(Closed) What Judgement / Stereotype Do You Have To Overcome Daily?

posted 8 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 107
Member
651 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@sunshine_kar:  I am also half black, and have to deal with assholes asking what my nationality is all the time. I’m Canadian assholes! Then you get the “no, really where were you born?” Um.. Toronto! Ugh. 

But to your question, in Canada we do not say African-Canadian because unless you are actually from Africa that doesn’t make sense. We say Black. Just like I never hear Caucasian, but we say White.

But my cousins from the states say that all the time and it makes me giggle because they are not really African-American – they were boorn in Jamaica! So they are technically Carribean-American, but that’s a mouthful.

Post # 108
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651 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@RockStar33:  Every summer my White friends say “look I’m darker than you” and compare our skin tones. Do yours do this, and does it bother you? I am seriously annoyed by this. Why does it matter if your skin is darker? I feel like they are implying I’m not actually “Black enough”.

Post # 109
Member
709 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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@SillyStacey:  Exactly! I’m white but you wouldn’t call me Caucasian or European-American or some other crap. But where I live, most of my black friends don’t care being referred to as such. Someone called a friend of mine AA once and she said “No, I’m actually from jersey.” Lol.

Post # 110
Member
2115 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

 im 26 but people say i look 19. i just look like the girl next door. (for my nieghborhood) Im really bubbly and smily too. i wear my hair in braids a lot. Its just the way i am but i feel people dont take me seriously. like im just young and dumb. Like i look innocent. People never expect me to smoke, they always say you dont look like you would smoke. Or (years ago) youre an outdoor leadership major?, you look like you would be a teacher.

Also people assume im native american. (very large population here) I mean theres nothing wrong with it its just that im not. But I grew up in a native village. and my moms actually from brazil. It doesnt help that the new town i moved to has a huge family with my maiden last name. before i was married, people assumed i was related to that large family.

*people always judge u for a tramp stamp. obviously the nickname. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I used to work in the OR department and (before i had never thought) had to undress every day in front of my co-workers. Doctors, anesthesiologists, Nurses, scrub techs. Women of all ages. i couldnt help but feel like one of two of them judged me on that and the kind of under clothes i wore. lol. What can i say, i love push up bras even at work haha.

Post # 111
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651 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@classical_wolf:  This! When I realized I would be explaining this for the rest of my life I was pretty bummed about it. No one takes it seriously when I participate in LGBT community activities because I’m there with Fiance ๐Ÿ™

Post # 112
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1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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@MrsPanda99:  Same here!  When I first started working at my current employer 5.5 years ago, I was at my lowest adult weight.  I went from a physically demanding job, to sitting on my ass at a computer all day.  This place is also always shoving food in people’s faces, and complaining about anti-social tendencies if you don’t partake.  I am incredibly uncomfortable in my own skin at the moment.  Working hard to change that. *hugs!*

Intellectually, I know nobody thinks about it as much I do.

Post # 113
Member
1285 posts
Bumble bee

Divorced mom of 2 kids, remarrying.

Post # 114
Member
1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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@NickiBee:  It’s really such a shame that people attach a stigma to having children at a younger age.  My mom was pregnant with me when she was 17, and had me at 18.  It wasn’t a big deal.  People married and/or started families young on a more regular basis.  I was actually always really thrilled to have young parents ๐Ÿ™‚  if anything, it just means I get to keep them longer!

Post # 116
Member
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@SillyStacey:  

I’ve recently decided to volunteer at my local LGBTQ Commnunity Center so that I have some LGBTQ involvement back in my life (I used to intern at said center in 2007), but it doesn’t stop the comments like that from happening. Ugh!

Post # 117
Member
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

Ah, the weight one. I’ve been dealing with that one all my life, even after losing nearly 100 pounds. I’m taller than average, hourglass figure, a little more heavily built – and carrying about 40 extra pounds. People have said some truly horrible things to me over the years in a variety of places and situations, both related to me and complete strangers.

Going in for any kind of check-up is awful. I’m a vegetarian who works out 4 – 6 times a week. I’ve run 5ks in the past. My cholesterol, blood pressure and blood sugar are excellent. But most doctors see a heavier woman and assume you’re a fat, lazy hog who has never heard of this nebulous food category called “fruits and vegetables.”

They tend to think you’re uneducated, careless, single, asexual and so on. Worst of all, if you do have certain health problems, they chalk it up to you being fat rather than probing further. The birth control pill caused my blood pressure to become high – which was ignored by my doctor, who simply shrugged, “You’re fat, so naturally…” A week after stopping it, my levels were back to normal.

 

The vegetarianism thing is a sticking point. Of course I think it’s the ethically superior decision – if I didn’t, I’d probably be eating meat. That’s why we all make the decisions that we make – if you’re monogamous, you’re probably doing so because you see it as a better than not being monogamous. That doesn’t mean you’re preachy – you’re living your life as you want.

People can be very critical of the decision. I was surprised, though, that my family has been receptive and supportive of the decision. Fewer people resort to automatically defending their decision to eat meat when they find out I’m a vegetarian; many ask why I did it, and it’s not in an accusatory way. It’s pleasant.

 

I’m an atheist, so that one’s always a treasure. People inviting you to their church, people saying that we’re such a “Godly and devoted couple” (I guess because we don’t fit the stereotype of fire-breathing, child killing atheists). It is funny how silent a room can get when people find out that we’re “non-religious” (my euphemism for ‘atheist’ for most people). There’s usually a pause, then an, “…Oh,” before they abruptly move on.

All in all, a lot of potential landmines working against me.

 

Post # 118
Member
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@CookieCreamCakes:  

Congrats on your weight loss! I can definitely empathize on weight-related negative comments ๐Ÿ™

Post # 119
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

Mine is that since I am in my early 20’s and living with my parents and unemployed that I am automatically a lazy spoiled moocher. The reality is that I am sick and am fighting my doctors for a diagnosis. 

Drives me crazy when people are like “oh you just live with your parents” like I play video games and eat pizza all day. I wish that I felt good enough to do that.

Post # 120
Member
2947 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 1998

My 13 year old son gets judged all the time because he has OCD and ADHD. People who don’t know us judge us both very quickly. Its so sad how quickly people judge others:(((

Post # 121
Member
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@Holly77:  

I’m sorry about the judgement that your son gets because of his OCD and ADHD. I get judged because of my anxiety and Asperger’s and it sucks ๐Ÿ™

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