(Closed) What is the BEST piece of dating advice you've ever heard?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
1245 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Two good ones:

“Learn how to like people who like you.” This was key for someone who used to have major self-esteem issues — the old Woody Allen line about not wanting to belong to any club that would have me as a member. When I started selecting for (not running from) people who genuinely showed interest in me as a person, dating got a lot easier.

And, in regards to my now-husband, I was fussing about whether I should start a relationship with a guy who was a friend, whether I thought we had enough chemistry to risk potentially ruining the friendship if things didn’t work out, whether I was even ready to date again after a bad breakup, etc. Our mutual friend told me: “Stop worrying about the label and just let it become whatever it’s supposed to be.” So freeing!

Post # 17
Member
3952 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

OP, that’s amazing advice. I remember getting something similar to that and I frequently tell that to friends who are having guy problems. 

I guess I would say the best piece of advice I got was from my mother who said, “You should never have to change who you are for someone else. If he’s the right guy for you he’ll love you for who you are.” 

Post # 18
Member
3083 posts
Sugar bee

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kerplunk00:  No boy is worth crying over – and the one that is, will never make you cry. 

Post # 19
Member
619 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

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nessdawwg:  I’m actually glad I didn’t listen to my (now ex-) friends back in high school when they expressed doubts about my now-FI… Still going strong after 8 years and not regretting a sec of it! 

Oh and here’s the best advice I got, it’s from the book “At First Sight” by Nicholas Sparks: 

“Marriage is about becoming a team. You’re going to spend the rest of your life learning about each other and every now and then things blow up. But the beauty of marriage is that if you picked the right person and you both love each other, you’ll always figure out a way to get through it.”

When I read that paragraph, I was overwhelmed; I think it is just beautiful how this is true, and how my Fiance and I tried to live up to that until now without even realizing it…

Post # 20
Member
336 posts
Helper bee

I was crying on my dad’s shoulder when I was dumped some years ago and he said to me, “No man is ever worth your tears. This is just a learning experience.”

And the other day when I was complaining about my S/O to him he said, “You have something that most women would dream of, a man that wants to commit. Do you know how rare that is? Don’t try to change him, love him.”

***I love my daddy***

Post # 21
Member
1065 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

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thesummerangel:  I agree there are exceptions.. but for me, I have had the same group of close friends for 7 years or so and they are really supportive and only have my best interests at heart so there have been times they have raised concern and I’ve not listened to them… only to turn around a couple of months later and admit they were right.  Luckily they love Fiance lol.

Post # 22
Member
9129 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

Every young single woman should definitely read He’s Just Not That Into You.  

Post # 23
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014 - Loft

That just because you wouldn’t do something, doesn’t mean someone else would. Like wise, just because you feel one way that doesnt grant you the reciprocation. Whether that be negative or positive.

 

 

Post # 24
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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kerplunk00:  a good guy friend of mine told me when i was a young teenager (it took me a while to believe it) that ” it doesnt matter how thick or thin a girl is or whatever, if she truly believes shes sexy. Everyone else will believe it too” “Confidence (self confidence)  is the sexiest thing a women can have”  unless of course shes super super full of herself. but hes was teaching me not to be insecure and to love my body no matter what. your attitude is contagious.

also best one ever “how he treats his mom is the way he will treat his wife” totally true in every relationship ive been in….which isnt that many but you know 😉

Post # 25
Member
537 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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kerplunk00:  that advice is very true! most women like to speculate and dissect a situation but guys are very simple. 99% if they’re not calling you they’re not interested. Don’t waste time on said guys!

that sadly was one I had to learn like we all do. The best advice I was ever given though was:

“Marry someone who makes you laugh, because in the end that’s all there is.”

the wisest, smartest, kindest woman I know told me that just as I entered my teens. She is my aunt and godmother and has been married over 30 years. My uncle still makes her laugh. She’s very right – looks will fade with time but you need someone there at the end of the day who’ll stand by you through everything and make you laugh. 

2 years on I still think my Fiance is a very handsome man, but he is also very kind and good to me. And he makes me laugh like a drain. 

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 3 months ago by  MrsSpagan.
Post # 26
Member
43 posts
Newbee

“Just because he desires you, doesn’t mean he values you.”

Post # 27
Member
1609 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I didn’t date for a long time and bemoaned how hard it was to find someone. I read some awesome advice that to meet the kind of man you want to meet, go where you think they’ll be. If you don’t want a guy who’s out every weekend drinking then a bar probably isn’t that place. A friend also said to put yourself out there to meet all kinds of new people as you never know who they will introduce you too. That’s what I did and I ended up meeting the most awesome man.

Post # 28
Member
619 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

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nessdawwg: I’m happy to hear that! You are lucky, keep those friends close! Mine were kinda jealous and petty I guess, but hey it was high school… It turned out one girl I’ve been friends all along is now my best friend and she always supported me and Fiance : ) Sometimes true friends show up in the hardest times and these are the ones we should listen to and keep! so I agree with you for that! Just, not alllll friends, there are exceptions as you said!

Post # 29
Member
871 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I can’t remember any advice I was given

Post # 30
Member
243 posts
Helper bee

Not really advice I’ve been given, but just what I’ve learned over time…

1) Just let it go and only be angry about those things which really, truly, deeply matter to you.

 

2) Appreciate every moment you have together, and spend as much time as you can doing happy things and making memories.

My Fiance has an extremely dangerous job and when I think about all the times I could have lost him, (or could do in the future) it puts my whole life and my love for him into perspective. We don’t argue, because we both realise that time spent arguing is time wasted. If we disagree, we take 5 minutes out and then we have a cuddle, explain how we feel and just agree to disagree. 

Since we have been together, my Fiance says he has seen more of the world, and appreciated more of his life than ever before I came along. I really try to appreciate every moment and do as much as I can with him, but the moments I love best are when it’s just me and him in our home alone together. 

Anyway, that was a bit soppy but it’s how I feel and ‘advice’ I live my life by!

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