(Closed) What is the etiquette in this destination wedding situation?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

Things could change… You might as well give them the details.

Post # 4
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would send everyone an invitation, even those who said they wouldn’t make it. It will probably hurt their feelings not to get one. 

As far as information for the future party- I would include that information on your website (if you have one). Then, send out separate invitations for that event. I wouldn’t include the information in your invitation packets for the wedding.

Post # 5
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

@lmpeters83:  Best etiquette is always to send invitations to separate events, in separate envelopes at separate times. If you link them by putting them in the same envelope, you risk confusing people. Some will wonder whether you really want them at the Toronto wedding, or are just including that because you have to, when you really want them only at your California party. Some will think that you are hinting that they should bring wedding presents to your California party.

The practical consideration — that the opportunity to visit with you in the winter may cut down on the people willing to undertake a 7000-km round trip in the fall — is separate from the etiquette considerations. But if you make the sacrifice of a smaller turnout at your actual wedding, by offering that option, then you get points for thoughtfulness. A five-hour flight is an awful lot to ask of people.

Post # 6
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee

I agree seperate events diserve seperate invites but guests to need to know that it is happening. Put something on your website that says

“Though we would love to have all of our out of town guests join in our special day we understand the long trip might not be practical for some. We will be hosting a (whatever you want to call it, reception? picnic?) in ___Location___ afterward for those of you who may not be able to attend. Expect to hear more details after the wedding”

obviously you can put it more elequantly then that, but something that lets guests know there is another option, especially if you are inviting elders or people with small children who won’t be able to make the trip.

Post # 8
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@lmpeters83:  I think most people include it on their Save-The-Date Cards. 

Post # 10
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@lmpeters83:  Yes, we put ours directly on the invitations because we didn’t do Save-The-Date Cards, and we’re doing an online RSVP. I think it’s more “formal” if you include it somewhere else, like your RSVP inserts or your informational inserts, but that wasn’t an option for us.

Post # 11
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@lmpeters83:  You can either put it at the bottom of your invite or on a separate card with “For more information please visit (website address)”

The topic ‘What is the etiquette in this destination wedding situation?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors