What is and isn't considered part of the wedding budget?

posted 2 years ago in Logistics
Post # 2
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

niahc :  Any and every purchase related to your wedding is part of the budget. Dress, invites, band, etc. All part of the budget.

Post # 3
Member
844 posts
Busy bee

I didn’t count make-up or personal services for myself in the wedding budget (waxing, facial, ect).  We are paying for the wedding ourselves but those expenses come out of my account not the joint account.  I think what you have listed is reasonable to include in the wedding budget.

When you say your mom is planning on spending outside the budget do you mean that she is spending her money for things that go over or are you expected to make up the difference?

Post # 4
Member
854 posts
Busy bee

niahc :  If it was for the wedding, we counted it in our budget–stamps for invites, ribbons for invites, flowers, table cloths, venue fee, photographer, etc.

We had a separate honeymoon budget and saved for that separately. We also sort of thought of rings as being separate, but that’s only because we bought them early on and I want to convince myself that we spent less than we did–so I categorize those in the “gift” category, hahaha.

 

 

Post # 5
Member
1706 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

niahc :  I think you mean are there things you and Fiance should plan on paying outside of the budget with the 4 contributors? In that case, yes.  Why should anyone other than you and Fiance pay for a honeymoon or your wedding bands? The same for cleaning of the wedding dress…you wore it, you are responsible. That comes out of your pocket.

Everything else is splitting hairs. It sounds like the bigger issues are the scope and nature of the desired wedding. $10k is a good budget for a wedding, but would be pretty hard for a black-tie dinner for 130. I think you and the other members of the wedding finance team need to get on the same page…or decline money from both sets of parents and pay for what you can afford. 

Post # 6
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We did not count our rings or my hair/makeup in our budget as we paid for those out of pocket and saved up separately, but I think you should include anything in your budget that you need to plan ahead to spend money on. It will vary for different couples depending on what those things are!

Post # 8
Member
6705 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

If you are spending someone else’s money, I don’t think any of the first four ought to be included; those ought to come from your pocket alone. The website isn’t necessary at all, and the rest are personal items, IMO. 

Post # 9
Member
559 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

When Darling Husband and I were planning our wedding, we got money from my mother and step dad, my dad, and DH’s parents. 

What we did was request a check for their agreed amount of the budget. We put the checks in our bank account and spent it how we saw fit. 

We kept our parents opinions in play; however, we did not let them overrule what we wanted to do for our big day! They were very respectful. You just have to get guidelines our super early and establish boundaries! 

Some things that we included in this budget money: dress, venue, food, music, favors, decor, flowers, photographer, officiant. 

Some things that we paid for ourselves (even though that budget above was had money we included as well): rings, shoes, DHs outfit, alterations for my dress, hair and makeup, invitations, thank you cards, bachelor/bachelorette, and honeymoon. 

(I’m sure I’m forgetting something!)

Post # 10
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

 

 

niahc :  My fiance and I have separate bank accounts and I make quite a bit more money than he does, so I did not count my hair/makeup/beauty stuff in the budget. I also did not count our marriage bands, as I paid for them, or the honeymoon, since we are taking our honeymoon next year. Other than that, everything is counted in the budget. I highly recommend A Practical Wedding; here is their article on budgets with a spreadsheet that might help: https://apracticalwedding.com/creative-sample-wedding-budgets/ 

Post # 12
Member
3855 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

I guess I’m confused, your parents want to pay for specific things like the musicians and flowers, right? So they pay for the items they want, and you pay for the rest. Whether you dry clean your dress or not doesn’t affect their items. And if they are paying for something, they decide how much they want to spend on it. If your mother truly wants to pay extra for upgraded flowers and music, why not let her? 

Post # 14
Member
1706 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

  niahc :  I can see that it is hard. The line we drew could unkindly be phrased “us vs. them”.

Anything that was only for “us” came out of our of our pockets separate from event budget (e.g., buying and cleaning of his suit, buying and cleaning of my dress,  makeup, hair, wedding rings, stationary, website, officiate, day of jewelry bought for occasion, my little purse for the day, my shoes for the day, honeymoon, gifts for attendants and family, marriage license, etc.).

Anything that was for “the attendees of the event” or the “event space” was in a separate budget (e.g., catering, site fees, tables, chairs, decorations, harpist during processional/ceremony, beverages, handicap ramp for event space, desert bar, beverages, etc.). 

We were gifted: flowers (all I said was no stargazer lilies or roses, no plastic holdy things), our dads built a chuppah and mom’s decorated it, my mom sewed guys matching vests, we were gifted a funny 1-tier wedding cake.  DH made a bunch of mix tapes (on a professional digital deck) for the entire reception. 

What was gray? Photographer (was that us or them)?  

 

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