(Closed) What to ask officiant?

posted 3 years ago in Secular
Post # 2
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Maybe ask how free you are to edit/revise/combine what he has to offer? Like if you like parts of some, is he flexible or does it have to follow exactly?

and I’d ask if he will take care of filling in details, and sending in your certificate to get certified? Our officiant messed up a couple details so it’s just something I think of.  All we cared about was signing our names and didn’t notice and had to straighten out minor details with our county government later 🙂

overall, it sounds like you’ve done your research, so it sounds like he’ll be a good fit for you all!

Post # 3
9736 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I just met with the officiant we decided to hire on Tuesday.

The only big questions I had for him were – can we write our own vows and how flexible is he with what is included in the ceremony. Other than that I was mostly looking to see if I liked him as a person. 

Post # 4
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I don’t have questions per se, but I would say go with your gut. We used the officiant our venue recommends/works with, and off the bat I kind of didn’t vibe with him, but he was convenient and it was one less thing for me to worry about. We wanted a short sweet and to the point ceremony, and in the end he ended up talking a lot and adding his own jokes etc. and while all the guests loved it I found it a little annoying, as though he had his own agenda a little bit. If I had a do over I wouldn’t have used him.

Post # 5
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Haha I basically gave ours a behavioural job interview. I asked stuff like ‘in the event (insert terrible wedding day disaster) happens, what would you do’. I found ours had a plan and experience for any disaster that could happen and on the day she was super calm and got everyone in the right place at the right time. I also liked that she had worked at our venue heaps of times before so knew her way arpund and how to set it up etc. My Darling Husband said it was probably the most serious interview she would have done with a client but it helped me not to stress lol

Post # 7
3305 posts
Sugar bee

Ask what they wear for weddings that are formal/less formal etc.

Maybe also their availability for a rehearsal too?

If they have a microphone etc 

Post # 8
202 posts
Helper bee

I’d definitely make sure you can write your own vows if that’s something you’re interested in, how involved you’re allowed to be in the development process-can you add input or is it his way or the highway? I’d also probably ask about his experience in general. As in, if something went wrong, how would you go about handling it? What happens if he gets sick the day of the wedding, etc.  

I’d definitely go with your gut though. Make sure you all mesh well, you feel like he’s interested and invested in you and your partner, that you all are on the same page as far as beliefs and what you both want out of the ceremony and you’ll be fine. I say that because we interviewed a prospective officiant that we looooved as a person and thought we were on the same page with, but weren’t. When we began talking about things he made it clear to us that he had several non-negotiable religious points he felt the need to make throughout ceremony that we just didn’t agree or feel comfortable with.

Post # 10
1988 posts
Buzzing bee

ana2017:  awesome! I would ask how long his ceremonies usually take. 

I wanted mine short but not so much that it felt hurried. I’d also ask if he has anyone that he trust that could cover him in case a major event happens. He gets sick or something. 


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