(Closed) What is the craziest thing your (future) in-law has done or said

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What is your relationship with your in-laws

    They are amazing. The In-laws i always dreamed i would have

    The movie "monster-in-law" was based on my in laws.

    Other....Explain

  • Post # 62
    Member
    544 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

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    @AlwaysSunny:  Hillarious!!! I wonder what the dress looked like! haha

    Post # 63
    Member
    453 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Hah. Crazy? Let me check my mental library…

    Probably the time she said that she’d seen the sasquatch, but she thought he must have hypnotized her because no one else saw it.

    Post # 65
    Member
    481 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    my Future Mother-In-Law just let us know the last time we visited that she wants “more grandbabies.” (SO’s brother and SIL just had one.) Well, SO and I aren’t even ENGAGED yet lol. She’s actually pretty cool, if this is the worst of it, I can’t complain.

    Post # 66
    Member
    11231 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

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    @itsashleyday:  AHHH This happened with FI’s stepmom. I don’t even know who she was introducing me to, but we’d been dating for like three years at that point. Dude, I’m his girlfriend, and we live together. 

    My Future Mother-In-Law is usually pretty awesome, which makes up for my mother being…the way that she is. She did say that she’s just going to wear the ivory dress that she wore to her other son’s wedding ten years ago to ours. Um, no. Oh, and that she doesn’t want to be in any pictures because she “breaks cameras.” Bullshit, she’s a hottie. But we aren’t doing a million posed family pictures anyway. I feel bad for her because her other DIL is fucking crazy. She’s been in town with FMIL’s only grandchild for MONTHS and Future Mother-In-Law rarely gets to see the kid, and when she does, it’s for a short period of time and she never gets to hold him or anything.

    Post # 67
    Member
    11231 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

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    @littlebeanpole:  
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    @mecattacow:  OMG my Future Mother-In-Law does this, too, and she’s been divorced for over 20 years. I’m like, “I love you, but…let it go.”

    Post # 68
    Member
    3828 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    ehhh they aren’t that bad. But Future Mother-In-Law has a bad habbit of trying to monopolize our time and then tries to make us feel bad if we cant attend EVERYTHING.  Thankfully Fiance is the only kid in the family who will stand up to her. 

    Post # 69
    Member
    2686 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: County courthouse

    After our first child was born, i suffered from horrible PPD and was very protective of her. my Mother-In-Law snatched my baby from my arms saying i was being ridicoulous…i had a breakdown and we had to leave. she and my husbands sisters also overstepped their boundaries…trying to take over my role as her mother. it finally got to the point where i was going to leave my husband cuz he never defended me or said anything ti his mother ire sisters. We worked it out and his family clearly know their boundaries with our children. my husband fully supports me and defends me. now i have a good relationship with my inlaws

    Post # 70
    Member
    407 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I love my Future Mother-In-Law, but there are just some things that make me uncomfortable. Her and Future Father-In-Law are very well off, but you’d never know by looking at them or seeing their house… Their car is 10+ years old, they live in a 1,300 square foot condo, etc. However, they spend absurd amounts of money on almost a daily basis. (These are also the same people who want Fiance to get me to sign a prenup so I can’t touch his trust or inheritence, like I talked about in a post about a week ago).

    Anyway, I grew up kind of poor with a single mother, though my dad paid some child support. So, my sister and I only got new things on our birthday and holidays, unless we paid for them ourselves. I mean, I started baby-sitting regularly from 12-17 and paid for my own lunch at school and whatever else I could just so my mom wouldn’t have to and got a banquet serving job at 16 and on to help buy groceries, etc. This was how we lived. 

    Now, whenever we go anywhere with Future Mother-In-Law, she pressures me to let her buy me something and it makes me so uncomfortable because I was raised and grew up so differently. For example, I went to the mall with her and Future Sister-In-Law when Fiance and I were only dating a short time and she caught me eyeing a pair of shoes in a window, which I knew I couldn’t afford at the time. So, she said she wanted to go in the store and she found the shoes and told me to get my size because she was going to get them for me. I told her ‘Thank you, but I can’t let you do that.’ She said ‘Let me buy them for you. I’m going to be really offended if you don’t.’ Future Sister-In-Law nodded and chimed in ‘You should just get them or you’ll really upset her.’ I never felt so awkward and uncomfortable in my entire life. I ended up breaking down and choosing my size. Then, she insisted I needed them in both colors and picked up a second pair and walked to the register. I was dumb-founded that I was “forced” to allow Future Mother-In-Law to spend $150 on shoes for me. And she does this EVERY TIME we go anywhere. Last time we went to Best Buy as a family, we walked out with a Playstation 3 (FSIL), an iPhone 5 (FI), and a Blue Ray DVD player (me) plus some CDs and videogames. And we only went in to get Future Mother-In-Law new headphones.

    Also, she keeps buying things for the wedding without telling me and I’m getting random packages at my house with no idea where they’re coming from or what they are. And Future Sister-In-Law does the same thing, but on a lesser scale. I bought a cheap cake serving set for the cake cutting only to find out she bought a gorgeous crystal set for us with matching champagne flutes.

