(Closed) What is your waiting timeline?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

I hoping for November, but we’ll definitely be engaged before 2011. He keeps asking to visit my parents and I’m being evil and saying no. I’m honestly not making another trip until there’s a ring on my finger. I’m not making christmas plans either.

Speaking of having rings made- I really liked this one ring, but wanted platinum (my white gold rings get too dented and worn) and I was told 3 months!! ugh

Post # 4
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I just told my SO if his bday comes up Jan and I still don’t have a ring, then we would have another talk. A lot of things have been going on in my life death, job, car, friends etc; honestly I don’t find myself thinking about the ring that much anymore and you know what bees, I LIKE IT. Waiting used to bother me like crazy a while back, and now for some reason everything is OK.

Post # 5
Member
14658 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Im not waiting (anymore) but I just had to comment on your line that your SO waits till the last week before xmas cause I thought it was funny.  Mine waited until the morning of Xmas EVE to run out of the house while I was asleep to try to get something and rush back before I woke up.  So imagine my worry given his procastination and waiting till the final possible moment. 

Post # 6
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

@7mom I feel the same way! Waiting isn’t driving me crazy anymore (lol it’s the rest of my life that’s crazier). Not having the ring isn’t really bothering me.

I’ve come to the conclusion that if I don’t have a ring by Christmas, I’m buying my own ring (probably better than the one he’d get me), making up a proposal and telling everyone he proposed. bwhahaha

Post # 7
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

At the end of May we both graduated college and were moving to a new city together, where he had found a job. He talked to my parents during graduation weekend about us getting married- which my parents brought up the next day at breakfast (I already knew that’s what he was going to talk about, but DAMN if my parents had ruined a surprise for me). Before we moved my boyfriend said we would be engaged in 2-4 months, so that left us by the end of September. Well I don’t think he even started considering it till the end of August or beginning of September, and he said he couldn’t find what he wanted and asked for more time. So now he has till the end of the month. As I said in my other post, I’m hoping it’s this weekend and he doesn’t hold out to the last possible moment! 

Post # 8
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee

I know for sure that it will be before April 2011 (I managed to get out of him that he wouldnt be proposing on our vacation to Ireland)

We are planning to have an October 2011 wedding and I have explained that I need more than 6 months to plan (a lot more actually). Recently I told him that being engaged felt far away because he had said that although he thinks about us getting engaged every day that he still hadnt decided on a day to do it or made plans. But, once I said that he told me that it wasnt far away (so maybe he was trying to throw me off before about not having anything planned?)….but I told him that far away to me meant 2011(Jan 1, 2011 actually!) and he said “Well I have 77 days then!” So I’m not 100% sure that he meant he would be proposing by the end of the year by saying that???? But I think it would be cruel and mean if he made that comment and then didnt do it!!

We are also going to look at my fav venue on Thursday (his idea, even though he had said previously that he wouldnt want to go in person until we are engaged).

I’m with MissBuffalo about really hoping for Novemeber!

Post # 9
Member
4693 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I have a pretty vague timeline, SO said it would be “a few years”.  It sucks to keep waiting, but he lost his job so until he finds a new one we’re basically in limbo.  I know it’s for the best, and we’ll be in a much better place to start saving for a wedding when the time comes!

Post # 11
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@Mrs.LetsGoPens: 

OMG when SO and I first moved in together we told people it was for financial reasons, but the truth was we just wanted to live together. My feelings were hurt so badly by my immediate family. You just have to stick by your decision and TRY to let the negative comments bounce off. I also think your waiting pains will ease once you and your SO live together. My waiting period has been less stressful since I realized life is going by way to fast. I will be 25 next year, that’s half of 50 :-). I told my So that I wish time would just slow down, so I can just enjoy every second.

Post # 12
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

idk why I’m not crazy right now. A couple months ago, I was going berserk. I feel pretty calm in general. Everything is finally happening!! If anything, it’s kinda weird keeping all of this inside and not telling any of my friends. (I’m sure they don’t want to listen to the “ring saga” or analyse everything he mentions about upcoming trips with me!).

I’m a little anxious about Thanksgiving/Christmas, but I guess I’ll figure it out when it comes. Eek and my mom wants to take a 3 week vacation with us next summer and I don’t want to tell her that I’m not sure I want to go because that would use all of our annual leave for the year (aka no honeymoon).

Post # 13
Member
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I was in a similar situation, had been dating for 6 yrs!  He promised by Thanksgiving of last year when we went down to see my parents, well the Saturday before Thanksgiving he still didn’t have a ring and when I asked about it he would hem and haw around saying he wanted me to go, etc…  So that morning I said get in the car, we’re going to the mall.  We picked out a ring and I was wearing it a couple days later.  BUT it was very hard to trust him, he had given me timelines before but they were so vague that when I would ask him about it he would say he stil had time.  I told myself that if there was in fact no ring again I would have to seriously evaluate, if he wasn’t into marriage that was fine but I was and maybe it just wasn’t meant to be…  I coulnd’t tell him that though, ultimatums have the opposite effect on my guy, lol. 

Post # 14
Member
493 posts
Helper bee

OMG! At the beginning of the year I gave him 1 year (by the end of 2010). It’s now October. My bday was 2 days ago. I was kind of upset that I got just a “gift” and not a ring. Uggghhhh!!! I know that there have been financial issues. But I’m not going into 2011 without a ring. I kind of told him sarcastically, after he asked, the night of my bday that I was hoping for “something else”. Hint Hint…. I don’t want to pressure him. But I’m tired of waiting and suffering. Please someone give me those anti crazy/waiting girl pills! LOL! I’ve only been this way about waiting the last 3 months. 

Post # 15
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

My timeline was up a LONG time ago. However, after J and I had a huge discussion back in August, he said that he’d have enough for a ring by January 2011. So, I guess January is my timeline, but I’m giving him some extra room in case something comes up, so… The end of March. J said that by January he will have paid down enough of his credit line to “get what we want” (a ring), and by March he’ll have most of his credit line paid down (he told me this on two separate occasions). *fingers crossed*

Gwen

Post # 16
Member
302 posts
Helper bee

I am not going to say anything else to him until Thanksgiving (unless he does it before then!), but it would be nice if he did it in Novemeber, although I don’t sense it coming that soon.  I feel like I can be patient until New Year’s Eve, but after that it is going to be really hard.  We talked a little about timeline, but not too much because he is afraid to give anything away.  I asked him if he thinks he will do it by our 5 year in May and he said probably around then, maybe before, maybe after.  I REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY hope it is before!!!!!!!! 

We are looking at buying houses now (want to have one by spring) and I said I won’t move in until we are at least engaged.  I said, “can you deal with living alone until then?” and he just vaguely says, “Don’t worry about that, it won’t be a problem…”

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