(Closed) What really matters? And what really doesn’t?

posted 8 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

What mattered:




What didn’t:



Music (he messed it up and I was annoyed but didn’t really care too much)

Post # 4
408 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Whats matters:




What doesn’t:



Post # 5
2058 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Great post – Posts like these really help ‘lighten’ the stresses when planning, if you all know what I mean (for those of us still planning.)

What Matters To Me –

  • Dress
  • Food
  • Music
  • Photography
  • Cocktail Hour – – – for some reason this has me hung up b/c I know we’ll be taking pictures and won’t be able to share a lot of the time with everyone. We are doing a first look but for some reason this Cocktail Hour really has me stressed!!!!

What Doesn’t Matter To Me –

  • Desert
  • Party Favors
  • Decor

Post # 6
2634 posts
Sugar bee

Things that matter MOST to us:

– Photography

– Food

– Cake (very imporant to Fiance to have awesome cake)

Things we’re just “eh” about:

– Flowers (only doing personal flowers)

– Transportation (hopefully using FI’s brothers classic car, but if we can’t – oh well)

– Invites (important, but I wasn’t willing to spend a TON on them)

Post # 7
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What matters:


Food & Drinks



Don’t matter





Post # 8
1982 posts
Buzzing bee

Matters: food, photography, people enjoying themselves, comfy shoes, weather cooperating

Doesn’t matter: flowers, dress, whether people actually like my paper stuff, DJ (to an extent)

I’m pretty go with the flow, so the “doesn’t matter” list is getting a little less attention.

Post # 9
384 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m still super early in the process, but I’d like to think I’ve got a handle on what’s important to me.  Though I’m willing to admit this stuff may change.

What Matters:

The Dress


Well Cared for Guests having an awesome time — This would include food, alcohol, music, and venue.

What I’m less concerned about:

Flowers, Cake, everything else.

Post # 10
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

What matters most to me

  • Food & Drinks
  • Music
  • Dress
  • Photography

What doesn’t matter

  • Centerpieces
  • Favors
  • Cake

Post # 11
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010


  • Venue
  • Music
  • Flowers
  • Ceremony
  • Pictures

Does not matter:

  • Favors
  • Invitations
  • Programs (not doing them)


Post # 12
2463 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

this post is great! writing this down just helped me calm myself down 🙂

our overall goal is that our family/friends feel important, appreciated, and included, and that the overall style reflects “us”

what matters:

venue/food (our venue is also our caterer)

the ceremony


flowers (i have a particular style i like–more organic/textured, less traditional and fussy)


bridesmaid dresses (in that they complement my dress and the bridesmaids are happy about them!)

that the website has info that makes it for the out of town guests to plan coming

invitation wording and style

our save the dates (because we made them and they’re very personal)

having a doc who will take over starting 6 weeks before and not let me stress on the day of!

what doesn’t matter (/what i will [try] not let myself stress about):

cake (we’re leaning towards cupcakes)

flowers for the ceremony venue (gorgeous enough on it’s own + chuppah + lots of bouquets)

chairs (fmil suggested we rent chiavari chairs even though the venue has perfectly fine ones…i want to fall down the rabbit hole and go for it, but thank goodness fi keeps assuring me it’s unnecessary…)

groomsmen attire (they won’t be matching exactly)

rehearsal dinner and brunch (fils are organizing these, and i’m so type-a i really want to do it myself, but i must accept that i don’t have control!)

std and invitation addressing–we’re handwriting them, and they aren’t perfect, and that’s okay with me

transportation (our venues are 4 blocks away from each other…yeah, it’ll be hot, but it’s only 4 blocks! people can walk or cab it…)

Post # 13
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

This was the first thing we talked about when we started planning.

What matters:

officiant (FI really wants his uncle to marry us)

location (I need it to be beautiful and comfortable for my guests)

having everyone there

portrait photos

heavy tasty hors d’oeuvres




wedding rings

invitations (traditional, not unique)

weather! I’ll be crushed if it rains!

Doesn’t matter:

flowers (see: beautiful location)



wedding party’s clothing (my bms are wearing whatever they want)

sit-down dinner

traditional wedding cake


photos during the day



throwing bouquet/other traditions

other alcohol (we have parties all the time where our friends can get trashed)

Post # 15
1732 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

What matters to us:

  • my dress
  • yummy cake
  • awesome photography
  • tons of flowers
  • trolley
  • big bridal party with all our friends

What didnt:

  • huge amounts of rented linens/uplighting
  • custom monogram
  • live band

What we wanted but don’t have the budget for:

  • chiavari chairs
  • custom stationary
  • traditional photobooth
  • couture gown

Post # 16
1207 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Mattered: photography, food, venue

Didn’t matter: decor, flowers, favors

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