- 10 years ago
- Wedding: September 2008
I need some advice.
I’m having a bit of an issue with the fiance (let’s call her Jane) of FH’s friend (Tim). Just to preface the issue – Jane and I are not friends. We are civil when we see eachother, but that’s about it. FH and Tim are not close friends. It’s one of those friendships where you have known someone since you are 5, and you see each other occasionally, but don’t ever call each other or hang out just on your own.
About 2 months ago Jane had her (first) bridal shower. I did not really want to go, as I am not friends with her, and was only going to know one person there (who I have not been friends with since we were 10). Anyway, I got Jane a gift and went to her shower because it was the right thing to do. I stayed about 2 1/2 hours (I had already informed Jane that I would be unable to stay for the entire shower, because I had an appointment which is true). So I waited until the brunch was over, she had opened my gift and several others before I left.
Now my shower is being held in about a month. I learned from a friend of mine (Carrie), that Jane does not want to attend my shower. She told Carrie that if she isn’t going to go, to let her know, because she wont’ know anyone and she doesn’t want to go anyway.
I am super upset about this. She should go because I went to hers. She doesn’t have to stay – just pop in for a half an hour – the venue is literally 2 minutes from her house. It’s not even about a gift – it’s about the fact that I showed her and Tim enough respect to go to her shower, and now she is saying she’s probably not coming to mine???
Not to mention, Jane and Tim registered for practically everything in the store. Then at this party on the weekend, they proceeded to brag to everyone there (no one at the party had gone to the shower) that they had received "So much useless S*%& at the shower" that they returned ALL OF IT and bought a big screen HD tv. (AND they are still having another shower, a stag and doe they are throwing THEMSELVES and a housewarming party).
My feeling is that if Jane does not come to my shower, that I do not want to invite her to the wedding. Her wedding is just over a month after ours, and I would not plan to attend hers either.
Please tell me bees – what would you do??