(Closed) What to do?? Help Please…

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1595 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

goodluck you brave, brave girl

Post # 4
Member
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Dell79:  Oh yeah…this is probably not going to go well. *ducks out before it starts!*

Post # 6
Member
716 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

My personal opinion is if you want it, you have to be willing to get it yourself. He offered you what he did for his reasons (and if you must ask him, then ask him). But if you want the 1.5 RBC in a halo then YOU should pay for it, which means you need to get into your job and save up for it.

And yea, this could cause some drama, so watch out…

Post # 7
Member
624 posts
Busy bee

It’s not about the ring it’s about the relationship!  If you want more bling then save and spend up on the wedding band.  At your age you have so so much more to be thinking about than the size of your engagment ring I promise. xx

Post # 8
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Honestly, my ring is 1/5 of a carat and was $324 for the band and ring. We are both in college, and trying to save for a home as well, so I am perfectly content on how much money was spent on my ring. I did tell him that I wanted an upgrade on our 10 year anniversary.

Your fiance seems to have grown up with no gifts, so maybe he expects that everyone was raised that way. If you want him to spend some on you for presents, tell him. $1,000 for him was probably very expensive in his mind, and I think you should be a bit more grateful.

Post # 9
Member
3303 posts
Sugar bee

How about you be grateful and buy yourself your own 1.5 ideal cut if you still want one that bad. I am generally not one to look down on upgrading, especially if you can’t afford the ring you want at the time HOWEVER your fiancé doesn’t want to upgrade and thinks he spend enough on your ring…. Therefore you be grateful and hush about it. Buy your own if you really want one. This is the type of man you are marrying. If you re not happy/ satisfied, return the ring and find someone who will buy a 1.5 ideal cut.

 

Post # 10
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Hm. maybe you should focus more on your Fiance and why you love him, why he proprosed and why you said yes as opposed to obsessing about a ring and the size.

This post makes you sound very very shallow and very very young.

Yes, your Fi could spend more money, but who are you to say he should spend all of his money on you?

You really seem to want more “stuff” from your Fi, so why are with him if he is clearly not giving you what you “need”?

Post # 11
Member
7291 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Communication is key!

Personally, I don’t think you should get married any time soon ( with the attitude and expectations you’ve established) and I also think you should tell your partner exactly what your telling us.

Post # 12
Member
1728 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

1/2 carat isn’t really small, especially with a halo. It sounds beautiful. Could we see a picture? 

Have you priced your “dream ring”? Is it attainable now with your current incomes and budget? If not, it might be a good idea to wait a few years and upgrade for an upcoming anniversary – like 5 years or 10 years. Just an idea. 

If your dream ring truly is within the budget and you want to ask your Fiance for an upgrade sooner, I’d be very careful in the way that you bring it up as to not seem unappreciative of the ring he did choose for you. 

Post # 14
Member
721 posts
Busy bee

WE CAN’T AFFORD THE RING I REALLY WANT.

Straight from the horse’s mouth.  That’s why you have a .5 carat ring.  If you wanted a bigger one, you should have put off getting the ring or getting engaged until he could have afforded it.  I’m not sure telling him is going to change anything because neither of y’all can afford a 1.5 carat ideal cut upgrade (which will be ridiculously expensive, diamonds jump up crazy amounts in price the bigger they are…as in a .5 might cost a 1,000 and a 1 with the same stats might be 4x that).  

Basically, you can’t have it right now because you’re in college and college kids are poor and poor college kids do not get 1.5 carat diamonds no matter what they “deserve.”  Wait until you’re not a poor college kid before upgrading.  

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