(Closed) What qualifies as “engaged” to you?

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: At what point are you considered engaged?
    When it is mutually decided that you two will get married to each other : (60 votes)
    14 %
    When mutual planning of a wedding begins without a ring : (31 votes)
    7 %
    When a ring (that both parties are aware of) is in production/layaway/or some other sort of limbo : (5 votes)
    1 %
    When he proposes (with or without a ring) : (275 votes)
    66 %
    No ring - no engagement : (45 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    4682 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014


    Engagement consists of:

    Party 1: Will you marry me?

    Party 2: Yes.

    Post # 4
    3521 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I think that once you’ve decided to get married, you’re engaged, period. 

    Post # 6
    335 posts
    Helper bee

    i’m really interested in the responses to this. i always thought that if both parties knew they were going to get married, had agreed to it (whether from the down-on-one-knee proposal or just a discussion), that’s when you were engaged. because you have made an engagement. to be married.

    but it seems like there’s a lot of bees who have a date set, or already have had that mutual “we’re getting married, now let’s talk wedding details” conversation, but do not consider themselves to be engaged becasue the proposal is still on it’s way. i can understand wanting and expecting the proposal (or wanting to plan one yourself), but i think you could easily call yourself engaged before then if you already have mutual marriage plans. i guess the biggest factor should be something like, “when both parties agree to call themselves engaged.” lol

    Post # 7
    2586 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @kaylee26:  *giggle*  YES. 


    Post # 8
    10287 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    In my circle, an engagement isn’t official until the proposal has been made and the ring is either on the finger or in the process of being obtained. If there’s no ring, people tend to question it. Whether that’s right or wrong isn’t for me to decide, it’s just the way that my circle works. 

    Post # 9
    5800 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I voted proposal. Darling Husband and I talked about getting married within our first year of dating, I did not consider myself engaged. 

    Post # 10
    2584 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I voted “mutually decided” because to me, a proposal IS a mutual decision. He asked and I said yes, so it’s mutual. A lot of Bees have stories where they just discussed it and decided to get married, so I don’t even think a traditional proposal is necessary. And no ring is necessary either- I was ringless for a month but no one questioned whether we were engaged.

    ETA: Although, I suppose you can decide to get married eventually without agreeing to be engaged… in which case I think a mutual decision to call yourself engaged is necessary. So I guess I disagree with all the poll choices.

    Post # 11
    9824 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    Once BOTH people agree to get married!

    Post # 12
    7695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Darling Husband and I knew we were going to get married for a number of years, I wouldn’t have considered us engaged. We would even talk about aspects of our future wedding. An engagement to me means there has been a proposal and the other person has said yes, with or without a ring.

    Post # 14
    2701 posts
    Sugar bee

    I’m with KatyElle on this. Both parties have to agree to become married. I’ve seen so many women engrossed in the idea of marriage that they kind of drag the poor guy along until he is forced to propose out of fear haha.

    Post # 15
    3461 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    When he [or she] proposes and the offer is accepted

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