(Closed) What to do when someone thinks they’re invited to the wedding?

posted 12 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
22 posts
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Orange County Performing Arts Center

If you don’t want to invite her, you may want to be honest with her as soon as possible.  Otherwise, if you tell her later she’s not invited or worse yet, she finds out from someone else your invitations were mailed, she might be really offended that you knew this whole time that she wouldn’t be invited, yet let her buy you a present, win money for your honeymoon (although this was probably a joke), etc.  

I’d suggest to either invite her or tell her she’s not invited b/c of space or whatever the issue may be.

Post # 4
3928 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I would just invite her anyway. It is very nice of her to purchase you a gift.

Post # 6
2220 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

You know what they say when you assume….

I would tell her she’s not invited ASAP so she stops dropping $$ on you & your FH! 🙂 It’s extremely generous of her, but if she’s just your co-worker and you aren’t close, it’s somewhat inappropriate! You don’t want this to strain your working relationship!!

Also, is there a reason she thinks she’s invited? Do you bring up wedding details & plans to her on your lunch break, etc? I’d definitely watch what you say about wedding plans in general to avoid hurt feelings.

Post # 7
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

This is my BIGGEST pet peeve lately.  I don’t think people realize how expensive weddings really are until you are planning your own!  People always ask me if they can come, and co-workers tell me how excited they are for my wedding. UGHHH. If I was in your situation I would probably just invite her, but I am your classic doormat when it comes to stuff like that.

Post # 8
5592 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Hmm… maybe she was tasked with picking up the group gift from all your co-workers, and they’re all going to chip in 10 bucks to pay for the $125 present??  One can only hope, right?

I think it’s probably fine to just casually mention that you’re having a “small” wedding, and only inviting close friends and family.

Post # 9
47 posts
  • Wedding: May 2010

Seems like you have a few options:

Hint that you’re having a very very small wedding of immediate family and a few long-time friends and hope she gets the hint.

Invite her.  If it’s just her, and not a plus-one, then it shouldn’t be horribly expensive to add her to the guest list.  That is, if you even want her there!

If she comes right out and asks if she’s invited, you could say you wished you could, but your fiance nixed inviting coworkers because of the budget.  

The guest list is a tough line to walk on a budget!  But it’s your budget, so you and your fiance make the call.  What does he think?

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