Post # 1
My youngest first cousin is 8. Her family said they’d make it to our wedding if it was in the first half of May. Her mom/my aunt happened to be at my grandparents’ house when I called to tell them. I really didn’t care to have a flower girl, but it just spilled out of my mouth… “Would Maija like to be a flower girl?” And she is STOKED about it. Her dress is yellow, and her hair clips will be pink – her favorite colors.
This past week, my volunteer photographer/oldest first cousin told my mom about her daughter’s dress – it’s a pink tulle ballgown. Adorable. So my mom asks me “can we make Madeline a flower girl?” OK, fine (even though I really dislike pink. I’ve also never met her.) Then my mom starts saying that she really doubts Madeline can figure out a flower girl’s duties.
So here’s my question. We have 50 some odd guests, and 7 attendants counting Maija. Can just we have Madeline, the apparently-not-too-bright 3 year old, hand out bubbles to people as they go through the receiving line? Should we have her as an additional flower girl? Should I tell my mom we can include Madeline in the hair portion of our prep but just let her sit with her grandpa?
My wedding is in 12 days, so I’d appreciate some quick advice!
Post # 4
We have a couple of my FI’s cousin’s girls doing what we call “Celebration Girls” – they’re helping to hand out programs and hand out bubbles afterwards. They get all the “perks” of being a flower girl (gifts, corsage, etc.) they just don’t have to walk down the aisle.
Post # 5
I think it kinda depends on what “Madeline” has been told. If she thinks she is going to get to be a flower girl, then she’ll probably be very sad and disappointed if she only gets to pass out bubbles or hangout.
Post # 6
Um, she’s three. I don’t think she’s “not that bright” but that you can’t expect much from such a little one.
Post # 7
We are having 2 flower girls, but they will be ages 6 and 7. Ours will walk down the aisle togther and wear the same dresses.
I would be just as worried about a 3 year old passing out bubbles as walking down the aisle. A lot of kida are shy and that could effect either task.
I also think it’s a little weird since you don’t even know this kid. Just because her mother bought her a pretty dress, I’m not sure that elevates her to flower girl status.
Now, no matter what you decide, I think it will be fine, just make a decision you can live with and stick with it. But if it were me, I would retract the three year old’s offer. I would tell my mother first and explain that you’re excited about the photographer and are sure the little girl will look adorable. You can suggest the bubble idea as well, but remember, at the actual event, the kid might be shy about going up to strangers to give our bubbles, so have a contingency basket people can take them from or something. After I spoke with my mother, I would either have her call the photographer or call her myself. Explain that you are sure the kid will look beautifula nd you are excited she is attending the wedding and are so excited that the photographer will be playing a part as well. Flatter her some by saying you love her work or something. But then say that you had already made plans for a flower girl and felt on the spot and caught of guard when your mother initially asked about it. While she would be adorable, maybe there is something else that would work better and then suggest the bubble idea.
I actually think it’s a little inappropriate of you mother to ask to put a strangers kid in the wedding just because she’s cute.
Post # 8
Did your mom even talk to the photographer/cousin about the flower girl thing? If not, tell mom to forget it. Otherwise, she will probably be disappointed.
I had our 3 nieces as flower girls–3, 4 and 7. They all did just fine. The 3 year old had no problem tossing flowers.
Post # 9
I should note that neither she nor her mom have been asked about the flower girl thing. My mom just thought it would be sweet, and intended to ask once they get there. We already have appropriate gift/accesories for both girls (my mom bought the little one gifts because she knows and adores the little one.) I wouldn’t really expect her to toss flowers. Just to walk down the aisle to her grandpa (I figured that was within her capabilities, especially with all that I’ve heard about her – aside from my mom’s comment. My mom’s flower girl was that age.) If she is a full flower girl, she’ll walk down the aisle with Maija. None of the dresses match each other, so the dress style doesn’t matter.
I’ve kept up with Madeline as much as I ever kept up with her mom – my dad was Air Force and Madeline’s grandpa was Navy, then I was Army. Me not having met her is par for the course, but I keep up with their family on facebook.
Also, the bubbles are mostly for kids. I wanted birdseed, and I was in the process of buying birdseed baggies when my mom bought the bubbles (she had too much fun at a craft store.) So now we have a crap ton of bubbles with no assigned use.
For me, it’s mostly a matter of the size of the wedding. She’s a bit of a ham, and definitely a sweet-tempered diva in the making, so she’d enjoy it. Is 2 flower girls over doing it when you have roughly 50 non-wedding party guests?
Post # 10
I think she should be a full flower girl since that’s kind of what you offered 🙂 I think it will be cute and not overdoing it at all.