(Closed) What % RSVP No?

posted 14 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
18 posts
  • Wedding: July 2008

Hi SoCalBride

I’ve heard between 10 and 20% won’t attend but you should never count on that either.  There was something on the knot under ask carley about it, but I can’t find it now.


Post # 4
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2007

I have also heard 10%.

I’ve been having a constant battle with my mom where I feel like I’m talking to a child.  We can ONLY have 200 people at our venue, and that is the absolute maximum for it to be comfortable.
"Here’s my list"
"Mom, we decided you can invite 60 people.  This is 100."
"It’s not 100!  Besides, not everyone will come."
"Mom, we can’t invite them if we potentially don’t have room for them.  I am not going to send them a Save the Date card, maybe they’ll get an invitation after the RSVPs start coming back."
then a week later she sends me a new list.
"Mom, this is still more than 60 people."
"Well I told you before, not all of them will come."
"And I told you were aren’t sending Save the Date cards to more people than we can have at the reception."
"Well, you put your sister and brother on your list…  and their families… and these cousins of yours…."
"Mom, that’s still 66 people"
At this point my head just wants to explode because she isn’t grasping the concept.
So yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s 10%, but I don’t want to chance it and send out an extra 10% of Save the Date cards and suddenly have more guests than room.

Post # 5
800 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think I’ll have a high "no" rate because our wedding will be a destination for about 60% of our guests. I’d bet that 40% of our guests won’t come.

Post # 6
37 posts
  • Wedding: June 2008

I think it really depends on how many guests are from out of town.   I did something really nerdy, which was estimate the percent chance that each guest would actually come, then add that number up.  I’ve read that people do that and they’re actually not that far off usually.  Anyway, I really hope people decline at higher than 10% or I’m kind of screwed!!

Post # 7
43 posts
  • Wedding: April 2008

I’ve heard 20% don’t attend, but I am sending out 250 invites for 200 spots. I already know, however, that we are inviting some people that definitely will not come. Since most of our guests are from out of town, I’m honestly more worried about having too few guests since our venue requires a 200 person minimum. I think the best thing we can do is try to find out, via word of mouth, how many people are intending to attend.

Post # 8
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I heard 20% a couple different places.  I sure hope its near that amount because I’ll have issues otherwise.  I know one of the girls at work says her’s worked out to 20% exactly. 

Post # 9
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I would guess it probably has something to do with the number of people you invite too.  If you only invite 60 people, then chances are those are the people closest to you and they will go through great lengths to be with you on your day.  If you invite 300 people, you probably have some people who you have never even met!   So if they have something else to do that day, they probably will.  Ok, this wasnt helpful

Post # 10
370 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

hmmm good question! I’ve also heard 20% won’t attend, and I think 3-5% of RSVP "yes" also won’t come.

I’ve been really confused on an estimate as well. Is there a percentage for out of towners? or does it depend on the relationship???

We are inviting 150 total, but half of those are out-of-towners.  As went over the list with my Future Mother-In-Law, she told me "invite but probably won’t come". But what if they DO come? aye aye aye….. 


Post # 11
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2007 - The Wellington House in Fayetteville, NY

Our invite list was over 300 people and we had about half of them come to the wedding. 

But that’s mostly because we invited ALL of Mr. Radish’s first cousins… and there are like a hundred of them.  He barely even knows most of them, so we didn’t really expect they would come, but his parents really wanted us to invite them all as a courtesy. 

Also, we invited a lot of our friends who live all over the country and we didn’t really expect most of them would be able to make it but we didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by not inviting them.  Surprisingly, many of this group did come. Probably of about 75% of people that fell into this category actually came, which was more than we expected.  I think we ended up having almost as many friends there as we did family.  

So anyway, I think it depends on the circumstances of your wedding such as how many people will have to travel and how far, are you inviting people (such as cousins) that you aren’t very close to, etc. 


Post # 12
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

that’s my problem too.. i mean i like to know who’s coming and just overinviting ppl for the hopes of 20% ppl not showing is risky.  because there is the "what if" factor and then you would be out of luck.  I have an A and B list to help me with that.  I am going to invite a comfortable amount of ppl a little over my 150 limit and have them RSVP a little bit early than my wedding, like probably 3 weeks earlier so that I have time to invite ppl on my B list when I get some no’s back.  "A" list are ppl that want to be there for sure and that I hang out with the most and "B" list is that they don’t have to be there, but it would be nice to share the occassion with them too.  for me, I’ve heard 25% is the number to use but I rather do 10%.  my 1st dilemna when putting a guest list was that I felt like anyone who I met socially needed to be invited, which is ridiculous bc I barely knew them and only on the occassions of group hang outs.  My 2nd dileman is having to invite ppl who I know aren’t showing up and be a wasted invitation since I am making them all.  I rather send invites to the ppl who are coming. I definitely kept distance of travel in mind like ppl who are further away to not have them travel so far unless they are really really close friends.  Attending a wedding is expensive when you add up all the travel costs as well as the gifts and I don’t want that to be a burden on any guest. 

Post # 14
8 posts
  • Wedding: July 2007

I agree with 20% not coming.  Higher percentages, obviously, for a destination wedding. 

Post # 15
67 posts
Worker bee

WAIT – ihave another question…

waht about the people who dont RSVP despite emails and follow-up calls and then show up???

ok i just had to add to the mix – my wedding planner says between 10-20% dont accept the invite…depends on time of year, how far to travel and age of guests (seniors who cant make the trip of new families with babies who cant makle the trip)

Post # 16
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

We are going to end up with (I am projecting) probably about 115-120 people after inviting 165, which looks like an enormous "no" rate (30%).  I was kind of horrified (doesn’t anyone love us? :-), but then I realized that 18 of our invitations were sent to single people who were invited "with guest".  Only one of those people is actually bringing a guest, which, right there, is 17 "people", or 10%, saying no even though the invitee actually said yes.  So definitely keep the number of unnamed "guests" in mind when figuring out who might come and who might not!

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