Post # 1
So we’ve been married just over 2 years now. We recently found out that my MIL’s aunt put aside some money to leave to my husband and his sister as she doesn’t have any kids. My FIL had us over to dinner tonigth and asked me to sign a post-nup. In fact, he had already spoken to a lawyer! I was so livid that I refused to talk about it with them or with my husband. What do you girls think?
Post # 3
I personally think it’s absolutely appalling that your FIL made this request. It’s really none of his business, at all.
If you’re HUSBAND wanted to bring the subject up with you, that’s one thing. I personally am not open to signing any kind of pre/post- nup agreements (nor would my FI be interested in having one drawn up for any reason), but I’d be way less upset about discussing it if my FI brought it up. It’s none of his father’s business in the least.
Post # 4
What does your husband say about it? I think it is pretty appalling to ask you to sign a post nup. Seriously! If you stay together, wouldn’t the oneh be split between you anyway? Does he think you are breaking up? If my FIL made such a request of me, I would be upset.
Post # 5
Did your husband know about this, or was he as surprised as you were? It sounds like a very awkward situation, the inheritance is for your husband, not your FIL. Why is he contacting lawyers, etc?
Post # 6
@aliu19: Talk to your DH. His dad’s actions are WAY overstepping boundaries. It is none of his business. I’m not a fan of prenupts, but a postnupt is….really really insulting. ESPECIALLY as it wasn’t your DH who brought this up. There are very specific situations where I think that this would be acceptable, but they still involve your DH being the one to talk to you…not your FIL. This really REALLY has nothing to do with him.
This may be over-reacting, but after talking to your DH, I might consider going to see a lawyer yourself. You obviously shouldn’t sign anything without having your own lawyer look at the documents. You could also see the lawyer to find out what your rights are with regards to the inheritance and to speak with them about what your FIL is up to. Basically, you want to cover your butt here.
Post # 7
Wow, tell him to keep the money in a separate account but you aren’t signing anything. And honestly, postnups don’t usually hold up in court. Don’t sign anything…. What is he going to do…? Divorce you? It is funny how money can show someone’s real colors.
Post # 8
Edit, I see this is your FIL. Don’t sign anything and ignore them. This is between you and your husband.
Post # 9
I would be upset. It’s not your FIL’s money if your aunt is willing it to your husband. If my husband wanted a post-nup, then he would have to come to me and discuss it privately. I’m not sure how I would respond, though I’m not interested that much in money, so I’d probably be cool with signing it.
Post # 10
If this were me I would be livid. It’s none of FIL’s business and it’s insulting. Something like this is between you and your husband and should be discussed privately.
Post # 11
Hi ladies… I spoke with my husband – I actually kept him up all night with my ranting. He was shocked too and assured me that he doesn’t want to do anything of the kind. He called my FIL this morning to hash it out with him and tell him to mind his own beeswax. Thank you bees! I was livid and wanted to make sure that I wasn’t being overly defensive.
Post # 12
I agree with all the other posts that bringing this up is ridiculous and completely out of bounds. *However*, as an aside, in most states inheritances are considered to be the sole property of the person who inherits *if* the money is kept in a completely separate account. If you mingle the money, it becomes community property, but if you keep it in your own name in its own account, your spouse does not have any rights over it. I would consult a lawyer in my own state if I were inheriting a large sum of money after I was married and had any questions.