(Closed) What to do??

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee

@s2bmrscook:  they are both single, there for no +1 required IMO πŸ™‚

Post # 5
Member
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You don’t have to give a plus 1 to anyone you don’t want to.

Post # 6
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Are they still legally married? If so, then they don’t need a +1 πŸ™‚

If they aren’t, then honestly it depends. Are you extending plus ones to everyone else? Are you just sending them to living together/engaged/married couples?

Post # 8
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Totally okay especially as they seem to break up and get back together again on a frequent basis.

 

Post # 9
Member
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Don’t extend the +1.  Just say you had done the head count based on them being together, invitations are sent/printed/whatever and it’s just too late to add anyone to the list.  If they bring it up, apologize profusely, be as gracious as you can manage, and then bitch them out to yourself while you’re stuck in traffic later, or come back on here and bitch them to the internet.

You don’t need anyone using your wedding to draw attention to themselves.

Post # 10
Member
1966 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I wouldn’t extend a plus one. Dont think you broke any rules with your save the dates. I’ve never seen “& guest” on a save the date anyway. 

Post # 11
Member
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Seriously, are they still legally married?

Honestly, most people will preach that if you extend plus ones to everyone then there should be no exceptions. But, in this case, I would just let them know that for the comfort and benefit of the other person/not budgeting for additional guests that you won’t be able to. Have either one asked about it?

Post # 12
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Duncan:  << THIS!! 

 

I might however send him his own STD and invite but make sure there are no +1’s on either of their invites because from what you have shared with us they will probably be back together by then anyway and their drama shouldnt have you worried about numbers etc for the caterer 

Post # 13
Member
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I definitely wouldn’t extend them a plus one, and since you have already sent out your save the dates you can tell them your guest list and numbers have already been finalized.  Just make sure they are seated far apart.  I think if each of them brought a date, it could very easily end up in a lot of drama/them trying to one-up the other and that kind of thing.  Your wedding is definitely not the setting for that kind of drama, so I vote to just keep things simple.  

Post # 14
Member
8694 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@s2bmrscook:  1000% ok if you do not extend +1.

we only gave +1’s to people who are in committed relationships, engaged, living together, or married.

no extra people invited to my wedding.

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