(Closed) What if he died tomorrow? :(

posted 12 years ago in Relationships
Post # 47
Member
5284 posts
Bee Keeper

I hate to think about this but I do. fiance doesnt want me to bring this up ever but I still have it lingering in the back of my mind. I think if my fiance died I would die too..emotionally I dont think I would ever recover cause it took me this long to find him and he is my perfect match and soul mate

Post # 48
Bee
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012 - Franklin Plaza

I try not to think about it, but I know that I would move back with my parents until I was able to pick up the pieces. I have some friends here, but my job isn’t THAT great and there would be no reason to stay if he wasn’t here. *shudders*

Off to go look at pictures of kittens now. 😉

Post # 49
Member
788 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I honestly do not know what I would do. The reality of never seeing him alive again, and never having him in my daily life again – just the thought devastates me. I cannot rationally think about how I would carry on if he passed away.

Post # 50
Member
1575 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Of course I would be sad, but life would go on. I am financially able to pay the mortgage and other bilsl and still run the cat sanctuary. FH and I are in our 50s, so we have been building up our retirement funds, life insurance policies, etc.

Post # 51
Member
1575 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Of course I would be sad, but life would go on. I am financially able to pay the mortgage and other bills and still run the cat sanctuary. FH and I are in our 50s, so we have been building up our retirement funds, life insurance policies, etc.

Post # 52
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee

I am a widow, and my fears came true almost 3 years ago when my seemingly healthy husband was struck by H1N1 and died of a pulmonary embolism. We have 4 young kids togehter…he was 29. 

Grief affects everyone differently, there is no right or wrong way or certain way anyone does it. For me, I did what I had to do. I took care of my kids as best as I could, and i just put one foot in front of the other.  I had no other choice, i couldn’t lock myself in my room and cry because my kids needed a mommy.  

What I can say is this…

1) GET LIFE INSURANCE. more than you think you’ll need.  This has saved me

2) talk about death and your wishes before your spouse passes away…so glad we did this too

3) It’s OK to cry, scream, not eat, whatever.  Grief has no rhyme or reason to it.

4) Go to the social security office…if you have young kids, you may qualify for survivors benefits.  You can also get a death benefit of $250. Not much though.

5) make sure all your financial affairs are in order, and you know passwords etc

6) cry.

7) Realize that it DOES Get better.  It NEVER stops hurting, but it will be less painful day by day. I still feel an ache in my heart, and I miss him so so much.  Our lives will NEVER be the same without him. 

it was the worst thing that happened to me, being widowed at 29.  And I didnt know how I’d get through it, but day by day…I am.  I have met a wonderful man whom I’m very much in love with, and who loves my kids.  You just have to put one foot in front of the other.

Post # 53
Member
54 posts
Worker bee

I can’t even imagine, and my heart is heavy for the Bees who have been through this. I know it sounds dramatic, but I honestly would be lost, as would my boys, especially the seven year old, who just thinks he hangs the moon. 

I know I would have to be strong for the babies, but I also know that there is no one for me but him. There wouldn’t be any “moving on” later in life because I know for a fact I would play the comparison game and no one would measure up. I’d be just heartsick.

 

It’s nothing nice to think about to be certain. I pray every day for a long and happy life together. I guess that’s why we nag each other (I nag him about sunblock and eating healthy, he nags me about my terrible smoking habit). 

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