(Closed) What if you got the ring.. and hated it?

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: What would you do if he proposed with a ring you didn't like?
    I'd fake a smile and graciously accept -- then quietly tell him the truth later : (121 votes)
    49 %
    I'd grin and bear it -- and wear it proudly, forever! : (103 votes)
    42 %
    I wouldn't be able to hide a negative reaction. : (24 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 16
    2120 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    this is why my fiance told me he WASN’T picking my ring LOL

    Post # 17
    100 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I was totally honest with Fiance since we started to talk about looking for a ring. I told him I definitely needed to pick out my own because I would not be able to conceal my reaction if I saw a bad ring. 

    Post # 18
    537 posts
    Busy bee

    Heh, one day I just matter-of-factly announced that I had chosen 5 rings that I liked, and had emailed him the links. This was without any prior discussion of ring shopping.

    Lo and behold, I got exactly what I wanted…

    Post # 19
    9397 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    I’d be all like

    Post # 20
    29 posts
    • Wedding: January 2016

    Oh this makes me laugh. As a man that went through the whole proposal process, I consider myself to be a thoughtful romantic but honestly nothing is worse than a poll like this. It screams I’m a picky materialistic ****. If you get a ring and proposal be happy that someone thought enough of you to propose and buy you a ring period. Nothing ruins romance and marriages worse than this kind of insignifigant poppycock…The problem with society today is women are raised by their parents to think they’re supposed to be princesses, when in reality life isn’t a fairy tale. That is all.

    Post # 22
    4943 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012


    View original reply
    zippy85:  Honestly, it would depend. I mean, is it completely off the wall tacky, or is it nice, but just something I probably wouldn’t have picked?

    If it was nice, just not what I had my heart set on, I’d wear it proudly and not say anything. If it was so completely horrible – like if it had dragons and tentacles and eyeballs, I’d be honest about it.

    Thankfully, I didn’t have to worry about this as my husband had asked me to pick what I wanted. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 23
    604 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    View original reply
    zippy85:  I was honestly terrified of this scenario as I’m extremely picky about jewelry, don’t wear rings at all, and have a pretty active job… So Fiance knew better than to totally surprise me.

    We basically shopped like 3 different jewelers, I picked out rings I liked at all 3 of them and then I was politely but firmly shut in the dark ๐Ÿ™‚ I got one of the rings I picked out and I adore it. He either read my mind or gauged my level of excitement (I didn’t tell him) but he picked my favorite one ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 24
    3585 posts
    Sugar bee

    I would probably talk to him a few days after and tell him how i felt about it. Since the proposal was so special to him i wouldn’t want to shoot him down by saying i hate the ring it’s ugly so I’d let the dust settle first.

    What really happened was we decided we wanted to get married. I told my Fiance i had to help pick the ring because one i don’t wear a lot of jewelry and two i am picky so that’s what we did. I shopped around and learned my style. Once i knew what i wanted we looked together and bought something we both loved Or more what i love because he is not the type to say something is ugly. He would just say i know nothing about rings so if you like it then i guess it’s a good ring. 

    Post # 25
    3585 posts
    Sugar bee

    View original reply
    TheGridMonster:  this reminds me of my daughter lol. Every morning when it’s time to get up for school! 

    Post # 26
    3387 posts
    Sugar bee

    View original reply
    zippy85:  I’m going to echo PPs, this is exactly why Fiance and I picked it out together.  He knew me well enough than to try to pick for me, which I’m eternally grateful for ๐Ÿ™‚ 

    Post # 27
    531 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Totally wanted to share, my Darling Husband picked out the ring completely by himself. He wouldn’t even look at pictures of rings I liked. I wanted to teach him about the 4C’s and he didn’t listen and I actually tried to tell him I really wanted moissanite but he wouldn’t listen. He wanted it to be 100% his choice.

    It made me mad, honestly. I was the one wearing it after all!

    He proposed with a princess cut 0.25ct stone in a cushion halo for a tcw of 0.5 on a thick shank. Not my taste, really. It was awful cut, color, and clarity and I found out it was very expensive. I figured I’d wear it for a while and maybe upgrade in 5 or 10 years and keep it in my jewelry box.

    Then after wearing it 2 years, I found out my center stone could and probably will crack and Helzburg wanted to exchange my center stone. I cried like a baby. This is the stone my husband proposed with and I wore at my wedding and when our son was born. This is my perfectly imperfect stone! I hated that stone all along but when they wanted to take it I was really, really distraught! 

    I haven’t decided what to do yet with the ring/stone dilemma but it took all this to make me realize that it’s more than just a piece of jewelery to me, it’s the memories and emotions connected to the ring I once kind of hated. 

    Post # 28
    5789 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Honey, I’m an impatiently waiting Bee! I will be all over that ring like Gollum on Precious even if it’s so hideofuckingugly that when I post pics of it here on the Bee, y’all will have to lie through your teeth telling me how lovely it is

    Post # 29
    7897 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I don’t think I could ever hate the engagement ring; it’s only a material gift for goodness sakes! More important is the commitment to one another. If you really didn’t want to wear it, you could always just keep it safe in the box and wear the wedding band on its own in the future. 

    Post # 30
    92 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    View original reply
    realmenwearthepants247:  When I first read your post, I didn’t understand why a guy would have such harsh, negative feelings about a girl wanting to have a say in choosing her forever ring. Then I read your username and it all became clear.


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