- 10 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
Ok Bees its opinion time!
My Fiance and I met and got engaged in March, 7. (we’d only been together for 5mths)
My FI’s sister who lives on the opposite side of the country whom i met that Xmas before got engaged in July 31. When i met her at xmas time for the first time she was telling me how they were going to get engaged. I was surprised how open she was about it before it actually happened (FI and I had only been together 3mths at that point)
Flash forward to March, we got engaged and celebrated with a small family dinner that night. All of our families were overjoyed. They knew we were serious very early on and we surprised some of them with the announcement (my dad and FI’s mum knew and helped my FI organise the family dinner)
We rang FI’s sister to tell her the great news and her first reaction was negative. “But you’ve only known each other for a few months!” She did follow with a congratulations at some point but she was on speaker phone and her mum grabbed the phone off us pretty quick after that comment. She flew over for our engagement party in May and everything seemed to be fine. (no more snarky comments)
Then FI’s sister moved back to our local town with her Fiance in November that year. She made a few comments early on that she wanted to get married the month after us (our date had been set since May). Fiance and I thought it was a bit rude considering his family had alot of out of town guests and that she didn’t ask us if we minded her having it that close or would even be able to attend (seeing we were planning on a honeymoon to europe). In confidence my Fiance found her through his brother-in-law to be that the reason why she wanted to get married so quickly was for a couple of reasons:
1. She felt that because she was the eldest, it was wrong of her brother to get married and engaged before her because it was known they were going to
2. She was already 31 and was a bit conscious about her age as a bride.
I had a feeling prior to this info that her reason to have it so close was to get back at her brother to steal his thunder and also she was upset at us for getting married before her by some of the comments that were made and that all their wedding plans were secret. I told my Fiance its all about communication and he should have talked to his sister about it rather than going through her Fiance.
But right now I can’t help but feel a bit sad for my Fiance because he did eventually talk to his sister about it and she blew up at him saying that she wasn’t jealous of us and “didn’t care about our wedding” and swore all of this on her grandpa’s grave even though we knew the truth from her Fiance.
My brother and I have a fantastic relationship and I would never do that to him. I don’t feel that i need to work in my wedding date with friends but i think with immediate family its a little different and especially costly if the parents are willing to contribute.
I had a friend that got engaged after us and got married before us and there was no jealousy or thought pass through my head. I can’t see why she wants to compete that way. The next thing will be who has the first grandchild! Oh no!