Post # 1
Do you have to get everyone a gift?
I don’t mean to sound rude or anything but we’re already spending a fair bit with the wedding, is it a must to have gifts for the guests?
A lil insight into our wedding, nothing big… small garden wedding and then small reception back at our place (no sit down meal either) so it’s not like we have tables to place each gift down anyway… kindda stuck… help.
I dont want to offend anyone either… already done that this year HA HA
we weren’t going to actually have a reception (when we were looking at restrants etc) because it was going to have $5000 min for that and man we could have such an awesome honeymoon with that money.. anyway we thought we would mention it to each of our parents and see what they thought.. told my mum and step dad and they were like ‘yeah thats fine, its your wedding.. your day, have it how you want it" LOL so then we told his mum LMAO!!! omg i couldn’t believe she said this "thats a bit rude not having a reception, people are travelling all that way and your not even going to feed them?" and i was like "yeah but its not going to be anything big" "Yeah but what are people meant to eat" LOL i walked away saying "bring a sandwich" grr that made me a lil angry. so we’re have the reception at our place (and no not because of her but because of lil things i dont want to miss out on like the cake and the first dance)
anyway i’ve gone completely off the subject HA HA sorry!
Post # 3
The point is to show thankfulness for the well wishes & gifts your guests will be getting you.
Favors don’t need to be expensive- they can be as simple as wrapped homemade cookies w/ a thank you tag or even leftover cake. Food favors are always a big hit & never go to waste!
Some people feel they aren’t necessary, but it is a nice guesture to show your thanks for all the effort that your friends & family put into your wedding day!
Post # 4
Thanks! i see your point.
Also… if i’m not having a big sit down reception how do i hand them out?
Post # 5
I’ve also seen people donate to a charity in their guests’ name/honor. Then, they provided the guests with a little note on the donation, to where, why, etc. I’ve seen it done in a real classy way. Perhaps choosing a charity that’s close to the both of you and not something random. One of my friends suffered from diabetes and other complications and they gave a donation to a diabetes foundation.
Hope that helps. That might make it easier to hand out. You could print the note on nice paper, roll it up and tie with ribbon, place it in a basket for guests to pick up as they arrive.
Post # 6
This past weekend I was at a wedding with no favors whatsoever. I am fairly close with the bride so I knew that the wedding was on a strict budget. In fact we were got a B-list invite.
It was really weird not to see a favor. Can I just say that people notice that? It’s not that we’re greedy we just want a little something to have as a favor. I agree that they dont’ have to be expensive.
Post # 7
It isn’t necessary, and many people are opting not to have favors. However, if you aren’t offering them a meal, may I ask where the majority of the budget is going? Small little candies can be affordable and not take up a lot of room. I would be irked if I went to a wedding where NOTHING was for the guest, i.e. no food, no favors etc… If I saw that thousands of dollars went into other things like flowers or decorations. This may not be the case in your situation but it is something to consider. Weddings are expensive for guests too, between gifts, travel and attire, it is nice to walk away with something.
Post # 8
Since we are having a garden wedding and I teach botany (amongst other subjects), we are giving packets of wildflower seeds that say WILDFLOWERS FROM OUR WEDDING, with a little note thanking folks for sharing our day. Since we are not getting the seed packets personalized, these packets are running 35 cents apiece. I am just putting them in a basket so guests can help themselves.
Post # 9
They have the same point as a thank you gift for your bridesmaids or an elaborate will-you-be-my-MOH card…you don’t HAVE to do it, but if you want to, it will always be noticed and most times be appreciated.
Post # 10
My fiance and I decided to donate to a charity of our choice instead of buying favors for our guests that will likely get left behind or thrown away in a few months. We plan on writing a small note and placing it at each seat or in our program somewhere. Our families think it’s a great idea and we’re very excited to give some money for a great cause.
Post # 11
We are also making a donation to a research foundation in lieu of favors. We’re placing nice cards on the reception tables informing our guests of the donation. I have been to many weddings, and I can’t tell you how many dinky coasters, cheap frames, candy boxes, pens, fans, etc etc I have thrown away!
@bluespurs, I like the idea of seed packets! 🙂
Post # 12
You can always make something small that serves multiple purposes so you don’t feel like its going to "waste".
I made little name tags with everyone’s name out of clay and am putting them on fishing wire like a key chain, this will serve as a favor as well as place cards
Post # 13
- Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union
From the official etiquette standpoint, favors aren’t required. So if you’re serving food and drink, you’re pretty excused from giving favors. The thinking is you’ve already thrown the party, so you really don’t have to give guests something to "entertain" them.
I was intending to skip favors, but I’m leaning toward the candy buffet with take-home bags now. It’s a pretty visual element and this way I offered something.
Post # 14
GabGal – We are serving food but its not a sit down meal, we’re having sushi and chicken nibbles things (such as mini spring roll, pastry thingys etc) and we’re also putting aside about $100 for Alcohol (wine and Beer) so it’s almost $400 for food and drink.. then the rest of our budget is dress (mine and stepdaughter who is BM), suits (grooms and step sons who is the page boy) then we have the ceremony venue, photographer. Plus the rings… and the honeymoon.
I dont think i’m even having flowers because they cost so much.
I’m finding that people who go on about "oh i didn’t get anything from the wedding" i think thats rude… your not there to get presents, your there to witness/celebrate the joining of two people in marrige…. but i guess if people who have tons of money to spend on OTT weddings then i guess you should kindda expect a lil something but yeah… sorry just having a vent.
A few people who i have been talking to at work about wedding stuff have said to me "oh if you not going to having flowers/or have a reception/or do whatever ‘normal’ wedding have then you might as well not have one… just go elope" LOL i no longer talk about my wedding plans with anyone BUT my fiance 😛
Diorable – OMG I LOVE the idea of the candy buffet!! OMG OMG!! i was already thinking about having a big bowl or two filled with certain coloured Jelly beans to match the wedding colours… OMG!! thank you! i think thats what i’m going to do!
CANDY CANDY CANDY CANDY!!!!!! *jumps up and down* HAHA note to self… keep an eye on the kids near the candy table HA HAHA!!
Mums wedding i made white chocolate mud cupcakes and love heart cookies… my step son, nephew and lil cousin where into them and ate nearly half of them both LOL THEN they were VERY VERY sick (having running around playing afterwards) LOL
THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR YOUR INPUT!!!!
I’m so happy i’ve found a board that can help with this sort of things 🙂 YAY!!
Post # 15
I’ve never understood the point of favors – it seems like half of them get left behind anyways, or people make fun of them.
Post # 16
Yay, another down under bride!
We are having a very similar wedding in Auckland, just a small afternoon ceremony at the public gardens and a 3 hour reception with cocktail food. Since people aren’t assigned any seating we are going to put out a big bowl of chocolate hearts (covered in foil in our wedding colours) and pop it on the guest book table for people to munch on or take home.It will kinda serve as desset as well since we are only serving cake after the food.
On a side note, my Fiance wanted to get married the day you are but I told him I wouldn’t wait that long haha so we are doing it on 10 October this year.