I’m brand new here, and this post couldn’t be more applicable to me!
Short answer: I moved to be closer to him and am currently living in my grandmother’s finished basement 10 minutes away (it’s a walk out, so at least it has windows, haha!). I own a home in my original city still though while I wait. We have a clear deadline we agreed on. I think that makes it easier for me to wait because I know it will all be sorted out by the end of the summer one way or another.
I’m 27, by the way, to give some context. I’ve been independent since 18, so moving in with family was a BIG change for me.
He has one roommate who is really nice (has had no issues with me staying over on weekends for the last year and a half), and they have a townhouse with different levels so it’s almost like they each have their own apartment.
Boyfriend or Best Friend and I met on eHarmony just shy of 2 years ago, and we lived about 2 hours & 45 minutes apart (I wouldn’t exactly call it long distance, but more mid-distance). I lived in a major city, he lived in the Central part of the state. The only reason I really even considered dating him was because the town he lived in is the town my extended family is from.
I own a condo in my city. After about a year and a half together, I moved down here in January. My grandmother goes south in the winter, so I moved into her home and left my condo empty. When she came back a month ago, I moved into the basement and made a nice livingt area down there.
We made some very clear agreements before I uprooted my life. I was able to keep my (very good) job, luckily, and I work remotely. I rent a desk at an office here in town. We agreed that we’d make a decision one way or the other by the end of August, because I can’t take living in limbo forever. We agreed we would split all my costs of living down here equally, since I am still paying my mortgage on my home (not very much, just my share of utilities and my office rent).
We agreed I would leave my condo empty so I can move back and make it very easy for either of us to make the decision to end it if we want to – I didn’t want any “Oh, she moved, now I HAVE to stay with her” pressure. We also agreed we’d actually do pre-engagement counseling during this period – our first appointment is in 2 weeks!! We don’t really have any issues I can point to, I just like the idea of marriage prep BEFORE the ring is on the finger.
Looooong answer, but I’m happy with our situation, even though I never pictured myself in it.