Post # 1
Well I can’t really explain how it feels. It totally sucks. It makes me say things like “I hate babies” and “I quit” even though I won’t quit and it’s all I want.
It makes me have questions every single day. Is what I’m eating right now causing me to not get pregnant? Is something really wrong with me (or DH) or are we just really, really unlucky?
It makes Darling Husband and I fight about sex. Who should initiate it? How can we make this somewhat enjoyable even though neither of us want to do it tonight in the 90 degree heat, but what if this is the day? What if we really have mis-timed it (even though I chart) for an entire year?
I don’t stress about it all of the time, but the overall subject is always on my mind because how could it not be? If we’re not figuring it out, we’re losing time…
There is more, but I’ll stop here.
Post # 3
I’m sorry, I don’t even know what to say. I know considering the circumstances it’s no consolation, but I did want to pipe up and let you know how hard I (and I’m sure a lot of other bees), are rooting for you.
Post # 4
We have not been trying as long as you at all (just started Cycle 8), but I feel for you guys. TTC is hard!!
Post # 5
I’m so sorry it’s taking so long 🙁 We are not TTC yet but I have been following the baby boards and I am rooting for you!
Post # 6
@JaneyD:I’m so sorry:( I think since I’ve been taking clomid and going to appoinments I’m 10 times more emotional. Today I wanted to give up…my cousin just announced she was pregnant on fb and someone said: “Well that didn’t take long!” she said, “I know, right?!” I broke down and felt awful. She’s ten years older than me and I can’t help but think I why I can’t have it as easy as her.
I’m rooting for you along with thee rest of the Hive! “The Sun will come out tomorrow…”
Post # 7
Hang in there girlfriend. My Hubby and I are just beginning our journey but we’re both in our 40s. I’ve known for 10yr that I would have fertility problems but waited until I found my Hubby. Now, I’m having my 2nd myo in 10yrs and praying I won’t have to go the IVF route. As crazy as our journey has been, I’m BLESSED and know we will be parents in the near future. Why? Cause I have faith, a great Hubby, wonderful family and friends, an Awesome Doctor and my fellow Bees.
You will be a Mother just as you are a wife. Keep the Faith and continue to lean on your Bees:)
Post # 8
Hugs Mrs Green Grass!!! I understand that it sucks! In my experience, lots of things about TTC suck…The timing, the waiting, the over-analyzing, the stressing, the pain of conceiving only to lose the baby and having to start all over again….But ultimately we all do it for the same end goal, and that carrot is just too enticing to stop! Don’t lose hope, it will work for you and we’ll all be here to celebrate with you when it does!
Post # 9
BIG HUGS! I know what you mean when you say you don’t stress about it all the time but it is always on your mind. It’s not always a huge stressor, but whenever you think about things or the future, it’s always a part of the big picture.
I’m in month 7 because of my miscarriage, and it is HARD so I can’t imagine how you feel 13 months later.
Have you set a plan with your OB or found an RE? Not that you need one, but I know you went in for some tests and were considering it. Sometimes having a plan can make you more hopeful.
I’ll be cheering for you!!!!!!!!!
Post # 10
Hugs! If it makes you feel better … month #13 was the lucky one for us!
Post # 11
@Ms Mini: Thanks : ) I’m feeling lucky this month!
Thanks to all of you ladies. I’m actually really not all that depressed. It just an “it is what it is” kind of thing. Also, I’m much more positive during the TWW because I feel like there’s a new chance. In another thread I mentioned that I’m used to doing well at thing if I try hard enough. Well, we’ve been trying very hard and it’s so frustrating that I can’t control it!
My temps are very high so feeling good…
Post # 12
Oh, hugs! I am so sorry you are going through this very stressful time.
I’m rooting for you, too!
Post # 13
@JaneyD: Sigh….I couldn’t agree more even though I’m not on month 13 yet. **Hugs** The high temps sound very promising!!!
Post # 14
If it makes you feel any better, we are on month 15…. I’ve cut down drastically on so many of my favorite foods because I’m insulin resistant and have PCOS and I’m trying desparately to get my cycles running on their own again. I’m feeling hopeful this month because for the last week I’ve been dreaming that I’m pregnant, but dreams don’t equal reality, so I’m trying not to get TOO hopeful.
I’ve not gotten to the point where I hate babies or want to quit, but I do feel like my body is broken and have break downs every so often when the whole world is pregnant except me. It’s hard to feel happy for someone who easily gets what you have been trying so hard for…. And even if you know it was something that they had to try hard for as well, it still ends up being a reminder that you still haven’t made it.
Keep your chin up. I know *KNOW* that isn’t easy, but just keep trucking and good things will come for both of us!
Post # 15
Hugs!! We are all routing for you guys (if that helps!) We haven’t been trying as long (month 8 b/c of my miscarriage) but I get what you are saying about the bickering about sex and the fact that it’s always in the back of your mind. What keeps me going is how worth it it will all be in the end.
Post # 16
I totally can relate to everything you just said! We are on month 14 in the TWW… Some months are super hard, and others are a little easier.
I don’t think that anyone understands how difficult it is, unless they have been through it, which none of our friends or family have. Thank God for the hive, otherwise I would have gone out of my mind by now! It helps to hear ppl that have gotten pregnant after trying for a long time to even know it is still possible. Sometimes I feel like taking a few months off- but I know that I would never make it through without noticing it was time.
Hopefully our time will come soon! Life just isn’t fair sometimes, especially for overacheivers like us!