Post # 1
My Maid/Matron of Honor is planning a night out in SF, 2 hours from where most of us live. There are approximately 8-10 girls going as of right now. From what I understand, we will be getting a suite, getting dinner… and a few other things that are surprises for me. She said right now it’s going to cost each girl approximately $150 including drinks, dinner, the hotel, and everything else she’s planning. My question is… is this a reasonable cost? I really want it to be affordable for all of the girls. Should I ask her to cut back on a few things and make it more affordable or is this about right?
Post # 3
I think it all depends on what your girls can afford. Now that I have a good job something like that would have been great, but if you would have asked me a couple of years ago I would have said yes, but would have had to figure out how I was going to pay for it and be stressed about it. I think if it were me and this is something you want to do, I would explain what your doing and the cost to each person and say i understand this may not be in everyone’s budget right now so no hard feeling if anyone can’t.
Post # 4
Thank you 🙂 my Maid/Matron of Honor is being very open and honest about the activities and cost for the bachelorette to all the girls invited. I don’t want to ruin any suprises for myself, but I just get this feeling that maybe we should keep it under $100. It’s a tough economy and some of my girls are hurting right now.
Post # 5
I wonder what the average cost is?
Post # 6
We are having a weekend away to a thermal springs town, cost is around $30 per person accomodation for the weekend, $30 for weekend admission to the thermal pools, we are all putting in for food (pot luck style) and then buying our own drinks etc when we go out. (talking $NZ) and we are giving everyone names so they can carpool and arrange their own transport. so all up around $200 max for the whole weekend.
It looks like we are date twins too, when is your hens night? Mine is 5 October.
Post # 7
Awesome! Mine is October 6th :)! I just got engaged 2 months ago so it has been hectic trying to organize everything! I should probably stop worrying about things like the bach party and focus on the things I need to get done haha. I’m always just so worried about asking so much of everyone.
Post # 8
I agree with PPs that it depends on what your girls can afford…I know for my girls, they probably wouldn’t be able to afford much, so I plan on making it a simple outing, possibly one of my gifts to them 🙂 it’s really up to the girls planning the event and willing to pay and attend…
Post # 9
Like others have said, it really depends on the girls attending. My friend is having a bachelorette party in Vegas and lots of her friends are spending upwards of $600 just for the weekend, so I can’t attend. Mine was a dinner / drinks / dancing night that cost each girl anywhere from $20 – $100, depending on what they purchased.
Post # 10
It seems a little much to me, but many of those things are subjective. I’m assuming not everyone will drink or eat the same thing, so they can keep their costs lower if they want to.
Post # 11
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
She should probably run it by the girls invited to see how they feel about the price point.
Mine was last weekend, was FANTASTIC, and was just $45 for everyone.
We had a potluck dinner at someone’s house, did a one-hour BYOB pirate cruise in the Inner Harbor, then hit 4 bars in Fells Point. Tickets were $25, and everyone chipped in $20 for my ticket/alcohol- with getting pitchers, the money lasted til the bride-to-be was done.
Under $100 is a lot easier for people to deal with- I know I wouldn’t have gotten the turnout (12) if mine was $150- maybe 5 would have come.
Post # 12
I agree with @megan26:. It depends entirely on what is reasonable for each girl.
I asked that the cost be kept low for my hen’s night. We had dinner and went to no-cover clubs so it would have cost about $20-$100 depending on how much they individually drank. I think I spent $120 that night as I brought a couple of rounds of drinks (to thank everyone) and an electronic bullride for one of the girls (because she said the only reason she wouldn’t do it was the cost!).
Post # 13
It really depends but I think it’s important to be open. A recent bachelorette I was supposed to go to (I got REally sick the day of) included a $70 trip to the spa(just entry), a $35 class, an expensive dinner and an after party. Even if I wanted to go to all of the parts….I would have never been able to afford it. In total, the events were probably around $200/person and the Maid/Matron of Honor was never clear or asked us about cost. The other girls really easily could cover all of those costs. So it depends.
But please..do whatever you do….don’t decide what is reasonable for your girls. Even if you think they can’t afford something…they may be budgeting and looking forward to it. Or they may still be far away. Just make sure your Maid/Matron of Honor is communicating it all.
Post # 14
I don’t think there is an average. 150 dollars is something one person may be able to afford and another wouldn’t be able to. Your Moh shouldn’t make any concrete plans until she talks to each of the girls and gets their max budget. Then she should try to make it work, and it quite possible some of the more well of people will be happy to chip in a little extra. Or she might have to scale it back a bit.
Post # 15
I agree with others that it really depends, but to me, that sounds on the high end. I’ve usually spent somewhere in the realm of $50-100 for Bachelorette parties, but then again, I’ve never done a “destination” bachelorette party. Were these costs discussed up front? I’d be really upset if I showed up and then was asked to cough up $150. Do the girls have the option of just driving home if they don’t want to spend money for a hotel room? Are the girls that are attending your bridesmaids, or just friends? If they are bridesmaids and they’ve already expended money on dress, shoes, showers, gifts, etc, I’d say that is asking a lot. If they are just friends, I don’t think its totally unreasonable as long as you discussed it with them first and they agreed. If you haven’t yet, someone should discuss it with them privately. I hate when someone sends an email CCing all involved and saying “We are planning on spending $100 each. Is that ok with everyone?”. Nobody wants to be the lone voice of dissent so make sure its done discreetly.
Post # 16
I agree with PPs and say it depends. Could I afford $150 for a bachelorette party? Yes. Do I want to spend that much money? Probably not. Your Maid/Matron of Honor should ask each girl privately what her budget is and go from there. She shouldn’t ask if this is OK, but people might be embarassed or feel guilty if they say no.