Post # 1
Im a 16 year old girl and my mom has been working on other countries and I stayed with my grandmother all my life. My mother met a guy and they live together. They’ve been together about 5 or 6 years but they broke up because the guy keep saying bad things about my mom but then he begs my mom to come back to him so my mom decided to go back and then my mom wants me to be with her and his live in partner. So I’m staying with them even if I dont wanna stay with them and i dont wanna leave my grandmother and my country. At first my stepdad is nice bit then after a week I saw his true colors . My stepdad keep saying lots of terrible things. He’s calling my mom a “dumb bitch” and everytime they fight he always swear a lot and tell. They always even fight about small things. And the other problem about him is that, he always drink and smoke marijuana (it’s legal here). There was a time that we went to far place for 3 days without my mom because she cant go, my stepdad is smoking marijuana knowing that I’m with him and he’s driving and after one hour he will smoke cigarettes and I dont like it. Sometimes he complains about my moms cooking because he wants something else to eat. He even bully my mom because of her english. He is really bossy, he thinks that he knows everything. If we I’d something that he dont like he will get really mad and keep saying that we’re spoiled. He is a verbal abusive and alcoholic man.
Post # 2
oh hunni, its good that you recognise his behaviour is abusive. You sound very mature for a 16 year old.
It can be very hard for people in this sort of relationship to see the problems or leave, so your mum might not be willing to leave him. Know that this is part of the abuse cycle, it doesnt mean your mum doesnt care. Your priority will need to be your own wellbeing.
Is there anyway you can tell your grandma whats going on, or go back to living with her or a family member? If not, is there a teacher or someone you trust that you can talk to about it?
In the meantime, try and stay out of his way as much as you can. Its not your fault that hes like this.
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2019 - City, State
I’m so sorry you’re having to live there, bee. You’re absolutely right that his behavior is not good, or normal. Unfortunately your mom is not making very good choices, but sometimes people do that because they can’t see what’s really happening in front of them. It’s very hard, and I’m sorry that you’re sort of stuck in the middle.
Can you contact your grandmother and ask her to help you? Do you have any other relatives you could speak to?
Post # 4
oh no, it’s not good, but you can do much either. your mom should be able to differentiate and take initiative too, not receiving every negative names that your stepdad has been calling her. and i’d suggest you not to hang out very often with your stepdad, he’s a bad influence really.
Post # 5
Talk to a teacher or school counselor. Tell them what you told us..Tell them you’re afraid of him.