What is your name? Do you like it?

posted 1 week ago in Names
Post # 31
Member
86 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2019

My family has always called me Hanna, but my given name is Johanna. I used to really hate it, and thought it sounded kind of boy-ish when I was younger. I’ve grown to like it more, and I think it is very pretty written in cursive. 

My middle name is Michaela (pronounced Michael, with a silent A!), and I always thought it was odd. My mom loves my name, but I got made fun of/called a liar in school because it looks like the more common Michaela. 

My last name is an extremely long, Russian name, difficult to pronounce and spell, and everyone messes it up.

 

I actually have grown to like my full name, because it’s so different. But once we get married my last name will become much more simple.

Post # 32
Member
168 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I have a non-Anglo name and I live in the US, so I get a lot of comments and compliments about it.

I will never understand the handwringing about how your child will have to “deal” with people mispronouncing and misspelling his or her name. My name is mostly commonly said by people who know me and when I do meet people for the first time, it’s no problem to repeat the pronunciation or to spell it out over the phone, it takes literally seconds. The pros far outweigh the cons – my name is distinctive and memorable, which is a huge asset, professionally. I grew up as a third culture kid in rural America and I was never teased for my name. In my small company, I work with a Kristen, a Christine, and a Kiersten, names that would make absolutely no sense in the context of my family and culture. I wouldn’t trade.

I have also noticed that many of the posts about avoiding “difficult” names come from Bees who also post about changing their last names so they can feel like a family unit with their husband, a very valid reason. But I wonder if they have the same anxieties about women ditching “easier” maiden names for more complicated married names. Funny how we’re willing to tolerate unusual names in some contexts but not others. 

I’ve posted a lot about names on here lately but names are important as markers of identity and family history. I find the name threads to be among the most covertly racist and xenophobic on these boards.

Post # 33
Member
1424 posts
Bumble bee

I love my name – My first name is a commonly-known noun with simple spelling and pronunciation. It’s somewhat rare as a name, but common enough that people don’t think it’s weird – and they know how to spell it.

My middle name is a common noun/verb that goes with my first name. And my last name is another very common noun/verb.

All together, my full name is actually a sentence!

Post # 34
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

First name: Leilani/Hawaiian Middle Name: Yoshiko/Japanese. I love both! But even at 35 its still kind of annoying that 9 out of 10 people mispronounce my first name. Most common is “Lilliana” and I’m sitting here like what are you reading?! Sound it out, geez. idk how they even come to that conclusion from Leilani. 🤔 I grew up surrounded by 100 variations of Keisha or some weird concoction parents made up trying to be unique so I’ve always loved that my name was different. Also fun at interviews, people are visibly surprised once they put a face to the name.

Post # 35
Member
5048 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

beesaredyingatanalarmingrate :  Mine is an unusual form of Erin.  It’s a legitimate spelling, it’s a male spelling but it’s so out there that no one knows that.  And I totally like it but… I still have to spell it for everyone or just let it be spelled Erin (or weirder versions sometimes).  People even spell it wrong when I spell it out loud – just yesterday, in fact, the hairdresser was looking me up and left the ‘h’ out.  I have met one person in my entire life with that name and by met, I mean I saw it pop up on my staff email list and shot him a ‘nice name’ message because it’s just that unique in the US.

So I like my name but it’s a pain in the ass as well.  I was happy to change my last name so that at least one could be spelled very easily – and people still ask how to spell that one as well, lol.

Post # 36
Member
1015 posts
Bumble bee

I have always hated my name. It’s very common and easy, but in my opinion, too “old school” and BORING.  It makes me feel like I am someone’s 80-year-old aunt. I totally think it does not suit me at all.  People always tell me I am glamourous and elegant…but my name does not exude glamour and elegance in any way and I always wish I had a nicer name.  I would love to change it, but feel it’s too late to do that now that I have my career, family, etc.  It would be confusing for people and my kids.

Post # 37
Member
279 posts
Helper bee

glitterati :  As someone else with a non-Anglo, “difficult” name, I agree that name-related struggles are fairly minor in the scheme of things, but I do find that I experience a lot of microaggressions based on my name, particularly because it is representative of a culture that is the target of a lot of racism and xenophobia in the US. I also often encounter people who, when I tell them my name, they immediately default to “can I just call you (shortened, Americanized version of my name)? I’m never gonna be able to learn that!” as if learning how to pronounce two syllables is a Herculean struggle. Having to repeat the pronunciation or spelling for a new person a few times isn’t a big deal, but being treated like I’m not worthy of having my proper name used or remembered because it isn’t a “white” name is. 

