(Closed) What is “being engaged”? (vent)

posted 9 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree with you, there is a lot more to being engaged than just having a ring.  There are quiet a few couples on here who are planning and wedding and don’t have rings because they don’t want to or can’t afford it.

Post # 5
939 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I agree, i think people are too hung up on the ring.  some people get married without an engagment ring at all, does that mean they were never engaged? no.  that’s just ridiculous.   I think as long as you both mutually agree you want to get married to each other, you are engaged. 

Post # 6
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

To sum up what you said about that woman’s comment- “What an asshole” 

Post # 8
729 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

i understand. I went out with my Fiance and is cousin and his wife (they got engaged after us and married before us), well I forgot my ring at home. I am te type of person who doesn’t wear my ring around the house or to school/work (I’m a nursing student). As soon as I got in the car she noticed that I didn’t have my ring on.

I don’t think that wearing your ring all the time means anything. I was in a rush when I was leaving and i forgot to put it on. She was shocked that I would not wear it.

A ring does not mean your commitment is stronger.

Post # 9
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Engagement is a frame of mind!

Post # 10
2095 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

That’s ok I am planning my wedding in a few months without a ring or a proposal even…lol. I refused to let him propose until his divorce was finalized, which it finally will be. My ring is currently being made for us so I probably won’t have that until right before the ceremony…lol. My friend’s father is a jeweler so he is custom making our rings. So according to that I am not engaged and technically he is still married to someone else, so I guess technically we are not even considered a couple. Although we have been living together almost 2 years….lol.

Post # 11
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Bleh. My mother was always like, “You’re not engaged unless you have a ring and a date.” WTF? It’s a very old-school thought, though, and some people are super traditional. In the end, it really doesn’t matter at all what people think or say. If you guys have been engaged since even before the ring went on your finger, then you’ve been engaged for that long. And congrats and good luck on your wedding day!!

Post # 12
7582 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

It’s amazing what jerks people can be. I think it’s just an old standard that if you’re engaged there must be a ring. Pretty silly tradition if you ask me. Don’t get me wrong, I love my DH and my ering, but it’s funny to think that a man you plan to spend the rest of your life with has to buy you a sparkly present in order to get you to agree.  It takes a lot more than that.

Post # 13
3482 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I was engaged for over a year before I had a ring on my finger. Nobody questioned me when I called DH my fiance during that time, but if they had, I would have told them that I was engaged the moment I said yes, and a ring is just a symbol that choice that one chooses to wear.

Honestly, am I any less married when I take off my rings to shower? Are DH and I any less in love if we’re not giving each other gifts every day? Material world indeed…

Post # 14
3571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

hahahaha, I’m sorry. Don’t worry about this “friend.” And if it makes you feel any better, my wedding is in a week and a half and I’m not wearing a ring. I’m only going to wear one ring, so its saved for the wedding.  So your feel free to have your “friend” put than in her pan and fry it. ; )

Post # 15
7299 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@kayp23: engaged means that you both agree to marry and plan a wedding. You don’t need a ring.

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