(Closed) What is too young?

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
  • poll: What is too young to be married?
    Under 20 : (96 votes)
    57 %
    20-22 : (41 votes)
    25 %
    22-24 : (19 votes)
    11 %
    24-26 : (8 votes)
    5 %
    26-28 : (0 votes)
    28-30 : (0 votes)
    Anything below 30 is too young : (3 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7293 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think that depends a lot on maturity, religion, geography and background and who you are asking.

    If you ask at 29 year old bride, she will probably say 20 is far too young, cause she has watched herself grow and change in her 20’s.

    If you ask a 19 year old who is madly in love with her highschool sweetheart, she will tell all the naysayers she is not too young.

    It really depends on the couple!

    Post # 4
    Member
    1363 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    It’s not so much age, as maturity. You could be 29 and be too young if all you do is text speak and party and think the world has ended if you can’t buy your designer pair of shoes.

    If you have your priorities straight at 21 and have excellent communication skills with your fiance and know the difference between love and lust, no one can tell you that you are too young.

    I wanted (or needed) to live a little first. I grew up under a pretty strict roof so, hell, didn’t even kiss a guy until I was 21! 21 would be too young for MYSELF.

    Post # 5
    Member
    6597 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I don’t have a single age threshold that I consider to be too young in general it depends on the couple.

    However, in my area it is unusual for anyone to get married under 25 and couples under 25 would get some “you are too young” comments just because it is so uncommon.

    On the WB boards, I think the posters who come on asking about their age are in fact too young. Someone who is mature enough to be married will not come onto a wedding website and ask strangers for validation in what they are doing. There are many other young WB brides; however, that are mature and confident in what they are doing that I don’t even realize how young/old they are.

    On your poll I chose 22-24 because for MYSELF that would have been too young. But that doesn’t mean that it is too young for someone else in different circumstances.

    Post # 6
    Member
    286 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    If you have to question yourself on whether or not you are too young to get married then you are.

    There is no set number that is best.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2584 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I didn’t vote because I think the age is different for everyone. I’m 20, will be 21 when I get married, but I know and have been told that I’m very mature- I don’t live the college party lifestyle, never have, and I pay my own way through life. I know a man who is 38 and wants to get married, but he is immature and doesn’t communicate well in relationships, so I would say that he is “too young”.

    There are couples who got married as a teen and have been together 40 year +. There are couples who marry at age 30 and are divorced. There’s no set number.

    Post # 8
    Member
    152 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I didn’t vote because I don’t think there is a specific cutoff that applies to everyone. Maturity and situation all play a role in the determination of what is too young. Too young in maturity is worse than too young in age, IMO. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    6 posts
    Newbee

    under 25 is definetly too young…. you need to live more before tying yourself down.

    these days closer to 30’s or early 30’s is more ideal.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3068 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Depends on the couple to be honest. I am 22 and as mature as a 35 year old woman.

    Post # 11
    Member
    5110 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I dont think there is an age that is too young. It really depends on the people, the dynamic of the couple, how good their communication is, if they have the same goals, If they have their stuff together and how mature they are. Everyone is different at these aspects. People think that I am young. I am 22 will be 23 in sep and at the time that I get married. Fiance and I also have a child, that could be where a lot of our maturaty comes from. But again that is how we differ from you and John Doe etc. So I really dont think their is an age. I know people that are 40 and I think they are too young lol.

    Post # 12
    Member
    7771 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I think under 25.  I was 26 and that was perfect for me.  Then again, I have lived a lot. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    1556 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I think under 18 is too young, no matter what.  If you are not a legal adult, I think you’re too young.

    But beyond that, I think it really depends on the couple.  If you are 20 and are self-supporting, mature, and know what you want out of life and how you plan to get there, you are not too young.

    On the other hand, if you are 30 and still live with your parents, don’t contribute financially to the household, work sporadically or not at all because you aren’t sure what you want to do with yourself and quit jobs that aren’t “fulfilling”, your mother does your laundry, your parents bought your car and pay for your car insurance, and your dad calls your employer for you when you’re sick, you might be too young to marry (and yes, this is someone I know.).

    Post # 14
    Hostess
    16213 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    So, so subjective. I wasn’t ready to be married at 20. I was more than ready when I did get married, at age 24. But that’s me.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1426 posts
    Bumble bee

    Agree with the majority of PP’s in that there’s no set age of when you’re “too young”, though I may question someone that is planning a wedding in high school or right out of high school…

    It’s different for everyone. Some may think under 25 or even 30 is too young (geez, I’m hoping to have a completed family by the time I’m 30…) but that’s only because THEY weren’t ready, doesn’t mean the rest of the world can’t and won’t be either.

    I’m 22 and have gotten the “aren’t you a little young” statements (very few, albeit), but I’ve never questioned getting married because of my age. I know quite a few women that have gotten married at the 22-24 mark and are doing quite well in their marriages and lives.

     

    Post # 16
    Member
    335 posts
    Helper bee

    @eliz85: “you need to live more before tying yourself down.”

    so wait…do you like…die as soon as you say “i do.”?? O___o

    looking at the married couples around me that are still together, a good deal of them got married young, in some cases right out of high school. my parents were 21 and 24 when they married. i know people say, “but that was a difrerent tiiime,” but they’re still together, so were they too young?

    i would say getting married before you graduate high school is generally a bad idea. i do know someone who eloped as soon as she turned 18, and i cannot imagine her relationship lasting, not because of her age, but because of the relationship, which has always been unstably on again/off again. and now, she’s trying to support both of them instead of going to college as she originally wanted. :c

     

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