(Closed) What kind of Church can I get married in???

posted 10 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

I am not a practicing catholic and my fiance is baptist but we are getting married in a catholic church. They didn’t even ask if he wanted to convert.  I think they have really relaxed the rules a lot. You might check with some catholic churches and see.

Post # 4
Member
53 posts
Worker bee

I grew up in Watertown, CT, so hopefully I can help. I would highly recommend looking in Woodbury, they have many gorgeous older churches that would take you, plus there are many beautiful places to take pictures!

There is an awesome bakery there, too – Flour Garden – I stop there every time I visit my parents!

Post # 5
Member
2292 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

A church that is a historical monument, rather than an actual working church, might be a good option.  My sister was married in a historical chapel in Santa Fe; it used to be a Catholic church, but is now owned by the state of New Mexico. 

If neither of you has been married, a Catholic church might still be an option, depending on how progressive they are.  I think that in cases where there are already children, the general attitude today is that it’s a good think that the parents decide to marry.  However, if your child is from a former marriage by either one of you, you will have to get an annulment before you can marry in the Catholic church, which can take a lot of time.

Post # 7
Member
90 posts
Worker bee

YOu can do Catholic if the ones in your area aren’t too strict…that all depends.  You can also try an Episcopal church, which I call "Diet Catholic".  Basically it’s pretty much the same service but without all the restrictions.  You may still have to take a premarital class but it has more to do with picking elements of the service, and our priest is having us do a fun personality test. It’s only three sessions and it’s very relaxed.  Every church is different, and you may come across a really strict episcopal church that you don’t like too.  Often, they’ll baptize, marry, and bury anyone though.  Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I grew up in Watertown, CT. I would suggest St. John’s Episcopal in Washington Depot. It is a small church, but it is really cute! It is protestant but similar enough to Catholic that it would be familiar. If Naugatuck isn’t too far away, I would suggest going to the Congregational chuch that is right on the green. It is big and GORGEOUS!! Last I checked, they would let whomever married there. You would charge you roughly $500 as a donation to the church.

 

From my experience (my mom is a secretary at a Methodist Church), any protestant church would let you in. You would have to meet up with the minister and most likely give a donation to the church, though. There will also be a fee for the organist.

Good luck! I was really happy to see a local post! 

Post # 9
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

I’m not sure about a specific church in your area, but I’d recommend looking for Episcopal churches near where you are.  They’re very much more relaxed than Catholic churches traditionally are – it’s one of the few churches I know of that will perform the marriage ceremony for a gay couple.  Also, many of the buildings I’ve seen are just as beautiful, and in some cases more beautiful than catholic churches. 

Post # 10
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

If your Fiance is a practicing Catholic and wants to be married in the Church, then I would encourage you to at least try meeting with one or two priests in your area to see what you can do.  Take a couple of Sundays to visit churches you might like in your area, and see if there’s a community that you like.  I go to a relatively progressive Catholic Church and it’s obvious from the moment mass starts that it’s a welcoming, open community.  My Fiance is protestant and we’re being married there with no hassle.  Good luck!

Post # 11
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

My fiance and I have had great luck with Methodist churches in our area.  We didn’t want to use a Catholic church for various personal reasons despite both being raised Catholic.  The Methodist churches I have been in contact with have all been so welcoming, open to our opinion of what we want our ceremony to be, and some charge the same amount for members and non-members so you don’t have to feel pressured to "pretend to start going to church there" just to get a deal.

Post # 12
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I second subee. Definately contact your local parish and find a priest or two that you can talk with! Just be open and honest and the priest will present all the options possible to you. Many churches are happy to perform interfaith ceremonies, or ceremonies for people who have not attended church for a long time after some spiritual/personal councling. They’ll probably just want to know what the circumstances are, how you feel about marriage, etc.

You definately want to start with your local parish, but keep in mind if you’re looking for a "historical" looking church that your local cathedral may be the best place to have the ceremony (I only say that as cathedrals are usually among the oldest churches in communities). The dates for cathedral ceremonies fill up fast so you might have to be a little more flexible.

Just don’t be nervous- I’m sure you’ll find someone who’s very understanding and wants to help! It’ll be easier than you imagine! Good luck.

 

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