(Closed) What to do about a breakfast we can't afford?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What should we do
    1 - Cancel the breakfast : (16 votes)
    10 %
    2 - Golden Corral and everyone pay for themselves - I'll tell you how to word it in a comment below! : (12 votes)
    7 %
    3 - Host a basic continental breakfast in the backyard : (140 votes)
    83 %
  • Post # 3
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I feel like #3 is the only option. You already send the STD’s with the info, so you can’t cancel. And unfortunately #2 is out, because with wedding-related events you can’t expect guests to pay for themselves. Best of luck getting this sorted, but I think #3 is a great solution!

    Post # 4
    2955 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 1998

    @JenGirl:  I’d do the third option. It’s definetly the better way to go:)

    Post # 5
    951 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @phillybride61513:  +1

    #3 is your best bet. You can do #3 very inexpensively if you do the continental breakfast style. Buy bulk yogurt, milk, orange juice, bread and fruit from Costco. Enlist the help of your family in baking and setting up.

    Post # 6
    822 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Third option only because on the STD is is sort of implied that you’re hosting. I don’t have an issue with paying for my own breakfast the day after a wedding so if it wasn’t on the STD, I would say all meet up at a restaurant and everyone pays for their own meal. 

    Post # 7
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    #3 Definitely.  Plug in a griddle and put a couple dozen eggs in a bowl and have a DIY omelette station if you want, but keep it casual.  Think Holiday Inn Express.  🙂

    There are all kinds of recipies on Pinterest for overnight french toast.  I’m here to tell you that shit is tasty.  Also… you can make it way ahead of time and freeze it.  Just pull it out the night before (or earlier if it’s cool) when you go to bed and leave it on the counter, then throw it in the oven in the morning (takes like an hour so you could do a couple rounds with a 9×13 or two in at once). 

    Post # 8
    3574 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I have been to many morning after breakfasts where it was a kind of show up and pay your own way type of thing.  I don’t think it matters what was on the save the date.   The last wedding I was at, the bride and groom said, we’ll be eating tomorrow in the hotel if you anyone wants to come down and see us.  So a lot of people came down, bought their own breakfast, and had some time to say goodbye to the couple.  I don’t think it’s a big deal.  If there is a hotel block, you could do something like that.

    ETA:  I really don’t think you would want to be setting up or hosting a DIY brunch the morning after your wedding. 


    Post # 9
    5014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Definitely #3!!

    Post # 10
    279 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    #3 sounds awesome! I’d much rather have a continental breakfast in someone’s backyard than go to Golden Corral, anyway.

    Post # 11
    11284 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @JenGirl:  i think having a simple backyard brunch would be the best idea.  assorted pastries and muffins with preserves, fruit trays, yogurt, juice, coffee & tea.  if it’s in your budget, i would also get heating trays and offer bacon, sausages, scrambled eggs or a frittata and maybe a tray of lasagna or some quiche.

    i would also suggest that you have your guests rsvp for the brunch as well so that you know how much food you will be needing.

    Post # 12
    955 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    So…this brunch is only listed on the STDs?  Have the invitations gone out yet?


    I ask because sometimes plans do change from the time the STD and the invitations are drafted.  That’s totally ok in my book.


    Honestly, if you haven’t sent out the formal invitations yet, I’d just cancel the breakfast completely.  I know brides who spend a lot of money designing and drafting their STDs aren’t going to want to hear this, but when I get a STD in the mail, I make note of it on my calendar on my iphone then it goes in the trash.  I tend to go more so by the itinerary on the actual invitation anyway!!

    Post # 13
    1857 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Third option. It’ll be cheaper than hosting anywhere else, and the general consensus is when you’ve invited someone to something, you should be hosting/paying.

    There are lots of easy things to do – get a bunch of bagels and pastries, fruit, juice, and coffee. If you want a warm dish or a main dish, PP’s suggestions of make-ahead things like french toast, etc. I’ve made this French toast which is easy and cheap (I do it without alcohol). You could do quiches or baked eggs – the trick would be to use things with inexpensive ingredients.

    Post # 14
    1433 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    I think it’s sweet of you to want to host a breakfast but I think that in light of yoru new situation, it’s really ok to cancel the breakfast altogether.  Most people don’t keep the STDs and I doubt anyone will remember the breakfast enough to ask about it if it doesn’t show up on the invite.  However, if you still feel strongly about holding the breakfast, I agree with the PPs that #3 should work.

    Post # 15
    8469 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Another vote for option #3, you could probably go to Costco and load up on bagels, pastries, muffins, mini quiches, etc and only be out a few hundred dollars.  Best of luck to your FI with the job hunt.

    Post # 16
    9145 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    @JenGirl:  You could easily do #3 (cancel cable for the next 2-3 months if you have to.)  You would be surprised how cheap a basic spread from Sam’s Club or BJ’s can be.  Also, making a few casseroles would also be cheap and feed a bunch.

    You could host it super early so people are likely to still be sleeping.

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