Like the title says I’m curious about what promise rings are all about (ha ha) I’m from the UK and I’ve never seen anyone with one. You get the odd few couples who have commitment rings (not sure what the dealy with that is either) but not promise rings.
Are they the same thing?
What are they promising?
If it goes on you (e-ring/wedding) finger why can’t you just be engaged?
Does a promise ring have a different look to e-rings?
How does the promise proposal work?
I’m not knocking anyone who has a promise or commitment ring in any way shape or form I’m really just curious. 🙂
my boyfriend gave me one 8 years ago when we were teenagers as a promise to one day marry me. i think its just a gesture to show a high level of commitment.
gomezandmorticia : from what I can tell it’s for the younger couple that aren’t ready for marriage but what to signify that they intend to marry that person.
I think commitment rings are the same, but they could be for people that don’t believe in the institution of marriage but want to signify that they are taken.
Then there are purity rings. Rings that are a promise to keep your virginity till marriage. In my jewelers store I see mothers and father come and buy dainty little rings as purity rings for their daughters but I also knew a couple in high school that bought them togther as a commitment to remain virgins until their wedding night (to each other obviously lol)
Like others said, it’s usually a younger couple thing. I’ve never met anyone over the age of 21 or so who had a promise ring. The cases I usually see it come up under are instances where the couple goes separate ways for college, but they promise to stay together, or a high school couple will have one to show commitment since they’re too young to be engaged. I personally think they’re silly, and it’s definitely not something that is the norm.
My DH gave me a promise ring when I was 17, we had been dating for 2 years but obviously were too young for marriage. He gave it to me as a sign he was committed to me and one day wanted to marry me. I tend to think it’s more of a thing for younger couples. We still considered each other BF/GF, not engaged by any means. He didn’t propose or anything then. He just gave me the ring for Valentine’s day like a normal present. It wasn’t really that big of a deal and it didn’t change our relationship status at all. I think he paid a few hundred for it, mine was heart shaped (which I really am not a fan of lol), definitely nothing like my engagement ring. I do think it’s strange when older couples do this though.
To my understanding, you’re still just “boyfriend and girlfriend” with a promise ring. Like prior bees have said, it’s mostly a high school relationship thing, if you want to prove you’re extra committed to this person but since you’re 16 you’re not getting officially engaged.
my friend’s boyfriend gave her a promise ring. they have been together fo 8 years and have 3 kids. no engagment ring, just a promise ring. which i personally found odd.. i think it is because they were having issues in the relationship and maybe it was a “promise” to stay commited and work on the relationship. i dont know. also he is the worker and she is a Stay-At-Home Mom. I feel like he is nervous for engagement/marriage because if it doesnt work out, he may have to pay alimony. i personally dont know the reason honestly.
Not young. We are both VERY close to 30. 28/29 with both birthdays in Dec. I think because we are older but smart to not rush he went and got one after 4 months of dating because we knew we wanted to get married to each other but also didn’t want to jump the gun after 4 months. We have dated ~13 months and I believe he is looking at the main ring now. I never understood a promise ring either but hey I have one. To each his own but I would not say it is specific to age groups.
I think promise rings are ridiculous, and I know that’s sounds harsh, but just my opinion. This is also coming from someone who has been in a relationship w/ her SO since we were both in high-school. I told my SO, that I’d rather him save his money and put it towards an engagement ring when the time came. I point blank said I never wanted a promise ring or felt the need, that I trusted our relationship enough to have his verbal word he loved me and our time to spend the rest of our lives together would come. Another personal opinion – I think most young couples (those mostly in HS.. MAYBE college aged) get them or even ask for a promise ring, is because they need that material item to solidfiy their relationship because they’re insecure and need the reassurance. I know a girl who was very protective over her BF and their relationship and as soon as she had that promise ring on her finger, she was not as obsessive/insecure over their relationship.. which again seems silly, but each to their own.
In my culture promise rings and earrings were used as an insurance of marriage -in the old times. So, if the guy backed out of eventually marrying the girl, she would still have some money on her favor. And, if she backed out, he would have a compensation as well.
Engagement rings are not original to my culture, so perhaps in a sense they represented a similar meaning.
eagleandimgone : Eeww… a purity ring purchased by parents for their daughter just gives me the yucks…. I cannot believe that people would even think this is okay on any level!
I don’t understand commitment rings either. Well maybe to 16 yo who need a to prove to that they are a couple. I also dont understand the concept of “engaged to be engaged” or “he is more than boyfriend but not a fince”.
Usually younger couples with the view of marriage in the far off future. Some seem to use it as a way of keeping their partner quiet about marriage though.