone.

rationalization…"ONCE IN A LIFETIME."

 

Post # 9
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2008

the number of guests!  we wanted very small…like 50… the list now sits at 102.. yes, thats double… I just can’t cut anyone else out..

Rationalization: the reason we are not eloping is because we wanted to have a kick-ass party with our friends and family… so, if i can’t invite them all, then why am i doing this again? and it was crazy to begin with to think we could limit our number and exclude some good friends.. i should have known i couldn’t do that..

Post # 10
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

I think I am one of the number of guest people.

I got my dress for $250, because I knew I wanted something really simple, and because it just seemed silly to me to spend a ton of money on something I’d wear once.
Both my fiance and I are graphic designers, so we are definately NOT paying someone to have them done.  
I plan on having a simple meal, but a good one.  We are going for a pasta buffett, with a couple different sauces and pastas.  I think it is a really universal thing, but also really cost effective.
We are having 200 guests (we’d have more but the venue can’t have more if we want dancing).  My brother just got married and out of his 120 guests, less than 20 of them were my family members.  None of the cousins were invited, and my mom was really, really hurt by this.  She tried offering to pay for them, and he just wouldn’t budge.  I feel that while I don’t want to just let my mom choose, weddings are no place for ill feelings!
There was a lot of bad feelings and upset people at my brother’s wedding.  I’d rather have a lot of guests so there is room for my parents to invite whoever they want, my fiance’s parents to, and then still have space for everyone my fiance and I want to invite.

Post # 11
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2007

 

Photography is by far our biggest expense.  We haven’t finished our budget but I’m guessing our photographer is going to end up being about 65%.  I bought my dress on e-bay, going DIY with the flowers and I’m using a gocco for the invites but I refuse to have crappy pictures!  I was able to justify the higher end photographer by the fact that is going to be the last time my family will be together- my Mom has terminal cancer and my sister is flying in from Australia.

PrincessK- I love your idea of wearing the dress once a year.  I read a story about a group of friends that get together once a year and hang out in their wedding dresses. 

Post # 12
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2007

Our biggest expense has been the honeymoon. Since we are already married, (we eloped the 1st time!), we wanted to have the awesome pictures and family together, but our biggest is the honeymoon. We wanted a killer vacation, without having to hold anything back. We are going to Puerto Rico for two full weeks, staying at some of the nicest resorts, and plan to do everything (and anything) we want.

For example, I plan to go to one of the world’s renowned spas and splurge.

Don’t get me wrong, the actual ceremony-reception part is going to be nice, but the honeymoon is going to blow it away!!!

 

Post # 13
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2007

i’ll second what someone else said — guests! the invite list was much larger than we had initially planned… then we got the nice buffet & paid for extra open bar.  Woulda skimped a bit more on the food/drinks (or the invite list) if I knew so many of my parents friends would give cheap gifts… yes I’m being selfish, but we paid for the wedding ourselves.

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