- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
I do not have a lot of experience with weddings, and my family is mixed culture so no clear guidelines on what to do, who to invite to what, that kind of thing.
Well, this past weekend my mom told me my Aunt wants to throw me a second “older adult only” Bridal/Wedding shower in June. Now the only shower I have been to was for my best friend and it was her wedding party, a few close friends, her mom and mother in law (About 10ppl). Now my family is considerably bigger, with extended family friends that are very close. Many of these extended friends are not invited due to finances and feasibility for us as we are paying. Apparently they still want to be included in other Wedding activities and the older ladies want to come to the shower even if they aren’t invited.
That’s all sounds good to me… expect why separate the showers into age groups? My mom seems to think I will be inviting my Bridal Party (6 girls) plus all my friends and there will be too many people in my Aunt’s house to include the older ladies. This seems silly to me, as I feel that inviting all my girlfriends is for the Bachelorette since that is where we will be having all the fun. Bridal showers would be a bore for them and they would feel obligated to bring a gift. For many who are not financially stable, I feel horrible implying they need to bring a gift. My mom thinks this is absurd, and I should have them all at the Shower too – this way we would have two Showers and my Aunt would host the one with the older ladies and extended family friends.
Now I feel this is excessive and really innapporpiate to have 2 showers where gifts are implied. That seems quite rude and greedy to me. Especially because I don’t see the need to have more than the Bridal Party at the Bridal Shower. I thought there would be 25 total. With my 6 girls that leaves 18 other famliy and friends. I feel this is plenty but my mom scoffed at me saying that won’t cover everyone. So who are they planning on inviting to justify two parties? I mentioned all this to my mom but she is set on two parties.
Does this only seem weird to me or is it normal to have showers for older family/friends that aren’t actually coming to the wedding?