Post # 1
- Wedding: June 2015 - Restaurant
I just received a confirmation from one of my guests (our confirmation deadline was last week) saying that she is comming to our wedding and adding that she is an ovo-lacto vegetarian. We didn’t ask for that information on our RSVP card, so I don’t know why she told me that :/ She is an extended cousing whom I haven’t seen in a long time. Neither her mom -who talks regularly with my mom- told us about her being an ovo-lacto vegetarian.
We are getting married at a restaurant -also our venue- so our options for catering where limited to what the restaurant could offer us. We ended up deciding for a lasagña with salad and ceviche as an entree. We discussed prices and my parents (they are paying for the wedding) bought 100 dishes. We never thought about people who didn’t eat meat as we were unaware of anyone in our families with such preferences. I am not sure we can change one dish without adding up to the cost, and I also don’t feel is fair for other guests (I like the “same treatment for all guests” idea, except our parents). The venue also doesn’t allow for food to be brought in from the outside.
I don’t know how to tell her that we can’t provide her with a special dish. I also find rude for guests to expect special treatment :/ The pro of our venue is the fact that -since it is a restaurant- she could order something from the venue and they could make it for her on the spot, but she would have to pay for it (the prices are around 30 to 50 dlls per dish). Should I tell her so? I am not to close to this guest, and I really don’t know how to handle this situation. Anyone who could help me? I know I ask a lot of questions but I have hardly ever been to a wedding and I no one that I know has gotten married (except parents and uncles/aunts years ago).
Post # 2
Have you asked the venue if they can accommodate her without a huge cost to you? Vegetarian is not uncommon and most ppl accommodate. Idk what the first part means?
Post # 3
You are the hostess. You should treat her the same way as if you invited her to your home for adinner party. Nomally you ask potential guests about allergies and dietary restrictions.
It is unfortunate that you did not ask about dietary restrictions on your rsvp card, but now you know.
Phone the venue and ask what they can provide that would meet her needs. Any restaurant should be able to make something- an omelette and a salad would work.
Post # 4
Ovo lacto means she eats eggs and milk products
Post # 5
Talk to the restuarant first. Vegetarians are common nowadays and are easily accommodates without an additional charge. Same as if someone had a seafood allergy, restuarants know to accommodate. Ovo lacto simply means it’s a vegetarian who consumes milk and eggs, sometimes its easier to clarify in these situations.
Post # 6
Ovo lacto means she does eat eggs and dairy. Talk to your venue, I’d be very surprised if they weren’t willing to work with you on this.
Also, in my opinion, you’re not being a very gracious host if you refuse to accommodate a vegetarian or make her pay for her meal on the night.
Post # 7
Honestly, it would be very easy for your restaurant to make one of the lasagnas meat-free. You just need to ask them. If you are going to have her order from the menu, it is your responsibility as a hostess to pay. She is your guest, and she is not asking for special treatment, just that you respect her dietary restrictions.
Post # 8
- Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter\'s Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle
Call your venue. They may be able to subsitute a vegetarian lasagne or something similar without additional cost. I’m not sure why you think it’s rude to expect special treatment – one of my bridesmaids is coeliac and if I don’t provide a special meal for her she would go hungry – which I personally think would be incredibly rude on my part. I guess the difference is that she’s not coeliac by choice, wherease I presume your cousin is vegetarian by choice? She shouldn’t have to go hungry, though.
Post # 9
It doesn’t matter if you did or didnt know any of your guests had special dietary requirements, the fact is one has. I wouldn’t call being a vegetarian a “special diet” she would just prefer to not eat meat. Most places these days are equipped to deal with alternative diets, especially vegetarian, so just call your venue and talk to them.
Post # 10
i’m sure the venue can meet their needs.. it doesn’t hurt to ask. It is likely a cheaper option for the venue and for you if they end up charging you separately.
I have a special diet and always request it and if anyone said they couldn’t accomodate I would probably be highly offended or wouldn’t show up. or would leave early. Why go to dinner if I can’t eat anything.
Post # 11
It’s not “special treatment” to accommodate someone’s dietary restrictions. I’m sure your venue can handle it, especially since it’s a restaurant.
Post # 12
I don’t think anyone is asking to be treated specially. What if it was an allergy? I have two guests who are vegetarian, and two with severe peanut allergies. The venue is used to dealing with “special” requests. I wouldn’t expect ANY guest of mine to pay for their own meal. Please try to accomodate your guest. It’s not that they’re being difficult. It’s better for you to know before hand than to be blindsided the day of. If the venue has ample notice, they can accomodate for pretty much anything.
Post # 13
It’s just one person. I would not cater to a single person.
Post # 14
You’re hosting – you need to accommodate. Like one of the PP said, you didn’t ask for it on your RSVP/response cards which a lot of people do. It’s very common to be vegetarian nowadays and she’s told you prior to the event: better than her getting there and making a fuss.
She has a simple request and you should meet it. I used to work in the restaurant business and it’s not an issue. And it does usually make it cheaper for us.
I have two vegans, one vegetarians, one peanut allergy, quite a few seafoods (but we avoided it for this reason) and a tomato allergy. Our alternate drop venue has been completely fine. They’re all normal intolerances.
None of your other guests will sit there and ask themselves why they weren’t offered that meal. They’ll guess it’s because she has an allergy / preference.
Post # 15
Why did you not ask guests if they had dietry restrictions? You are serving raw fish so you better hope none of your guests are pregnant or have a seafood allery. The kitchen, since they are working with seafood, would need to know this so they don’t cross-contaminate and nearly kill someone. Some people also have trouble metabolising the enzymes in meat and that is why they are vegetarian.
I really hope you never get pregnant, have a child with an allergy or develop an intolerance or allergy yourself but then again it might teach you some compassion. For some people not eating or being in the presence of certain foods is not so much about choice but about survival.