    Don’t get me wrong – I’m extremely grateful for everything they do, but I could do without the guilt trips that come along with me refusing a ‘gift.’ 

    Post # 71
    Member
    407 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Oh, and, though we’re not married yet, my mom and Fiance call each other Mother-In-Law and Son-in-Law because they have a great relationship. Well, Future Father-In-Law heard him refer to my mom as Mother-In-Law and FLIPPED OUT. He yelled at Fiance and said not to call my mom Mother-In-Law because ‘she isn’t your family yet.’ WTF, dude?

    Post # 72
    Member
    135 posts
    Blushing bee

    She asked me where I learned to speak English.

    My Fiance told her that we met while he was deployed to Afghanistan. I worked for an international organization when we met but apparently this part of the story didn’t get relayed to his mom.  So the first time I met her she asked when I studied English.  I was very confused by her question but wanted to make a good impression so I answered her by saying “University of Chicago”.  She told me my English was very good and she was surprised I didn’t have an accent. 

     I said thanks thinking to myself this woman was bat shit crazy.  After a few more minutes of her praising my outstanding English skills my Fiance came in the room and figured out what was going on.  I laughed hysterically but she didn’t find it as funny as I did.  We still joke about my English skills but only where dear old mom isn’t around.

    For the record- I am a tall blonde blue eyed Midwestern and no one has ever thought I was anything other than American during all my years of traveling.

    Post # 73
    Member
    56 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I love my Future Mother-In-Law, but there is a large age gap between me and my fiance (13 years) so there is an even larger gap between me and my Future Mother-In-Law (my Fiance was the last of 3 children). That being said, she’s kind of old fashioned in some aspects.

     

    Just the other day in a car ride home from Pittsburgh she cranked out this gem of a story about her and my Future Sister-In-Law, “We were lost trying to get to the zoo, and we pulled over and some guy said, ‘follow me!’. We followed him, and he got us there but we were crazy for following him- he was black! Who knows what he could have done to us?!”

    All I could get out was, “Really?! Did you really just say that?” before Fiance changed the subject to avoid an all out cat fight.

    Post # 74
    Member
    1218 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

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    @futuremrsndl:  Whoa! My mum started calling my Fiance ‘son in law’ since like, the day we got engaged. I think she’s just excited.

    Post # 75
    Member
    2 posts
    Wannabee

    My Future Mother-In-Law is just rude and insulting most of the time. We are doing a lot of DIY things for our wedding to save money, and I’m making flowers for the ceremony and reception. They aren’t real, they are paper flowers, but they’re pretty and theres lots of tutorials on the internet for them. My family, friends and my fiance all say they look great, and love the creativity in them, and that we are saving a good amount of money doing this. I showed them to my Future Mother-In-Law one day because she is home all the time and I thought she’d want to be involved with some aspects of our wedding since she hasn’t volunteered to do participate in any way. I showed her my flowers. She said to me, “ooooh honey, these look cheap!!! I’ll buy you some real flowers Let’s go to the store and I’ll buy you all the beautiful flowers you want.” I almost cursed at her but refrained. She must have felt bad because she later offered to work on my flowers and said she would make them look great and I left her with all the supplies. Then today of course my fiance calls to tell me I should go pick up all the supplies from her because she told him she couldn’t. Wow – real A++++ for effort. 

    Post # 76
    Member
    116 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    …where do I begin?

    My Monster-In-Law is racist, sexist, and homophobia.

    I am a queer woman of color.

    She told me she didn’t like my kind of my culture because of how hypersexualized we are (I am latina). She gets incredibly uncomfortable around black people and when I pointed out that she didn’t seem uncomfortable around my mother (who is black), all she had to say was “well she’s not that dark”, and she meant it as a compliment.

    She has said that if a woman is raped, it’s probably her fault because of how she was walking/what she was wearing/whether she was drinking/whether she was by herself/whether a man was present/whether more than one man is present. She has called me (and MY MOTHER!!) a slut because my arms were showing (mind you it was 80 degrees and humid).

    She has denigrated queer people left and right, saying tha they are perverse, saying that they are all child molestors, etc.

    The worst part of all of this is that my husband told her before the wedding took place that in order for her to be invited, she needs to just not say anything offensive for like…three hours. That’s it. Just don’t be a total fucking douchebag in a congregation made up of queers, people of color, and women (some with vaginas, others with penises, not that it matters). Just don’t. Be. A Douche. He didn’t even tell her that she had to change her mind about ANYTHING. Just that, out of respect for him and me, to not say anything racist/sexist/homophobic.

     
    AND SHE REFUSED.
     
    And then went crying over to my father-in-law about how mean and unreasonable we were being.
     
    Oy vey.
     
    Needless to say, it was a huge relief when my husband said she just wouldn’t be invited, and she is no longer in our lives. Dodged that bullet.

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