(Closed) What is with the bratty teenagers?

posted 8 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Do you think teenagers behave worse now than when you were a teenager?

    Yes

    No

    I have the same experience as you/I know lots of delightful teenagers

    Umm...where do find these delightful teenagers because that is not my experience?

  • Post # 17
    Member
    2273 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

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    @She-Hulk:  I find it to be about 50/50 some kids can be good kids under the hard exterior and there have been others that unfortunately even as young as 12 seem unreachable… I just hope that they one day meet someone – friend, cousin, teacher – that can bring out their good sides and allow them to develop into good adults… Aaah in an ideal world.

    i guess as PP states there’s good and bad adults so it stands to reason good and bad teens and good and bad children…

    Post # 18
    Member
    3622 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

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    @secondchances:  I think “it takes a village” wouldn’t really be applicable to homeschooling?? In public school, kids are in school with their peers and – at least where I’m from – the families/community/teachers are all close knit. The home-schooled kids didn’t get to experience that. 

    Anyway, I voted no. There are plenty of nasty people and plenty of nice people of every age. I work with a middle-aged to geriatric population, and they are some of the nastiest people… I know plenty of teenagers who are nicer than them!

    Post # 19
    Member
    116 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: January 2009

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    @ShellVee:  I agree. We definitely know kids who are unreachable and it’s very sad.

    Post # 20
    Member
    2889 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

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    @redheadem:  Actually it is very applicable. There is a lot of misinformation about homeschooling out there. In the community where I live about 40% are homeschooled. There are multiple home schooling groups and many people attend more than one. The mothers are all very tight and trade off teaching subjects they excel in. It might surprise you that many of these women hold a college degree and some have even taught on a college level. So they are teaching children a field of study they are passionate about, without worrying about time constraints or being held back by the slowest student. Group sizes are much smaller and ground can be covered much faster and in more depth.

    These mothers also are one anothers emotional support system and in fact act as an extended family. Every mother looks out not just for her kid but also her friends’. They correct and guide one anothers children. When you pull up to their house you will almost always find a bunch of “extra” children about. They recreate as a family with other homeschooling families. The dads become tight and often take the children hunting/fishing together. The children are blessed with multiple positive male role models.

    Then there is the extended family. Aunt Loise is a gifted pianist so she teaches the groups children piano for a much reduced rate. Uncle Mike is a welder and there is a young man passionate about antique car restoration so he puts together a class for the juniors and seniors to teach them his craft. Cousin Mark is a lawyer and volunteers to teach a class on US history and the Constitution. Uncle Verle is a gifted carver and wants to teach a class. All these people spend many hours with these children puring all the love and wisdom into them they have to offer. If you factor in that these familes become very close knit and celebrate birthdays, graduations, weddings, etc together it isn’t surprising how a family of four becomes a “family” of 100+ very easily.

    This is something I very much admire about my community. People truly do care about one another.

    Post # 21
    Member
    4654 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Another teacher here, though it’s mostly pre-teens I see.

    I don’t think they’re really much worse than any teenagers ever were. I know pre-teens allllll over the spectrum from super sweet and mature (and obedient!) to unable to think more than two seconds into the future or consider another human being in their choices.

    My theory:

    I don’t think either side really predominates, I do think the bratty ones are LOUDER though, which makes them look like there’s more of them at a glance. You’re more likely to see and pay attention to a pack of bratty teens being rowdy smashing bottles on the sidewalk or something  than a group of sweet kids having a soda and playing cards or watching a movie. Even if you SAW a group like that, they wouldn’t likely get your attention, they’d just fade into the background of “normal polite people I don’t need to pay attention to.”

    So then you think “how do teens behave” and the well behaved ones don’t really pop up immediately in your head, but the bad ones do, so you go “teens suck!”

    Post # 22
    Member
    7358 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Oh I definitely think it’s way worse. The bratty behavior I think has gotten a lot worse since I was a teenager. I think it has a lot to do with little parent involvement and everyone being too afraid to discipline their kids. My teacher friends get SO much crap for parents that feel it’s not their job to discipline their kids, make them do their homework, or even check on what they’re doing. Hello? They’re teenagers, they need someone to keep them in line.

    Post # 23
    Member
    10357 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I don’t think how teenagers act is a direct reflection of how their parents treat them (in all situations). My parents treated me and my brother equally….but he was a total asshat as a teenager and I was a studious angel.

    I don’t think teenagers are that different (especially given the fact that most people on these boards are 3 or under….hasn’t been THAT long since we were all teenagers. I think it’s that we are on the other end observing the chaos, so it seems so much worse.

    Post # 25
    Member
    3728 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    I think teenagers are a reflection of their parents and their hormones. I was a hormonal wreck in high school and the moodiest, most miserable person. I wasn’t bratty and was trying to be sweet like my parents taught me, but hormones do crazy, crazy things.

    Post # 26
    Member
    2889 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

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    @MrsFuzzyFace:  I am glad you live in such a great community 😉

    After living in 13 states I can say this is probably how MOST homeschooling families live.

    Post # 27
    Member
    4044 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @MrsFuzzyFace:  LOL, when I was a kid I knew a lot of homeschooled teens and they were some of the worst. They had huge chips on their shoulders about being homeschooled and were usually extremely stand offish and bratty.

    I moved to a different city after college, and here the kids are more relaxed, well behaved, and a bit nerdy. I meet very few homeschooled kids but the public school kids in my town seem fine. Move one town over (to a bad neighborhood) and the kids are running amok!

    Post # 29
    Member
    4654 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

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    @MrsFuzzyFace:  I teach English in Korea, so I can’t say for sure because a lot of the families and I can’t really communicate so well, but the most… shall we say challenging students… at my school seem to be the most spoiled ones. Kids who are quite obviously from wealthy families and don’t often hear “no.”

    That said, I used to know two sisters from a family just like that. One was EXACTLY like the students I’m describing (self-centered, disrespectful, irresponsible, totally lacking a brain-mouth filter or an awareness that other people exist and *gasp* may not be fascinated by her every utterance) but her sister (just a few years apart) was always very studious, hardworking, and respectful to the point where she’d be pulling her friends in that direction as well. So anything can happen haha.

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