Having said all that, I still think that having an “unusual” name is not a horrible burden to carry in life, and I’m proud to have a name that represents my culture (which is why I’m keeping my maiden name and adding on my fiance’s, so I retain that cultural link). 

Post # 38
Member
4540 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

My first name was fairly popular when I was born in the late 80s, but not so popular that I ever had anyone in my class with the same name. I’ve met a handful of people with my name and there are a few celebrities with the name. Luckily, it’s common enough and only really has one spelling so people don’t get it wrong very often and I don’t usually have to spell it out. I don’t mind my name, but I hate the nickname which people occasionally try to use, it’s only two syllables, it doesn’t need a nickname. I also don’t really like that it is kind of dated, much like Jennifer, it’s pretty much late-80s and early 90s and that’s it. My middle name is unique, I’ve never heard it anywhere else, but it’s a very common middle name just with an A on the front, so it’s not too out there. I’ve always hated my middle name though. 

Post # 39
Member
598 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

     

Post # 40
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I have always really disliked my name, it’s not very common but mostly it’s just a different spelling. I don’t have a trendy 80s/90s name, but I do have the trendy “ee” ending instead of a “y”. I’ve only ever met a handful of people with my name, and never anyone with the same spelling. I remember when I was in high school we were watching a documentary in class, and part of it (I have no idea why) mentioned the top stripper names in the US…and mine was one of them. Super embarrassing to my 16 year old self. I wish I had a more classic name, I think that would fit me better. Nobody else in my family has a different name or spelling, and I definitely plan on giving my kids well known names that people know how to spell. 

Post # 41
Member
581 posts
Busy bee

I have a non-Anglo name from my culture that is also found in several very different cultures with completely different meanings. I like my first name a lot. It’s not unusual but not common either.

My last name (maiden name) is very specific to my native country, where that spelling is the most common. In some other countries though, that last name has a different spelling and different pronunciation, but the meaning and origin is the same.

I think names can be unique if they have some connection to the person’s cultural identity, but not if they are intentionally misspelled with otherwise no connection whatsoever.

Post # 42
Member
1738 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

DrCrazyCat :  I think even with a ‘normal’ name, you can still be subject to teasing because of your name. A kid at school spent a year calling me ‘Jenny Penny’ and throwing pennies at me and saying I was only worth a penny. I know it’s dumb now but it hurt when I was a kid. I hated my mum for a while for not thinking about the ways my name could be turned into something teasing. My last name is also a boys first name so I got a lot of kids calling me a boy too. So I kinda hated my mum for not changing us back to her maiden name after her divorce as well. It took me a while to realise they’d have turned any name into something teasing.

Kids will find anything and pick on it. I don’t say that to minimise your feelings about your name but sometimes a name is just an easy hit. It’s the attitude I’ve had to take because my husband’s surname is rude/funny and any kids will have his name. I know any kids in the future will probably be teased because the surname is such an easy hit. I just have to hope that any kids we have are more popular than we were at school and can therefore skip the teasing/bullying. And that they get my husband’s tall genes to hopefully convince the teasers they’re too big of a target. Or maybe I’ll just enrol them at karate before they turn 2.

Post # 43
Member
425 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

My name is Danika, and it’s okay but a lot of people pronounce it wrong. They say “dan-nee-ka” when it’s “dan-eh-ka”. Thanks to Danica Patrick, more and more people are starting to pronouce it correctly. I also get a lot of racing jokes. 

I hope to give our future children names that are easy to pronounce! 

Post # 44
Member
854 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

loz24 :  The kid threw pennies at you? That’s awful! I hear what you’re saying, almost any name can be twisted into something to be teased about. I’m probably just extra sensitive to it cause I never heard any of the Jessicas, Jennifers or Melanies in my class get made fun of. Kids aged 7-12 are the worst!! 

Just a quick story about surnames, in high school I had a teacher called Richard Blow – but he went by Dick – he loved his name. I’m sure when he was younger he got ribbed but all the boys in my class thought it was the best name ever! So I’m sure having a sense of humour about will help. That or karate, like you said! 😉

Post # 45
Member
2136 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My first name is Erin. My family is Irish so they gave me the most Irish first name on the planet. It’s not super popular, IMO, I don’t meet very many Erin’s ever honestly. I like it, it’s short, easy to spell, fits me. 🙂 

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